Choosing the right divorce lawyer is crucial for securing your future and getting the best possible outcome from your divorce. It is essential to look for signs that indicate a good attorney, such as their experience, commitment to representing you, and their focus on providing the best settlement possible.
A good divorce lawyer will sit down with their client long before the first court date and present a comprehensive roadmap of the case. They should also be knowledgeable about the law and have a strong understanding of separation, divorce, child custody, and support cases.
Every lawyer has their own approach to divorce, and they may not be good at all in certain areas. A qualified attorney will commit to representing you and spend the time and energy it takes to get you the best settlement possible. A dedicated lawyer does not like to make decisions that are not in your best interest.
When choosing a divorce attorney, be cautious when choosing who to represent you in family law matters. Reach out to your local legal aid society for resources to help you navigate the divorce process. The stakes are high and personal in a divorce, so it’s best not to try on your own.
A good divorce lawyer will take care of you and your case in ways that you may not have considered or beyond what you would normally expect. They can help protect your rights and safety in a legal sense. They should produce quality work product, focused on relevant facts and an accurate representation of the law.
Choose a lawyer with ethical principles and good morals, and avoid “jack-of-all-trades” attorneys. Find one with lots of positive reviews who devotes all or most of their practice to their practice. By following these tips, you can ensure that you have an ethical divorce lawyer by your side in your divorce case.
| Article | Description | Site |
|---|---|---|
| Are divorce attorneys worth it? | Absolutely, a good divorce lawyer is worth their weight in gold. While they don’t come cheap, trying to navigate the divorce process without … | quora.com |
| Is a divorce attorney necessary? : r/AskWomenOver30 | I’m just asking because finances are very tight. Do I need an attorney to “fight for me?” I guess it ultimately comes down to if your spouse … | reddit.com |
| 10 Ways a Good Divorce Lawyer Can Truly Help You | TK Law | A good divorce lawyer is going to take care of you and your case in ways that you may not have considered, and beyond what you would normally expect. | onefirmforlife.com |
📹 Divorce Lawyers Give Relationship Advice Glamour
It’s estimated that about half of marriages end in divorce. Why are so many people getting divorced, and how can you prevent …
How Do I Protect Myself Before Divorce?
To protect yourself financially during a divorce, it's essential to take strategic steps early. Start by creating a financial plan, which includes opening your own bank account and separating joint debts. Monitoring your credit score is crucial, as is taking an inventory of your assets and reviewing your retirement accounts. Consider mediation before litigation to minimize conflict. Hiring an experienced divorce attorney is advisable, and make sure to document all financial information meticulously.
Cancel joint credit cards and lines of credit to avoid shared liabilities, and refrain from signing any agreements without proper legal advice. If children are involved, consider remaining in the family home to secure their stability. Staying organized and proactive is key: gather your financial documents, maintain clear records, and understand your financial situation in detail. While divorce can be stressful, these steps can help protect your interests and facilitate a smoother transition. Remember to prioritize your well-being and financial security as you navigate this challenging time.
Who Loses The Most In A Divorce?
While divorce outcomes vary, statistics show women often face greater financial losses than men following a divorce. Approximately 25% of women may fall into poverty post-divorce, and they generally experience a more significant decline in household income compared to men. This trend also holds true in same-sex marriages, where divorcing lesbians may suffer greater financial hardship than gay men. Despite the personal anticipation of regaining autonomy that informs many divorces, it's essential to recognize the profound effects these transitions entail.
Spousal roles during the marriage largely influence who bears the financial brunt of the divorce, with research indicating women typically endure a heavier financial burden. Both genders do experience a dip in their standard of living, but men may face an increase in income post-divorce, often earning 30% more, while women's incomes tend to drop by 20%. As individuals navigate their separations, it’s crucial to support them through these transitions.
The emotional, financial, and psychological tolls of divorce underscore the importance of a proactive and informed approach in coping with this life-altering event. Ultimately, while both parties suffer losses, the outcomes reveal that women often bear the greatest burdens during and after divorce.
