Navigating a custody battle can be emotionally challenging, especially when dealing with a narcissistic ex-partner. To stay strong during this process, practice daily motivation and put a sticky note on a mirror with positive phrases like “I’m a survivor”. Avoid negative speech about the other parent and focus on quality rather than quantity.
As experienced child custody attorneys, we know how to win child custody for fathers and what can be used against you in a custody battle. To increase your chances of maintaining a healthy relationship with your child during a custody fight, focus on quality, not quantity. Parents should bring their children to therapy to help them process their emotions and cope with the multiple changes that occur before, during, and after a divorce.
Understand the reasons for losing custody by reviewing the Court’s decision and identifying the issues that led to the loss of custody rights. Take corrective actions by addressing the concerns raised by the other parent. Coping with losing custody can be difficult, but you might have legal options to regain your rights. Equip yourself with emotional resilience and practical tips to navigate child custody battles.
Biases in custody decisions stem primarily from psychological blind spots and a poor knowledge base of interpersonal relationships. If a court has to intervene, they will put the needs of the children first. Improve yourself and be a better person when you are not, surprise them when you meet each time by reading books, developing hobbies, or helping. Professional therapists or counselors specializing in family issues can provide valuable support.
When a parent loses custody, it is like a death without the support system. There is no closure, and by allowing yourself to move forward positively, you may be able to work toward regaining custody of your children. Focus on the positive during these bouts with stinging tears and puffy eyes. Continue to love your children and spend time with them. Look over the parenting plan or any documents in place to continue a relationship.
Article | Description | Site |
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How to Deal with Child Custody Loss | Professional therapists or counselors specializing in family issues can provide valuable support. Joining support groups, either in-person or … | hellodivorce.com |
How To Cope with Losing Custody of Your Child | Coping with losing custody can be difficult. You might have legal options to regain your rights, so contact a seasoned family attorney today. | colwell-law.org |
Losing Custody Of Children – One Woman’s Struggle | When a parent loses custody, it’s like a death without the support system. There is no closure. Loss of custody is as traumatic an event as death. | bizcatalyst360.com |
📹 How Can A Mother Lose Custody Of Her Child?
As mothers in the middle of custody battles, it can be easy to be overconfident and think you’ll win. But this is not always the case …
How Do You Play Dirty In A Custody Battle?
Parents may engage in various manipulative tactics during custody battles to undermine their co-parent's relationship with the child. These tactics include brainwashing, badmouthing the other parent, manipulating the child, lying, isolating the child from friends and family, and making false accusations. Such dirty tricks can occur before, during, or after custody hearings. Red flags to look for include games of distraction and deceitful behavior, which can significantly impact the custody arrangement.
It's crucial to maintain your child's best interests by avoiding negative speech about the other parent and refraining from dishonest claims that the other parent poses a danger to the child. Parents should not record others without consent or engage in financial sabotage, such as maxing out credit cards or cleaning out bank accounts. To navigate these challenging situations, hiring a competent attorney is essential, along with seeking co-parenting classes and counseling for both parties.
It's vital to be aware of how some may resort to fake violence or false accusations to gain custody. Overall, prioritizing the child's needs and maintaining a positive relationship with both parents can help in achieving the best outcome during custody disputes.
What Are The Psychological Effects Of Losing Custody?
A study indicates that mothers losing custody face higher risks of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse than those dealing with a child's death. Additionally, divorce and separation elevate anxiety and depression levels in children and adolescents. Custody decision-making often suffers from psychological blind spots and inadequate understanding of interpersonal dynamics, with judges lacking sufficient training in these areas. Clinical psychologist Mia Smith-Bynum emphasizes the detrimental impact of forceful separation on parents, exacerbated by feelings of helplessness.
Losing custody can be more traumatic for biological mothers than the death of a child, leading to significant mental health challenges, including anxiety and depression. Emotional trauma can affect both children and parents before, during, and after separation, with pediatricians encouraged to monitor behavioral changes. The aftermath of custody loss creates pervasive feelings of sadness, rejection, and broken bonds, mirroring the grief associated with death.
Factors such as mental illness can lead to custody loss when a parent cannot care for their child, while emotional responses to divorce vary based on perceived control and betrayal. Overall, parental separation is linked with increased risks for child adjustment issues and harmful outcomes for mental health.
How Long Do Most Custody Battles Last?
A custody battle can be resolved in as little as 30 days or extend for several years, with the average duration typically ranging from 6 months to 2 years. The timeline largely hinges on factors such as complexity of the case, court backlogs, and the willingness of the parents to cooperate. Mediation and agreement between parties can significantly shorten the process. According to recent statistics, a considerable number of child custody cases remain unresolved within a year, with many cases in places like Philadelphia showing only 40% resolved in that timeframe.
Legal expertise plays a crucial role in how lengthy these disputes can be, as good lawyers can streamline the process. While some cases may be concluded in a few weeks, others could take over three years if contested. Factors such as court schedules, specifics of the case, and the responsiveness of both parties contribute to the length of a custody battle.
Maximal time limits recommended by certain states indicate that custody matters should ideally conclude within 18 months. Moreover, a custody battle can often cost families upwards of $100, 000 collectively, underscoring the financial and emotional impact of these disputes. Each case is unique, with various elements influencing the duration and outcome, emphasizing the importance of preparedness and legal guidance.
Who Wins Most Child Custody Cases?
Mothers historically win a majority of custody battles due to ingrained societal roles that view them as primary caregivers. This perception has led judges to often award primary physical custody to mothers, with fathers receiving limited visitation rights. Historically, this trend was particularly pronounced throughout the 19th and 20th centuries. However, the legal standard now governing custody decisions is the "best interests of the child," which varies in interpretation. While statistics indicate that mothers receive custody in about 83% of cases, misconceptions persist about inherent biases favoring mothers in family courts.
A 2016 census report highlights that only 17. 5% of fathers obtain custody, illustrating the disparity. Notably, some custody battles are determined outside of court, with a significant majority (over 90%) being settled amicably.
Factors such as financial stability and cooperation between parents also play critical roles in custody outcomes. Additionally, despite the belief that mothers always win custody, family law judges are mandated to make unbiased decisions. The complexity of custody cases means there isn’t a definitive pattern, as outcomes can also hinge on individual case specifics, including parental behavior and circumstances. Thus, while mothers often emerge as custodial parents, each case is unique, reflecting varying interpretations of what serves the child's best interests.
How To Cope After Losing Custody?
Seeking counseling or therapy can provide vital support for parents who have lost custody of their children. Professionals experienced in cases of custody loss can guide individuals through the emotional turmoil that often follows this challenging experience. Protective parents, especially those who lost custody to abusive partners, might feel overwhelmed and anxious. However, with the right guidance and support, it is possible to navigate this difficult period.
Programs like Mentor Moms and Dads offer essential resources for parents seeking to regain custody, emphasizing that regaining rights requires persistent effort to demonstrate improvements to the family court system. Tools such as Soberlink can assist in tracking sobriety, enhancing a parent’s case.
Coping strategies are crucial. Daily affirmations, participating in mediation, and joining support groups can foster resilience. It's important to accept feelings of loss, while also recognizing that regaining custody is achievable through personal accountability and professional guidance. Engaging in self-care and talking to trusted individuals can complement legal strategies and create a stronger foundation for healing. Ultimately, parents must show the court they have addressed the issues leading to custody loss to successfully restore their rights.
Should You Talk To Your Ex During A Custody Battle?
In a custody battle, it's vital to maintain direct communication with your ex, particularly to foster your children’s relationships with both parents. Establishing respectful communication can significantly influence court outcomes and ultimately benefit the children. Important factors considered by judges include each parent's ability to promote the child's bond with the other parent.
Effective communication is crucial; however, impulsive phone calls should be avoided, as they can escalate conflicts. Instead, using text or email for correspondence is recommended, and a parenting app may help facilitate communication. Avoid negative speech about your ex—courts prioritize the child’s best interest and may interpret any hostile remarks as detrimental. Your behavior and interactions should reflect a commitment to your child’s needs over personal grievances.
Common pitfalls include speaking ill of the other parent, engaging in emotional outbursts, and neglecting the importance of a two-parent involvement in the child's upbringing. Rather than allowing personal disputes to overshadow parental responsibilities, strive to cooperate and communicate effectively—this can lead to a more favorable environment for both the children and the custody arrangements. Remember, the aim is to create a supportive co-parenting dynamic, which judges tend to favor. If needed, consider mediation to facilitate better communication pathways.
What Is The Malicious Parent Syndrome?
Malicious Parent Syndrome (MPS) is characterized by four main behaviors exhibited by a vengeful parent during or after a divorce. Firstly, it involves punishing the other parent by alienating their children and involving external parties, such as the courts. Secondly, it seeks to obstruct the other parent's visitation, communication, and participation in the child's activities. Thirdly, it includes consistent lying to manipulate perceptions of the other parent.
Typically prevalent in high-conflict divorces, MPS can severely impact both the child and the targeted parent, with extreme cases involving mistreatment of the children to harm the other parent's reputation. This syndrome is intertwined with concepts like Demonizing Parent Syndrome, where one parent intentionally damages the bond between the child and the other parent through false accusations and negative portrayals. Although termed as a syndrome, MPS is not a recognized mental disorder but rather describes a pattern of behavior aimed at undermining the co-parent’s relationship with their child.
Actions indicative of MPS can include spreading negative narratives, direct alienation tactics, and behaviors manifesting a desire for control, leading to significant emotional harm within post-divorce family dynamics. Understanding MPS is crucial in navigating the challenges posed by high-conflict divorces.
How To Survive A Custody Battle?
Navigating a child custody battle can be challenging, but certain strategies can help you through the process. First, it's crucial to cooperate with your ex, as showing willingness to communicate can highlight your suitability for custody. Understanding your motivations and focusing on your children's well-being is essential. Gather evidence of your parenting capabilities, such as testimonials from caregivers, while also recognizing your weaknesses to address them effectively. Importantly, honesty in court is paramount; any falsehoods could jeopardize your chances.
Maintaining a calm demeanor and respectful attitude towards your ex is vital, as negative speech could reflect poorly in court. Explore mediation as an alternative to litigation to save time and expenses. Daily motivation is also helpful—consider positive affirmations to keep your spirits up. Establish a good first impression for custody evaluations, ensuring both your personal and home environments reflect your parenting ability.
Additionally, prioritize your health through a balanced diet and exercise, while seeking support from friends and family. Always focus on your children's best interests, staying punctual and engaged in their lives. Lastly, consider advice specific to your circumstances—such as dealing with a difficult co-parent—and be proactive in preparing for the legal aspects of custody arrangements to enhance your chances of success.
How Stressful Is A Custody Battle?
Children caught in custody battles frequently experience intense emotional stress, leading to increased anxiety, depression, and behavioral issues. This stress can also manifest physically, as parents navigating litigation may feel overwhelmed and helpless. It's often difficult for parents to identify signs of stress in their children, particularly young ones. Judges consider various factors when determining custody, and parents must avoid common mistakes, such as negative speech about the other parent, as emotional outbursts and harmful habits can significantly impact custody decisions.
The key to managing a custody battle lies in maintaining a positive mindset and preparing for challenges. Parents should be mindful of their stress levels, as the battle can impact mental health, leading to courtroom anxiety and poor decision-making. Seeking emotional support is crucial during these times. Tips for coping include practicing daily motivation and focusing on the child’s best interests.
Maintaining a healthy approach, setting aside negative emotions, and supporting each other can improve chances in court. Ultimately, equipping oneself with knowledge about common pitfalls in custody battles and staying emotionally centered can help protect the parent’s role and the child's well-being.
What Is The Biggest Mistake In Custody Battle?
In custody battles, prioritizing the child's best interests is paramount, yet many parents make significant blunders that can jeopardize their cases. Key mistakes include speaking negatively about the other parent, which can alienate the child and harm the overall case. Seeking sympathy from a child, poor communication between parents, and unjustifiably withholding access to the other parent can also be detrimental. Misrepresenting issues such as substance abuse, separating siblings in blended families, and failing to adequately prepare for hearings further complicate custody disputes.
It’s vital for parents to avoid using children as tools in their disputes, as such actions often backfire. Preparation, understanding legal frameworks, and maintaining clear, respectful communication with the other parent can greatly improve one’s position in custody matters. Mistakes often stem from conflating personal needs with the child's needs or failing to set realistic goals during the custody process.
Overall, these missteps not only harm the parent’s legal standing but also adversely impact the child's well-being. For a more favorable outcome, parents should seek professional support and focus on cooperation rather than conflict, ensuring the child’s needs remain the priority throughout the custody battle.
📹 Winning A Custody Battle Four Things You Must Do
With divorces comes another inevitable battle – getting custody of your child/ren. As a former custody examiner for the court, I’ve …
I’m am a father with residential custody. I went to pick up my kids for my parenting time and their mother had moved out of state, 1,250 miles away from me. So, it can be done guys. Document everything and follow the court order to a T. I even went as far as completely quitting drinking. Also, hire an attorney! Focus on your kids. They’re only kids for a short time. Good luck guys!