What Is The 5 Year Rule For Divorce In California?
In California, if you have been married for less than five years and do not have children, you may qualify for a simplified divorce process known as summary dissolution. This process allows couples to end their marriage or domestic partnership without a formal court hearing, aiming to provide a quicker and more cost-effective option. The "5-year rule" is not a strict legal statute but serves as a guideline, influencing divorce proceedings. Under this rule, cases unresolved for five years may automatically expire.
For summary dissolution, both spouses must meet specific criteria, including the duration of marriage. If a couple has been together for over five years, standard divorce procedures apply. Additionally, parties need to have lived in California for at least six months and in the current county for three months before filing for divorce.
In regards to property division and spousal support, the duration of the marriage plays a role in determining entitlements. Generally, assets acquired during the marriage are subject to equal division unless specified otherwise, while property owned prior to marriage remains individual. In cases of felony convictions related to domestic violence, exceptions may apply. If parties opt for summary dissolution, the legal process can take a minimum of six months but should ideally conclude within five years.
How Can A Divorce Lawyer Be More Affordable?
Affording a divorce lawyer is a common concern for individuals navigating divorce. To make legal representation more manageable, consider finding a lawyer who offers payment plans or reduced rates, utilizing legal aid, or seeking pro bono assistance from local bar associations. Divorces typically fall into uncontested or contested categories; the former allows spouses to agree on all issues without extensive legal intervention. However, there are methods to reduce costs while ensuring quality representation.
Couples can save money by discussing key issues, such as health insurance, before involving lawyers. While divorce lawyers may not offer free services, many provide discounted options. Eligibility for free legal services often requires meeting specific low-income criteria and divorce prerequisites. Researching affordable divorce lawyers is crucial for avoiding financial strain and effectively managing legal processes. Online divorce services and mediation can also facilitate cost-effective solutions.
Lawyer fees typically range from $3, 000 to $5, 000, with additional hourly charges. However, opting for mediation can lessen expenses as it involves a neutral third party to assist in decision-making, ultimately steering clear of costly court battles. By carefully selecting attorneys, exploring alternative dispute resolutions, and maintaining clear communication, individuals can navigate divorces affordably while minimizing overall expenses and emotional stress.
How To Avoid Getting Screwed In A Divorce?
To ensure a smoother divorce experience and avoid common pitfalls, consider the following essential steps. First, seek professional help, such as a qualified attorney or financial advisor, to safeguard your interests. Ensure you receive your fair share of assets while prioritizing future financial security. It’s vital to terminate joint debts and account for support taxes to prevent unexpected financial burdens. Additionally, transfer retirement assets and enhance your retirement planning to secure your future.
Prepare by understanding your spouse's financial situation and not depositing additional funds into joint accounts. Open your own bank accounts to maintain control of your finances. If there are children involved, their interests should always come first. Avoid making major decisions immediately following the divorce; instead, focus on personal happiness and well-being. Consider creating a new will that excludes your ex-partner, and ensure you’re up-to-date with your credit report.
Remember, long-term relationships formed before the divorce can complicate matters. Lastly, navigate the negotiation process thoughtfully, addressing anticipated costs, such as college tuition, to achieve a fair settlement and protect your interests.
How Much Does A Divorce Cost In California?
The average cost of a divorce in California is approximately $17, 500, which is notably higher than the national average of around $15, 000. Filing fees, a standard cost associated with initiating divorce proceedings, range between $435 and $450. However, the overall cost can vary significantly based on the complexity of the case, particularly if there are contested issues. For example, a mediated divorce typically costs between $3, 000 to $8, 000, especially for shorter marriages. In contrast, divorces without contested issues may average between $4, 500 and $5, 500, while those involving disputes that settle before trial can range from $6, 500 to $8, 000.
The state's high divorce costs are influenced by several factors, including attorney fees, which account for a substantial portion of the overall expense. Notably, divorces involving children can escalate costs to around $26, 000. Although the initial divorce filing fee is fixed, related fees may accrue for additional filings.