We give God all the glory. I have gone to court on two other different cases without a lawyer and won. There are times when a lawyer is needed, so let the Holy Spirit lead you. Prayer and fasting always work for directions. You never, never assume anything. Always seek the Lord’s face before you do anything legally. Chaplain Hope
I have a friend and her ex-husband who honestly handled custody of their daughter better than anyone! These two despised each other, their divorce was a nightmare. Then came custody, they turned into very different people. Dad stayed in the home, Mom moved two blocks away. Their daughter was 14 at the time of the divorce, at the time it was safe for the child to walk between the two homes. Basically the child lived with Mom, but could go to Dad’s anytime and often stayed overnight at Dad’s during the week or weekends. Both parents were able to constructively talk to each other when it came to their daughter. When it came to money again no issues, Dad offered to pay support but Mom was able to take care of her own bills. In the end both patents just equally bought things as needed, paid fees or whatever again somehow both parents were able to communicate. I believe they both understood they were equally responsible for paying their daughter’s bills. If my friend had unexpected bills, her ex had no problem paying for things that my friend usually paid. Weirdest thing that they could make parenting work but not their relationship.
I think using custody to enforce court orders when it is detrimental to the child is wrong. I think the proper way to deal with disobedience of court orders is with a contempt petition. In my case, from day one my daughter’s dad lied and also asked for court orders just so he could claim I was violating them. He actually filed a petition for contempt which was totally bogus, but within a few months I was violating orders. So he supplemented the contempt petition. I got some gag orders overturned on appeal, but you are supposed to follow them until they are overturned. I cannot follow a court order if it is going to hurt my daughter mire in the long run. Sometimes having custody is not the most important thing, protecting the child from additional trauma is. The courts really failed us, but I trusted the system at first and was compliant and cooperative. When I figured out what was going on, I had to push back. In my case, we had never been married. We worked from an agreed order until our daughter was old enough to go to school and then he decided to cut me out of her life. I could not afford a lawyer and he had one that lied with impunity. I always supported my daughter’s relationship with her dad. He completely erased me. I am appealing the latest custody modification order. I can see very easily why some parents walk away. I have known many parents whose children were torn apart like a piece of meat two dogs were fighting over. Some kids committed suicide or ended up in mental hospitals.
My in-laws are acting so much like that mother, who is completely obsessed with what I do. My inlaws reach out to family members of mine that don’t like me, and they have made 10+ CPS complaints, etc and have made many threats to take my child away. This anxiety inducing behavior is very bad. They are so focused on ruining my life and relationship with my child that it has cost me so much money and time away from my child. I have struggled with work and keeping up with my life. In addition, the damage they have done to my family is irreparable. They were granted visitation even though they are the step great-grandparents, but they are given many decision making rights over my child. My child is being used as a pawn, and then this is corrupting our lives. I am appealing this order, but I am considering suing my inlaws for all of this emotional and mental anguish.
Son’s father has focused on me, it’s just the beginning of my battle, my ex has just trashed me, and hasn’t thought about our son, he abandoned me, took all the money and I absolutely don’t know what to do, he’s alienated me from our son and has the courts on his side, I have no attorney and he is just trashing me all over to get our son
I’m so cordial with my sons father! I’m so accommodating for him to even see my son. And now out of no where he isn’t allowing my contact w my son and texted me that he isn’t coming back and that he has a protective order for them! If he wanted to get custody why didn’t you just go thru the court? But your sole focus is to keep me out his life! His mom that has been raising him his whole life! I’m so lost and scared that I will never see my baby again
In my situation, me and my ex-wife agree. That the courts took advantage of us. She was coached in the decisions that she’s didn’t want to do. In return she lost rights. Not only had to jump through hoops of life. But jump through someone else’s hoops that has no connection or understanding. Child support is a corporation. By law and actually has nothing to do with the quality of life of the child. The House Always Wins
I’m one, separated from my children, court supported my estranged husband… 2001 gained temporary sole custody. He had immigration pick me up, processed and then took my kids out of state…even refusing to pay for court ordered guardian ad litem, and counsellors for my kids. We divorced in Dec 2006.
I have full custody of my Daughter and I was awarded supervised visits at my discretion because my ex wife was on drugs and abandoned her and left for over 9 months and now is trying to get visits without paying child support or doing the required classes for visiting and is very verbally abusive so in that aspect what do I do
I represented myself both times I was up against the fathers of my children—I couldn’t afford an attorney, and wound up doing it myself. What I learned is to win, which I managed each time, considering ANYONE’S benefit other than the child’s will not serve you well, and it shouldn’t. In the state of Utah, women rank in the bottom 5 states even it comes to having rights. This isn’t a discussion point, we’ve ALL seen it, unless you’re blind. However, when responsibility is sought for the child, irresponsible parents, whether female or male, will more than likely have a selfish glow that’s nearly visible. Occasionally, you’ll meet a parent whose ONLY interest is claiming something meaningful from the other person. With the most meaningful right being the children, unfortunately, this needs to be factored in. With one of my exes, that was the ONLY reason he fought for custody. Needless to say, the judge picked up on it. That ex hasn’t laid eyes on his beautiful daughter, living half an hour away, in over a decade. He hasn’t called for holidays or written cards for birthdays, because he’s selfish. Thank god that glowed! Remember, put your own differences aside for the interest of your child—not for custodial reasons; because that’s what your child deserves!
we are dealing with flying monkets. my partner has supervised phone calls and then supervisor is his daughter’s baby sitter. 15 phone calls were missed and she has assisted the girl in leaving voice-mail wiht false and already recanted abuse accusations. we finally got a call on fathers day and the daughter told us that mom didn’t want her to talk to dad. supervisor won’t respond to messages asking to confirm this.
How do you deal with a mother who withholds the child from visitation and won’t obey court orders? Does it hurt your chances as a father if your child has been away from you for a long time? My ex even tries to say that “Our child can’t find peace, is struggling and has a very bad reaction after visitation (which is a lie).. but everything is “perfect” and our child is striving when only mom is in the picture”..
Motherhood is not just about pregnancy and giving birth. It’s about having a genuinely God-like power and influence over a vulnerable, impressionable, brand-new human being. The infant’s base brain circuitry is set for life for better or worse by mom. My brain is a fried mess today, thanks to you-know-who. I am so tired trying to heal myself and I still have half a lifetime to get through! I am exposing my children to as many real-life positive role models as possible as I am aware of my own inner issues and limitations from my own upbringing. As a result, my kids are awesome and make me so happy! I am so proud of them! I am tearing up just typing this in.