On average, the total cost of a divorce in California can reach around $18, 000, heavily dependent on attorney fees and the specific circumstances surrounding the case. Despite the possibility of incurring costs as low as $1, 500 for uncontested divorces, the potential for extensive litigation can push expenses into the tens or hundreds of thousands. Consequently, California stands out as one of the most expensive states for divorce proceedings.
What Type Of Lawyer Is Best For Divorce?
When seeking a divorce attorney, it is crucial to find one with experience in family law, especially if children or significant assets are involved. A litigated divorce is a formal process where unresolved issues are brought to court, necessitating the judge's decisions on custody, support, and property division. Understanding the different types of divorce and the general processes for each will help you determine the best course for your situation.
While some divorces might not require legal representation, hiring an experienced attorney can be beneficial for appealing court decisions and understanding your rights. Before filing, consult a local family law attorney to assess your needs. Effective lawyers should be knowledgeable in family law and skilled in local practices. To find the right attorney, consider key factors such as your preferred divorce type, budget, and referrals.
This guide outlines how to select the best divorce lawyer, associated costs, and tips to minimize fees, ensuring that you make an informed choice that saves time and resources during the divorce process.
📹 A Divorce Attorney’s Thoughts On Love and Marriage-James Sexton
Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of James Sexton, a divorce attorney in New York City. His books, How To Stay In …
To sum up what they said. Dont marry the person you think your partner will one day become, but marry the person they are right now. Too many people fall in love with a fictional version of their partner and that is why they get surprised and hurt when that person never materializes. You are not training a dog, you are spending your life with an individual and if you want to change that individual in significant ways, then it means you dont really respect them and your marriage is doomed.
My parents have been together 35 years since they were 22; They grew up in the 70’s. Observing them I realize that you have to accept and love the other person. I observed that they forgave easily, spoke honestly, and often diffused tension with humor. Both were willing to lose some (even if they were right), because at the end of the day they love each other, and no petty thing topped that sentiment. Lastly, the respect they show each other is probably the most striking thing about their relationship. Growing up my parents got mad and had disagreements like anyone, but I never once saw them yelling at each other or mistreating each other in any way. They grumbled, they stewed, they needed time alone, but somehow 35 years later, there they are: still holding hands when they walk down the street together.
I married someone I wanted growing up. Someone who has a plan, is supportive and loving, pushes me to be better, treats his parents and friends with respect as well as not friends with shady people, a GOOD Father, there is more. Also, I realized if I wanted that I needed to be that so I worked on myself. He’s more than I asked for and appreciate him Soo much I also realized I’m glad he is someone who is willing to sit down and talk about serious things and how we as a couple can resolve it.
Go into the marriage in the knowledge that the feelings will go away, and make sure they know that too. You’re going to annoy each other with your stupid habits and eccentricities, too. Some days you won’t be able to stand each other, and thats okay. You have these days with your friends and family, yet they remain your friends and family. What it truly is about is finding someone who is striving toward the same goal, and this long term vision will wipe away a lot of small differences. If you base a relationship on something that started quickly (passion, etc), you may find that it ends quickly and the relationship has no ground to stand on. If you base it on something enduring, though, it has an enduring foundation.
I feel like marriage is like a tattoo, it used to be a life long commitment, but now we have multiple procedures available for tattoo removal, so people think they can just do that if they get tired of it, same with divorce. The thing is though, it’s going to be time consuming, expensive and painful lol and may forever leave a mark Edit: To be clear, I’m not against marriage nor divorce, what I’m saying is don’t jump the gun in getting married thinking divorce is something to take lightly
I know how there is an emphasis on financial differences, but what about another issue touched upon in the article: not knowing your partner. Like, holy moly my parents were an arranged set up through my grandparents who were church acquaintances, and my parents got divorced when I was three and hate each other to this day. They divorced twenty years ago… divorce is so unpleasant man really really think about who is going to be the mother/father of your kids if you want kids. Like yikes.
It’s definitely important to point out that you’re also not going to find the “Perfect” person. My parents have been married for almost 34 years and they are quite opposite of each other. One is more extroverted the other is more introverted. They have no desire in changing the other, they are happy as they are as individuals and as a couple. I wouldn’t rule out marriage because the other person isn’t exactly what you’re looking for. And wouldn’t rule it out based on numbers either. It’s all situational. As long as morals, values, goals and a fair amount of interests align with clear communication, I foresee success in the future. Commitment needs to be at the same level too obviously, but important to note.
I blame Disney. All of these early princess cartoons teaching girls to find their perfect prince charming, which is usually the same generic person through every movie (how many times have we heard “Ugh, all guys are the same”., “You’re so much like my ex”., “I just wish I could find someone different”). The problem is they keep going for the same type of dude and yet wonder why they constantly are getting heart broken. That’s early programming. Also notice how most Disney princess movies end with the wedding and happily ever after. Even after knowing the prince for a short amount of time. I guarantee that if they had sequels, it’d be a whole different story
I LOVE this article. So many people just think about marriage in terms of love, but really it’s a legally binding contract. That is to say, you can be in love and commit to someone for life without legal obligations, responsibilities, and getting the government involved. It’s really refreshing to see people talk about marriage as it truly is. It’s wild to me that we still enter into huge legally binding contracts based on our emotions.
It’s so true. Marriage is not romantic, it’s a legal contract. You wouldn’t enter into any other legal contract without doing a thorough due diligence and reading through the contract ten times. Make sure you know what you’re getting when you marry someone. The only way to do that is a loooooong engagement and take notice of everything.
Their advice: 1. Understand that marriage is a serious legal commitment ( “You just did the most legally significant thing, other than dying, you’ll ever do” ). 2. Know exactly what you want in a spouse, and realize they may not change ( “You divorce the person you were married to” ). 3. Definitely talk about your finances ( “One of the most important conversations you need to have with your partner before getting married is about your finances” ). 4. An exciting girlfriend or boyfriend might not make a good spouse ( “What a lot of us are looking for in someone to date is very different than what we’re looking for in someone to marry” ). 5. If you do have to get a divorce, try to stay calm ( “The goal is to get to the other side, not to get stuck in the middle” ).
Marriage advice that works: 1. Stop being selfish. Kill selfishness. You aren’t the center of the universe. 2. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive. You aren’t perfect and marriages is the union of two imperfect people. So show grace. 3. Remember the “for better and worse” part. Marriages will come with suffering. Remember the vows in the hard moments when you “feel” there is no love. 4. Always fight for your marriage. 5. Never go outside your marriage. If you got a spouse not meeting “your needs”, do not betray them by seeking it elsewhere. The grass is never greener on the other side. 6. Talk to your spouse like your friends and co workers. Your spouse isn’t your enemy. 7. Don’t ever believe you deserve better. This breeds selfishness, anger and bitterness that’ll kill the marriage. Your spouse cannot fulfill every need. Just some thoughts.
I was recently graduated and financially broke so I didn’t consider needing a prenup. After being married for 2 years, I found out he had $60,000 of credit card debt, plus upside down on his house and truck. Up to his eyeballs in debt. If I hadn’t married him (and handed over my schoolteacher paychecks) he would have had to declare bankruptcy within a year. In the 7 years we were married, I never bought anything personal over $100. When we divorced, I found out that he had a secret po box and he hadn’t been paying my student loans. I was in credit default, penniless, homeless and had 2 kids to feed.
This is great article. I got married last year after being together for 11 years, 8 years living together and 3 years engaged. I must admit that I am proud of myself and my husband that we spent 3 months before we got married on making sure that we look in the same direction in life like finances, children, career and so on. We trusted our photographer, DJ, venue manager etc. that everything is going to be fine on our wedding day, so I didn’t quite focus much on wedding details.