This was good info but I feel like I have special surcomstance in obeying the court order, let me explain. I take my daughter out for the exchange as the court order requires it to be at curbside of the home. Her father parks down the road at someone else’s residence and will not park at mine, then when my daughter fights me about going and I keep saying why and you say you have fun when your there and it’s your dads time she just cries. I ask for his assistance and he threatens to file contempt and has, we are going to court for it, but then says if she doesn’t get into his car with 15 min he’ll leave and file contempt. Now he is using that against me trying to get full custody, they have combined the contempt and the custody trial. I don’t understand, I did everything I could to get her to go aside from dragging her and throwing her in his car, I did record it. He tries to create situations and say I’m not following the court order. Just something for you guys to think about I guess. Not sure what that means but I even ground my daughter when she does this because he is not listening and that still doesn’t help. Side note, my daughter has also been diagnosed by a court appointed evaluator to have separation anxiety.
I’m currently going through a custody battle and due to the fact I have a criminal case pending to an alleged battery on an officer and my daughters dad, although I have no recollection. And him not knowing where I was but appeared there with a camera recording already. I honestly think someone roofied me & it wouldn’t surprise me if my daughters dad got someone to do his dirty deed. Now, he’s blackmailing me saying if I file paperwork I will lose all custody, in which I’m terrified. My daughter has always been with me since born, i breastfed for 3 years, and now she’s 5 and because I missed a court she was taken away from me over night and she is autistic. He doesn’t allow me to talk to her for weeks At a time. And now I only see her twice a month. I have filed numerous police Reports online of him violating our court order, I have a letter from his older sister stating My daughters best interest is with me. He’s had our autistic daughter hold a gun and So much more…I need help and I feel like mo one is hearing my cries for help!
So I don’t know if anybody will read this, but in the divorce my ex-wife claimed 100% physical custody of my kids, and then my middle son told me, that Mom will spend two or three nights at a time, away from home. Should I see about getting the court to intervene? As a follow-up, a private investigator confirmed that she would spend two or three days away from home at a time.
Joint custody with children’s dad. He’s court ordered to get them every other weekend thur-sun since may 2018. Took them off his insurance 1 month after he was ordered to put them on. He doesn’t call them. Doesn’t know their teachers or doctor’s names. Children are 5 and 7. He refuses to talk to me about the kids; constantly belittles and degrades me for not working like i used to. I want to move out of town where i’ll have physical support so i can better provide for our children. He does pay child support, and makes more money now than when order went into effect. I don’t want more money. I want him physically present. At the same time, i don’t know how he’d treat them since he doesn’t want them, (he’s told me that). Our 5 year old had a twin brother who died at 3 days old from a heart defect.
My baby mother is a deadbeat who doesn’t provide fir our daughter whatsoever. My daughter is 2 years old and she’s never had a job until now, only because the government provided her with housing so she has to pay rent. I have my 2 year old 24/7 and she comes to look at her like she’s a damn doll rather than a child. She has abandoned our child with me over 10x to where I had to put out missing person reports… I’ve been holding off for a over year not taking her to court for full custody just for the hope of her being here fir our daughter. In the end I still feel like a single father on the daily. It is definitely time for me to go to court, not for me, for this little girl
On the other hand, there are family members who ignore abuse. (The Home School Legal Defense Association protected many of us when we were home schooling. Just an anonymous tip, and your kids are seized without any due process: speedy hearing with impartial jury. There is some sort of human trafficking going on in reprobate courts. In Florida well-to-do elderly are taken and put under guardianship so the courts, guardians, and lawyers can munch on their wealth.)
I need help with a When vindictive mother makes false claims and statements leaves them on talking parents and I’m stuck with: 1) Not to respond to it and dose it look like I accepted her claim? 2) Response in the attempt to professionally defuse the conflicting conversation of false statements in somewhat defend myself?
In my case my ex has put the kids in the middle he’s been telling the children to keep secrets against me and continues to say negative comments I have not said anything about their father in front of them I rose above what has gone on he has been dishonest in court. I don’t claim to be perfect I went through parenting classes and communication workshop with the court he hasn’t been honest through the entire process unfortunately my ex has used them as pawns. I don’t say anything to the children he’s doing it unfortunately on purpose I haven’t said anything unfortunately in my case there’s conjugal abuse It’s very difficult the court here doesn’t look at it as a pattern of abuse I find it very difficult I’m being the better parent I’m legally not allowed to say anything in front of the kids I can’t even say when they look unbathed and nails dirty and uncut I’m not even allowed at all I’ve been keeping a journal for behavior I’ve noticed, but say nothing to them of what I observe. My ex hasn’t paid any child support hasn’t brought them to doc appointments or dentists me and my parents it has fallen on our plates as extra responsibilities and expenses unfortunately It’s documented in a binder for court I find the system here is very difficult he’s stolen from me and has gotten the kids to steal and hasn’t been honest I can’t even ask the kids about the items I will not put my kids in the middle I love my kids with all my heart and will fight for them.
I got pregnant with my child’s biological father after knowing him for 5 weeks. He wasn’t involved with me much and I was trying to make him be involved. I moved in with him and his parents about 2 weeks before she was born. I found out he was on tinder. He was with me at hospital and name on birth certificate. I didn’t get along with his family and he barely helped me. I left him right after she had turned 1. I moved back in with my parents. He told me I had to co parent with him because children need a father. He asked me to co parent with him. He was verbally abusive to me when I was with him. He would always yell at me in front of my daughter. I left because of him being on tinder and because of all the yelling. He said I would have her 4 days and he would have her 3 days. It kind of worked up until he started seeing his ex. He then got engaged to his ex really fast. Then he moved in with her. After that happened he started changing the co parent plan. Every time I saw him he would say something negative to me. She started saying all these diff reasons how she was sick. At first it was believable. Then she started to say she didn’t want my daughter at her house if she had a cold or anything. Although if she got sick there she was sent back to me sick no exceptions. So sometimes my daughter would be with me 3 weeks in a row. Sometimes his mom would watch Lily too. But his fiancé continues to say she is sick. She said she had pink eye in her stomach. Said she was immune compromised.
Well, sometimes the father is the BETTER parent. My bf is alienated from his children because his ex wife is angry that he didn’t want to work out things with her. She would hit him etc. Days before the actual incident his oldest child was saying he was going to miss his side of the family and it’s been almost 2 years he hasn’t seen them and she talks ill of him on Facebook
I hate that I have tried my hardest to get along with the father of my child and his wife, I have been vulnerable, apologized when I was in the wrong, and not given into their drama as much as I could with nothing in return… no child support, nothing for our child, and no apology(which is the least of my worries)… we haven’t been to court yet because he said he was going to settle and sign the order but he hasn’t… but even though he hasn’t signed the order I still give him visitation…. I have been dumb and went like a month without letting him see her, but again, no order hasn’t been signed…. He has been getting visitation now and I’m trying to do everything I’m supposed to do even though he hasn’t given me any support wish me luck on doing the right thing… yes I still mess up and feed into the drama and get annoyed at them because of all the stuff they say, but I’m trying to work it all out and I think it will get better after the court date next month.
I have a child that has just turned 8yrs old. I have him on Fridays after i finish work until Sunday then he goes home to his mother. A few weeks ago my son told me his mum sold little white bags out of her car. I took my son off her for a few weeks and then I tried to work things out because she had denied any knowledge. And now my son is back with his mother he is sleeping at her house, stays at her friend’s and new boyfriends house. My son told me that he had stayed in his mums friend’s bed with him and his mother but my sons mother stayed in the next room in the house.. my sons school phone me up whilst I’m working nearly everyday asking why my son is not in school. My son does not eat much or wash at home because his mother does not prompt him to. What should I do? Should I take his away from her and make her go to court? I am stressed everyday worrying where my son is and I have spoke to the social services, they just keep saying they think I should do what I think is right for my son they can’t tell me what they think I should do. It would be really helpful for some good advice I don’t really have anyone that can talk and help me out.. the social services have been on my sons mums back for a few years now and I have no bad records at all. Help me out please
What do you do when the other parent is an abuser and an alcoholic? My wife and I have been together for 6 years and have I have a strong relationship with her 2 daughters. There mom lost custodial to their dad who berated, beat, and stalked her while they were together and afterwards. She had no lawyer and he had a lawyer. The house they bought together went to him cause he only put it in his name. He is just a trash person. He constantly tried to drage the kids into every little disagreement. He has called the police because they girls didnt want to speak to him during our custody. The kids gave even asked me if I could be their dad instead which breaks my heart. We have tried co parenting with him it is impossible. We invite him to their birthday parties and I even had to kick him out omce because he slapped the oldest daughter. I really could use some advice. No idea how we could get custody back so the girls dont have to keep suffering in that toxic alcoholic environment.
What happens when the other still pursues a relationship with you when you don’t want them back because they cheated.. They come by without calling, etc.. No boundaries..I get worried about stalking and them not having anything to do. When does the court see this for what it is and could become? And that they talk bad about your family, too.
I’ve tried time after time after time to repeatedly try and get my daughters mom to try and be close to my daughter she gave her to me a little over 6 months ago but she ultimately doesn’t want anything to do with my little girl so I pretty much give up on that we have court in about a month so fingers crossed I’ll get custody of her
My ex has alienated my children from me and used the courts to take away my visitation. It is heartbreaking. I want a good relationship with my children AND my ex husband. I left him because we had a toxic relationship. He believes that because I’m an ex wife, I should be an ex mother. I haven’t seen my boys for a year and my daughter for 4 months. I have done all in my power including $30,000 in legal representation to try and get some visitation and am now waiting on reconciliation counseling. My ex has sabotaged it up until now.
Sometimes a person might not “feel” it. But I can say after several decades of marriage to the same person, that it has a lot to do with action. Do you love your spouse? Then ACT like you do. Sometimes it must be really hard if there is abuse of family members or drugs or crazy spending, etc., but apart from that and maybe sometimes even then, many marriages could be restored and better than ever. ACT like you love the person you promised to love “till death do us part.” Maybe it’s because my parents & grandparents showed how it was done. I saw my grandma take grandpa out of the smoke shop by the ear; he was bent over saying, “Ouch, ouch, ouch!” Today in such a situation it would have been different, different language too. (Baron Montesquieu speaks of nations being destroyed by reprobation/demoralization/lack of virtue. 1962 & 1973 were huge steps in that direction for the USA.) What was the ear pulling about? Grandma was afraid Grandpa was going to gamble away the family farm. After that, he continued to visit the back of the smoke shop to play cards. Whether he was gambling big before or not, I do not know; but after that, it was just about cards. He would bring his winnings home in candy bars.
I have a case where my stepson keeps telling us he gets hit by his stepdad and whenever my husband brings it up, mom says dad is making up things because he is jealous of her new relationship. We’re currently dealing with cps because my stepson came with shoe imprints on his bottom and mom keeps saying her son is lying and that dad is putting things in his head. Her husband did admit to hitting him right in front of her but every time her son, 4, asks why do you let him hit me? Mom keeps calling him a liar. My stepson even told me once he knows his mom doesn’t like his dad but he does. So I’m sure there’s some parental alienation going on there. Any advice for us? We’ll be going to court as mom wants to modify a court order on his visitation being supervised because cps is investigating her husband and her for child abuse.
Thank you my son has 2 baby moms that treat him this way one constantly wants to arrest him for kidnapping on his weekends when he takes his son around family member she don’t like… well the son told his father all what mother was doing and his mother has mental abuse him he is 12 and wants to go live with his dad and well I have had to fill child abuse charges on her cause my grandson texted me and begged me to please make mom stop hit and punching me and calling me names…Mammoo make her stop!!! My heart drop I had to send the police for a welfare check!!! My son can’t afford a lawyer DCH finally got involved and we are working on trying to get him
What if a mother has a second child from another Father and tells that child negative things about the child’s siblings Father? Dealing with custody battle, I was visiting the mom to see my child, and whenever she would leave the room, her 10 year old son would come out his room, stand there, to “supervise” me and return to his room when his mother came back. Is that not considered negative?
I’m dealing with a narcissist and an abuser please I need help I wanna get child support and get full custody of my child my daughter dad can’t even cook for himself let alone feed my child he would rather spend money on beer than buy food for my kid and it’s his kid too he doesn’t deserve her at all I tried my hardest to keep him happy but he’s a narcissist and emotionally abusive I need help what can I do ?