Not marrying sounds fine when you are younger….but as you age, you realize having a partner who knows things you don’t, and can do things you can’t, would be a great benefit in your day to day life. Having a team seems to make life easier. You choose your team-mate! Friends are great…but they aren’t as reliable, available, accessible or dedicated as a spouse can be. Just sayin.
I think you can only change so much for somebody. Talk about the changes. If they are positive proceed, if not just break up. We are 8,000,000,000 probability he or she is the one do not exactly favour us. You have to learn what you can tolerate and what you cannot. Not just in marriage but even dating. Desperation is mostly what leads to inevitable failure.
The most useful article I have watched in a while. Our modern society makes marriage be about the cake or the dress. We are so unprepared for marriage that is not even funny. A vindictive partner will destroy your life and will do so with tremendous pleasure. Don’t forget that our society is made of winners and losers. There can’t be a win win so have a prenup if you want to spare your sanity. These lawyers give great sound advice. Thank you.
What stuck out to me the most in this article was the last line, “Be your spouse’s cheerleader”. I paid for my spouse to go to graduate school when we were engaged. I didn’t have to. After all, our finances were still completely separate. But I wanted her to succeed and better herself. Not because I wanted her to get a better job when we were married, but because I wanted her to be happy doing what she would do with her life. That was a huge reassurance to myself that I was with the right person. 7 years and 3 kids later, we’re stronger than ever. I know there’s lots of time for me to screw this up, but I like my odds.
Some more optimistic views of modern marriage than the 50% failure stat which is often cited. If the 50% of marriages ending in divorce is being inflated by people who have multiple marriages then the chance of first marriages ending in divorce is lower than 50%. indeed doing some research the divorce rate among first marriages is only 30% and for college educated women who marry when older than 25 and have an established source of independent income the divorce rate is only 20%!! There’s a cool psychcentral article that talks about this 🙂
Love is not a feeling, love is a choice. You stick with your spouse through good and bad not because it feels good but because you made a choice to love that person no matter what. Seems that people got divorced because they have incorrect expectation on marriage. It’s like signing up for a college when you don’t even want to study and then later on got surprised because you failed the exam and lost your tuition fee.
My dad is on his second marriage and my mom is on her third. My grandparents are also divorced. I don’t think I’ll ever get married but my current boyfriend if 6 years and are living are own lives while supporting each other and I’m happy to continue doing that as long as we both want to. The only thing we want involves healthcare and being able to make decisions for each other if the other is unable to.
I think you should add one more “don’t pretend to be a different person than you really are; and notice if that person is really who they say they are or they’re just trying to make you like them” There’s a lot of people pretending to be someone else just to be with the person they want, and that’s not going to last forever. If you say you want kids and you don’t, don’t lie, if you say you love animals and in reality you couldn’t care less, don’t lie (that sort of things). You’re going to be miserable and you’re going to make the other person miserable as well. I’m a divorce lawyer too.
A great way to reduce the divorce rate, would be to force a couple to plan out ahead arrangements for divorce. A fair estimate of how family wealth should be split if they wanted to separate. I’m talking percentages (since they will accumulate more wealth over time) and decided who would own theoretical houses, pets, furniture, etc. That way, they’ll have to negotiate and persuade, critical skills for a long term relationship. If they cannot do this simple task fairly and peacefully, the relationship will end right there, which shows they shouldn’t have gotten married in the first place. Another bonus, is that neither spouse can use the indeterminate threat of divorce to coerce the other. Everything has been pre-negotiated, and the contract signed alongside the marriage contract. This should reduce divorce rates by forcing people to truly think if they want to enter such a legal contract with the other person. It’s better to break people up at this before, rather than later down the line.