Idk, my mom flagrantly violated all these. It was documented by 2 court appointed psychologists and the GAL. All my dad got was a court order for 2 days a week visitation. My experience has been women can literally kidnap their kids and flee the state in defiance of court orders, and still retain primary custody. But my experience is admittedly an anecdote
my ex gf pulled a huge stunt out of no where, literally havent seen her for 2 years and left her alone but continued to have my child 40 percent of the time, because she wouldnt allow 50, then out of no where she called social services on me, made this huge list of accusations, started bashing me online to people, started being extremely rude to me, i didnt do anything to her or my kids, she is just creating drama out of thin air and i dont know why, the only thing i can think of is that she must of got caught up in a lie that involves me and was being cheered on by her gfs to go on the attack
What about when there’s DV involved and the other parent is actually a concern? I have a protection order against dad, but I still want whatever is best for baby, so I play his game and try to co-parent. Whatever happened between he and I isn’t my child’s fault, but he isn’t a safe person for me. He’s also in another state where the PO isn’t able to be enforced…
This is Exactly what happened with our current custody battle. Evaluator sided with my husband and I over his two children. Mom is unwilling to admit any fault, recorded her children, all she talked about is what happened 10 years ago. We were very careful, respectful and henremained humble through this process and we are pleased it served him. I am thankful for your articles. Wish us luck we are nearing then end of year battle hopefully. Thank you again from Idaho
My daughter needs advice from you and your team of experts. She is an amazing mother. Kind, loving and so patient. Abusive marriage after he cheated and left her with nothing. He kept their daughters when they went to visit him. It’s been over 2 years since she’s seen them in person. The judge seems to be bias. She has evidence of alienation. It’s abuse. The older daughter has shared suicidal ideations with trusted people who shared and or showed my daughter what was said. P lease help!
I’m so scared. We are going start mediation next week and I’m hoping and praying for my stbx to come to this with an open mind, willing to compromise, realize that me and him are the parents (not the grandparents), and most importantly that it’s not about winning it’s about the kids (not what is convenient with him). He is trying to get full custody, majority parenting time, his mom as the babysitter/teacher because he doesn’t want them to go to school. And even if it hurts I want to do 50/50 with him because it’s what’s right for our girls.
My son with down syndrome was taken when he was 9 months old. The father was never with him for the entire the 7 months. The father was made to pay child support and given rights to visit, visits were to be in my home. I allowed his family to come and visit. September by November 21 they made allegations againts me, saying I starved my baby. Saying my apartment was in horrible condition. None was true… I had no lawyer to represent me, as he did. I was never aware of the allegations but I was coarse to go to court, made to read all the allegations. No proof and no CPS was involved. I don’t see how this even happened… How was I put to defend myself and I walked out with the hearing, that I would only have every other weekend visit. All I heard was the father slander me and make me look unfit and still I was in shock of everything because till the day of court he was coming around pretending everything was OK. Until his new attorney called me saying he had concerns that he NEVER addressed with me. He never even cared to hear if I bought the baby anything new. That I wanted to buy him a crib, he also used co sleeping against me. He’s denied me phone calls to speak with my baby. I don’t get how a judge can do this… How do they rip a baby from his mother!!!
3 years now my ex says shes moving to texas from Kansas and my 10 yr old daughter says she doesn’t want to go to texas and say with me. 3 times my ex moved and I had my daughter 3 times she moved back later in the year and took kid back. I still pay support to mom and I’ve never got to claim kid on taxes. 2020 was a hard year financially I recieved no child credit or stimulus or claimed kid. Mom did. I was not behind until end of 2020 on support. Now they are taking my return for arrears and a bill from the mom when we were married 10 yrs ago and a tag on car violation from 2013. I’ve had tags every year since thin and renewed license never was informed of violation. Now all tax return is gone to ex and state. I’ve recently seen where irs and state only abide by state when it pertains to the mom benefiting. I drive every weekend or every other weekend and its 8 hrs of driving shes never made the drive except 1 time since divorce. I’m at my end. I have 1 other kid over 20 with another woman and I never was allowed to claim kid even with court order custodial has to fill out a form allowing me to claim . Court has no power I guess and she left for 8 years. Judge said he couldn’t do anything. And whe my ex takes daughter back it’s a few months and a phone number change and talking to her friends before contact is established and I get to see my kid again. I’ve seen how worse the rules have gotten I’ve tried for over 20 years to be a dad. It does get frustrating.
Mine is so much diffrent my children are with md as a dad on and exparte because moms boyfriend is under investigation of sexualy assault of my 2 and 4 year old girls she never left him tryed to help financially or emotionally still with man under investigation kids are with me the father till november 20 th for final hearing
Thank u guys so much for taking ur time to do this I have a daughter I lost years back turned my life around and got my children back its been 4 yrs so my oldest lives with her dad she calls her step mom mom and called me allison for a while she still calls her step mom mom im trying super hard to be supportive for my daughter but I will admit sometimes its super hard to not let my feelings get in the way but I dont know what to do she completely ignores me when we are all together. Itd total heart crushing can u please help with some advice
What about when alcohol, drugs and one parent not being a legal resident in the U.S.A and a threat even when mad was given of ill just take off with child to my country so you can’t see them again or i was to take child on vacation to meet grandparents for me to be ready to return back without the child. How can i handle this with a Judge being actually afraid of this threats becoming true!
But what if the children are saying that dad is causing the bruises or is creating a negligent environment in which they get hurt (falling asleep for hours during custody time) and other like such things? But the (injuries) are not “bad enough” for the state to care? I was told by CYS verbatim: “He didn’t break her jaw so their is nothing we can do.” At the time our daughter was 7. Trying to bring this up in front of the judge yes the judge appears to turn off and assumes that I am just trying to paint dad in a bad light. If only one parent is working to try to coparent and the other is not doing anything but playing games then what can be done?
My wife literally hid my child from me at a “safe house” while she was filing for divorce and forcing kiddo to sleep in the same house as the next boyfriend. Keep in mind that the new boyfriend is almost the same age as my kids👀. Now, kiddo doesn’t want anything to do with her, wants to live with me permanently, mom hasn’t seen him in over 3 months, and hasn’t asked to but once. She is attempting to fight me for custody and doesn’t want to pay child support. She is wildly narcissistic and manipulative! If kiddo told me today that he wanted to see mom today, I’d make it happen! However, he doesn’t 🤷♂️. Never thought I’d be in this situation, but here we are!
I’ve got to tell you, things must be very different in the USA compared to here in Australia. It’s an open secret the courts favour the mum’s. The mother of my kids has been relentless in attacking me . All she has ever done is make up false allegations and the professionals are all over me like a rash .NO ONE has ever looked into her .I finally had enough and took her to court for extra time with our kids . The mother went into hysteria and ramped up her false allegations on me .The kids got interviewed by physiologist. The kids told the physiologist things about me, that were completely untrue . My 10 yr daughter even said, when I start menstruating I don’t want to go to dad’s, because he is controlling with money, I’m worried he won’t buy my sanitary needs . Apparently that wasn’t a red flag for a court appointed expert ( physiologist) . My kids are now 15yr and 12 yr .I’ve spent $75.000 on solicitors fighting for them .My kids now don’t speak to me or anyone on my side of the family . The mother managed to take out one half of a whole family .It’s been over 12 months since I spoke to the kids .I’m heart broken and financially screwed . It took the mother 10 years to reach her goal, but she got there in the end . I have been telling the professionals for 10 years, the mother has mental health issues NO ONE would listen to me .All she ever had to do was keep making up false allegations, and trust me those allegations were all followed up . Nothing was ever proved, because it never happened.
I haven’t filed for custody yet but I have removed my daughter from being in the same town as her father. She has not seen him in 2 years. This is because he is a heavy alcoholic, smoker, and drug user.. he is also mentally unstable to a certain extent. My fear, is that if I file for full custody that the judge will make my daughter have visitation times with her father even though he is into drugs and alcohol. He is extremely manipulative and I’m afraid he will twist things in order to see her..
I lost custody because I was hyper focused on the father who kept taking the kids against court orders and overriding and undermining my connection with them. My children were deliberately manipulated to hate me, slander me and avoid quality time. I am also focused because noone else is and he has 4 counts of felony charges, crime against a child my daughter’s age. I became enraged at him, and the judge… he’s the biggest ashole, to a criminal cult like later. She doesn’t care he never regarded court orders, never punished him for systematically aliniating the children. I was the only one to pay for an attorney.
Hello, my name is Cristina, I had my child out of wedlock). the judge granted me with sole physical custody, there were no papers that mention Sole LEgal custody. The non custodial parent is the father. So, my question is, even though the papers only says sole physical custody, does that still make me the legal custodian parent? Since it doesn’t mention legal in the papers Thank you
The judge just ordered me to have no contact wjth my child after I called an emergency hearing when my son said he was suicidal . His father said I was telling our son to do it and the judge made her ruling without a hearing and said I’m the undermining the fathers ability to parent… even tho my son is scared and traumatized and was forced to live with him. She is biased against me and won’t even hear my evidence. The father never presents evidence. I’m lost in what I can do and I fear for my sons safety.
My divorce was final last week and my ex moved across the country 2 days later even though we have a joint custody agreement in place. She got married over the weekend. she’s unstable never worked and is constantly making decisions on emotion. She also knows that it’s not my desire to pursue legal matter and she doesn’t think that I will.
Hello, I have a question. Can I have a custody if we are only separated not divorced yet? In our marriage things are not working out, so I’m trying to move out of the house, but he told me I can’t take our 4 years old daughter with me. The only thing is holding us back together is our daughter. I even suggested him other options such as some days she can spend time with me, and the other days with him, but categorically refused. He said I’m the one who wants to go, so I must not go with her.
God the Father Always works things out for His glory. That was thirty years ago. The children are all adults and I helped to raise my grandbabies. Joel Obsteen puts it this way, “when life throws you a Curve Ball, bounce it into the goal basket. It was hard to forgive him even after my mother-in-law asked me to take him back. Of course, I said no!
My ex and I have a weird custody agreement, I live 118 miles away and he gets her every other week Wednesday-Saturday. When she starts school he wants her every weekend or else he’s asking for full custody, is there a chance he can get it? Our custody states we can each move 200 miles away or less from eachother
We do not have a current custody order and me and my ex live in 2 different counties. The kids were going to school in my county for the past 10 years. 6 years in this current county. He has now kept them in cyber and I haven’t seen them in person for 64 days. I’m guessing I will definitely get them back but this is taking way too long. Mother’s Day is in a few days and he said he needs to ask his lawyer if the girls should see me. It’s sick. I’m waiting on a court hearing for an Expedited Answer and Counter Claim that I put in. It’s been 3 weeks since that.
There have been court orders put on me that I cannot in good conscience follow. Good parents who have not harmed their children should not have restraints put on them. There are worse things than losing custody of your child. I don’t play games with my daughter’s well-being. I would rather that she had been allowed to continue healthy relationships with both parents. I am not going to treat her like the rope in a tug of war.
My gf is pregnant, she is very unfit, she is an alcoholic and suffers mental issues, her alcohol intake has slowed but she is back to almost a liter a day. All her close companions are either in prison jail or heavily involved with meth, her history says enough to prove she is unfit as a parent. Her own children and her own parents can attest to what’s best for that child, either with me or adoption.
Me and my GF just moved from CA to NC in search of a better much more affordable lifestyle. We have a 7 month baby boy and want nothing but the best for him. In CA we where living with her moms now in NC we’re living with my parents. She decided that it’ll be better for us to move to NC sonner than what we had planned because she couldn’t put up with her mom and dad anymore there was always problems amongst them and it was affecting our relationship. So we made the move i resigned my job made some calls and bought our tickets to NC. She would always say that moving in with my parents would better our relationship and we wouldn’t be putting up with her families drama in CA and it wouldn’t be toxic. Now that we’re here in NC we found jobs and my parents love and care for my son and my GF . my mom always going above and beyond for us, cooking and cleaning for us and caring for my son which is something I’ve never felt from her family side and im happy here in NC. Long story short I’ve started to notice a change in her like she’s always on her phone or sometimes it looks like she’s mad and won’t talk to anybody which makes it awkward because my family is full of joy and happiness. I brought it up to her attention and all hell broke loose started saying that im wrong for saying such things and that she’s been doing everything for my son. So we stepped out the house because I didn’t want my parents to hear us arguing so i had my mom look after my son and she told me exactly how shes been feeling lately, and how she doesnt feel the same for me anymore.
What do I do when its the father who has done all these things. I feel victimized everytime I go to court because he is saying horrible things to my kids then go to court to say I’m the one doing this. I keep letting the court know I’m not the one and I’m made out to look like a liar. He gets aways with not following our court orders and now aleinated my kids from me. He has them avoid me (walk past me with no eye contact or respond to me when I try to talk to them or give them a hug) during our separation and after the divorce was final up until present. He told my kids they don’t have to go to my house when they turned 12 years old and manipulated them to make the children believe I don’t love them, I’m a “bad” mom, I’m poor, they won’t amount to anything if they stay at my house. He remarried and has his new wife talk bad about me all the time to my children. They live in a more expensive town in CT and bought a big house. He has harassed me with wellness checks from his police friends and DCF reports twisting anything he wishes to try to make me look like I’m abusive with my children. Why can’t the courts see the truth when it comes to narcissistic fathers? I need HELP PLEASE!!!!
what if moms in jail for 2 years for drug addiction and robbery, but great grandma took the boy when he was 4m old without telling you and took legal guardianship as well. even tho we pay a TON in child support she hates our guts. my husband never had a chance to take care of his child. we gotta wait till she dies, right? especially in a conservative state….