I have been married for almost 5 years and have been with my husband for almost 11 years. I feel it is important to be respectful and during a fight you should always try to see and understand the other persons point of view and not just focus on why you think you are right. Compromise, respect and good communication are the most important things in a good relationship in my opinion. Spending time together and doing small things that are fun is another thing. A lot of my friends are unhappy and say their daily life is boring and they are bored of their relationship. Me and my husband and our son we make small trips to the park or the mountains, we watch something together, play in the pattio or cook together.. everything that is fun. It is important to live your life together instead of apart.. just my 2 cents 😉 Btw i am a chef and my husband travels for a living😄 and it works
Marriage used to be universally considered as a sacrament, an inviolable oath made. As a 30 year old man living in 2019, the concept of marriage has been so cheapened, so secularised, so relatively trivial an act that I can’t see the importance of it or the benefit. I would love to be able to find someone who considers marriage to be sacred and tie the knot with them but the reality is that men potentially stand to lose so much if a marriage fails, especially financially, that the potential risk of it outweighs the rewards in my view. I don’t think people in general, men and women, take marriage as seriously as they should and I cannot rationalise the decision to make a unity pact with someone when they may not take it seriously. Maybe one day we will wake up and realise what we have lost with trivialising marriage and divorcing willy nilly as if the contract has no sanctity. But I can’t see that happening anytime soon. I’m happy to remain unmarried until that time comes, if it ever does.
I don’t think I’m gonna marry ever because I just can’t share my room with anyone. I had to share room with my 2 brothers until I was 23 and it was a nightmare and I still get flashback. I am 27 now, worked hard bought a small house of my own but I simply cannot share my room with anyone. I love solitude.
I don’t really know how to explain it but I was with my husband for about… 7 years before getting married. Before we got married I FELT married to him. It’s like we had entered this spiritual contract with each other before we entered a legal one. I think that’s how a person knows it’s time. That experience has also led me to believe that people can also have spiritual divorces if that makes sense. Like just because you’re still married, living together, have kids and kiss each other goodnight doesn’t mean you’re not divorced. You just haven’t made it legal yet is all. We’ve now been married for five years and together for 11. I still get that giddy feeling like a teenager who met her first crush when I wake up to his face. Folks that first meet us think we just got together and make comments about the honey moon phase. I definitely married the right person. The honey moon phase never really ended for us. I’m so grateful to have met him and had the privilege to know, love and marry this man.
My husband was never abusive or vindictive and now he is becoming that way after 10 years of being together, almost 6 years married. It makes NO sense to be w great husband for so long and be awful out of no where. I’m really holding onto the marriage but it takes both sides to put the Effort in. My husband forgets we’re on the same team!
You’re still dating that woman after you marry her. Its in a (most) woman inclination to be provided for and taken care, even if she makes equal or less. Your income can stop growing after 45 (no more pay raises, get passed over for promotions by someone younger).. However, property tax increases, kids go off to college, and then she discovers social media… its a wrap
My mom and dad have a very good marriage and been together for a long time.. but what I really respect about them is not just the fact they are In love.. but they both understand their “vows” are a legally binding promise to not just them but to the courts.. and as scary as that sounds they respect the principles of that law and each other
There is another crucial aspect to understand when considering divorce. In sociological data, divorce doesn’t function the same as a choice to quit a job with a long-term company, etc., but functions more like a disease in which people you are around tend to be affected by it in their own decision-making. It’s an odd thing that has been discussed and debated for a long time in family sociology, but the family and friends of people who get divorced tend to be more likely to divorce themselves in the years following. When I was growing up in the time of the dinosaurs, a few of my friends (not many back then) had divorced parents, and I don’t know of any of them who are not divorced themselves now. It’s not like it creates an absolute or a mandate of some kind, but it seems like it can be normalizing and influencing in a way that is destabilizing to families and, more broadly, communities.
Its the legal / financial aspect of marriage and separation that … though it doesnt worry me, is not particularly appealing and I do feel that if I am living according to my principals: 1 not sure if I will end up in a very conventional relationship; 2 I wish to feel as free as possible to leave at any time (trust me, I will) ; 3 why am I getting married? If there is a specific legal / actual benefit that I need to have to proceed with the relationship, then I would seriously consider it.
On another article a lawyer spoke about the prenup agreement, and he said this. The couples where it is very awkward almost always gets divorced in a few years. Couples where it goes easily, and normally usually just put away the prenup, and never have to use it. So getting that prenup is not just a potential insurance for you, but also a good way to force an important conversation, and reveal, if your soon to be wife is planning the divorce already.
As a man I have to say, I had to stand my ground or I would end up with nothing, so I stood my ground and ended up with nothing and all the debt she had accumulated. Best advice is to get a prenup. If you are not married but in a long-term relationship and living together and paying the lions share of expenses, get a prenup. If you are a 12 year old and seeing this, better to learn the realities sooner rather than later! 😮
Live with someone first!! And WAIT. There is no rush. The warts will inevitably come out and at least that way you’ve know you tried before locking it in with someone you wish you hadn’t. I am divorced, seriously, stop getting married because you think you have to or because all your friends are. There is no rush!!
All of this is common sense. No one knows what they really need and want in a marriage in their 20’s…sometimes 30’s and 40’s realistically. I’m so glad that I haven’t been married yet because, now, in my 50’s, I know for sure what I need and want in a mate, because I truly know myself!!! Moreover, I will remain single before settling, just to say I’m married or in a relationship.
It is important for everyone to learn a lot the benefits of marriage and also the major health damages divorce does to the couple and their families. People dont know much the degree marriage affects a persons life and the community. I hope the new generations understand marriage a lot better than the older generations.
Social Media gives women the ability to visually appeal to unlimited amounts of men all across the world. Whereas before social media, she was limited to just whoever she met in her local area. So by giving modern women access to a HUGE VAST amount of ‘choice’, which is what social media has done, it makes things like men committing to marriage INCREDIBLY HIGH RISK…Because divorce laws are still heavily biased in favour of the woman…. and yet women today have HUGE potential to be unfaithful, because the next guy is just one swipe away on a dating app, or social media platform. THINK VERY VERY carefully before getting married in the modern era, especially if you are a man. The cost of living has just SHOT UP during this pandemic, can you really afford to put yourself in the position of legally binding yourself to a woman who has huge amount of options for new exicting men once she gets bored of you? Marry her at your peril…Some of you guys will do this and lose EVERYTHING.
Single and at age 40, no kids ….. I don’t make much money ….. but I feel like I’m living the high life …. most couples that I know of are divorced ….. did not want any part of that …. courts don’t favor men at all ….. women are not what they use to be in the western culture ….. they had class and morals ….. people walk their dogs in PJ’s now …. kids at 8 years old looking like a rainbow head …. the world is going backwards in many ways !
It’s so easy for people to say, marry someone who’s compatible to you. But sometimes it doesn’t matter the lengths you go to ensure you’re compatible, the other person can just absorb everything you say is important to you and use it as a template to catfish you with fake personality. That’s how I ended up with a person that was “perfect for me in every way” only to find out it was just a mask and they have a deep aversion to physical affection (what I told them my love language was). I literally spent my honeymoon begging my spouse to touch me. Like? I’d never experienced something like that in any relationship before. Yeah I had no idea autism was supposed to be on my radar. There really is no pamphlet or inspection before marriage that can prepare you for who the other person really is.
My ex and I had a very civilized divorce. We didn’t need a lawyer. We just kept the emotion out of it and both of us tried to be fair. So we basically spent less than $200 on our divorce – the only cost were the filing fees. The way I look at it – I’d rather lose $1000 in the settlement than $20,000 for a lawyer’s fees.
Yet people do not understand the purpose of marriage. Mariage is to create a family, a structure. What is the point of having kids and divorcing when they’re are little. Didn’t you know you have problems before you decided to have kids. People are only getting married for shallow reason and forgot why marriage was created in first place. This is why arranged marriage last longer than so called love mariage
Here in India, Divorce rates are very low. I know its nothing much perfect here but still what I have seen is people try to their core to not get divorced. Family and social structure pushes a lot to keep the marriage intact, Divorce is last of the last option. I have seen many hopeless marriages getting into tune because parents & in laws were not ready to accept the divorce.