The court is allowing the alienation to take place. It’s frustrating, I’ve been without my son for almost two years now and the court is sitting on their collective asses about it. “Oh you just need supervision” to “oh you just need reunification therapy”. I as the father have to jump through all of these hoops and pay for everything while the mother just sits back and collects her child support checks
This info is inaccurate if the other parent sincerely is pathological. In my divorce, I had one son I wouldn’t rip away from his dad. Not good enough for dad. He wanted full power to keep abusing, scare me, get tax benefits from and used the power to threaten me that he would apply for child support when he made more than I. In some ways, it was a mistake to do 50/50. Attorneys told me as mother to take full custody, but I did what was best for my child, and he used that to reverse roles on me by completely making up unconscionable things, like I needed psychiatric help, had delusions. This guy stole $10k from my parents initiating the downfall to divorce. I couldn’t believe someone would go that to their in laws. Now I’d be faulted with saying anything??? Maybe if I was trying to get 100% custody and saying his wrongs, but otherwise, this advice is garbage. He slandered against me in untrue ways, limped his own self, won, which left my sin begging me “mommy please fix this”, “I just want 50/50.” I know have ptsd from this experience – I love my don so much I’d never take him away from his dad, who turned out to have pathological tendencies mixed with humor and charm. A dichotomy I didn’t know EXISTED.
my ex was perusal my sons when I was having surgery, and he then turned and sued me for custody and wont allow my sons to talk to me, and proceeded to berate me to them so much that my son called me an ugly name last night and now don’t want to come home. I am lost and the police can’t help or won’t because he filed custody suit. He isn’t even a biological parent.
daughter is married,her husband provoked her with an arguement/pushed her into wall,she got scared and slapped him. problem is police, dhs are not taking/writing/listening to her side of story. Her lawyer is helping, but dhs is coming again to talk to her again, 10 yr son was at school, 15 yr old saw it all. Her 1 yr son is now living with her ex to be, as there is a no contact order. DHS is sending a report back as founded. lawyer is trying to prove self defense but Iowa law is unforgiving. Now it looks like she will lose everything which are her sons and she is 23 weeks pregnant. 10 yrs old dad is a supreme narcissist, hes constantly calling dhs for really dumb things.
And how about this? a mother who has full custody and parental authority because the child was born out of marriage, a separation occurs and the mother leaves the child living with the father and it has been more than 10 months that the father who does not have custody is being charge of the child and provide everything the child needs. the mother is not looking for her daughter, she barely ask for her, she does not pay child support and 4 months have passed without seeing her daughter. What do you think of this situation? Do you think the court can give me the full custodyof my daughter?
I have a friend who has a daughter about 4 yrs old and he hasn’t been able to see his child for a year or 2 now because the mother won’t allow him to he has no communication with the mother of his child because she and her current boyfriend who used to be friends with the father refuse to allow him to see his child not even pictures not even the grandmother on the mother’s side can see her grandchildren because shes supporting the father he wants to get custody of his daughter but he suffers from seizures caused by stress he is also trying to be in a better living situation and have more money saved before going to court I’m just curious if anyone has any advice on what he should/could do because hes a great father and it tares him apart every day knowing he cant see his daughter it’s a very sad situation I know who he is as a person and I have met the mother of his child and she has always seemed so full of herself and acts like shes untouchable it makes me feel like there is nothing he can do and I know he feels the same any advice would be great
so what happens If the mom tries to tell the dad about the child but is bullied by the parent’s of the father into keeping quiet about the child and years later said dad finds out can mom lose her child if the father never knew to begin with it was a story I read on Reddit the dad wanted to permanently remove the kid and never let her see her kid again as a form of revenge for her not telling him about their child so what would you do in that case
How you don’t focus on dad’s bad behaviors when his abusing the children? How you don’t speak bad about him? May I say to my child, I am sorry that dad did this to you. This is a awful behavior. May I speak out the truth at court without beeing seen as a overprotective mother? May I effectively protect my children when needed? Or do I have to shut up and accept anything?
Got the DV for stalking.. Now his atty is calling me saying that he can pick up on my private gated community with other people but the judge said only him to come. I can’t allow anyone but him to come at the appointed times. His atty is harassing me on this as he drove in with someone in his car I was not aware and I reported to the guard gate only he can come. He got mad and called his atty. He said he will report me to the judge?? For not letting him and the other person pick up our child when the judge said only him.. Is his 1st time picking him up.. The other person waited on the curb he received our child. It’s too much to make them respect the judge. Also, his girlfriend was calling me and cursing ME. It’s too much. Now someone is using my name opening credit and trying to buy a car since I broke it off. Lots of id theft. The LAPD asked me if I have an ex..I don’t want to go there… But his girlfriend was the one that contacted me to tell me about herself (I didn’t know) and later got ugly with me. I don’t like the feeling i get from this. My mom says she is worried for me and feels they are acting dangerous. She says they seen to want something.. More than the baby.
I have a custody battle I filed She abandoned him no call no text no come over for 3 n half months and she was oddly my neighbor when we split and then I moved away but prior to that she had drugs in her home meth etc I got a pfa on her and her man And was told by someone working with the system up where I lived that I could move if there is no custody in place so I did and now im going to court and have all this evidence against her and on top of that she doesnt even have her first child and hasnt even went to visit in 5 years
What if the father is constantly attacking the mother in court and brings up irrelevant issues regarding child custody. When the mother clarify’s and provide factual evidence to the judge, the judge still ignores the mother. In addition, the judge has twisted the mother’s words and ridiculed her. How can a mother defend herself when she is constantly being attacked in court? Especially after complying with court orders. The father on the other hand has lied about things and ignores court orders all the time. Can the judge be held liable for being biased in this case?
Im a mother of 8 years old. And my daughter is illigitemate child. She was raise by my mother but i supported her even if its not consistent since my job is on and off.i got my daughter on july 2020 but my mother take my child last nov.17,2020 without asking permission while im at work.and the decision of the social worker is that the custody must be at my mother and sister..because the child was raised by them..please tell me what to do..
I bet you at least half of the cases where a mother has diahhrea of the mouth about the dad, and it isn’t about cheating or just focusing on being hurt thatbthey want to leave her.. it is because she has been pushed past the limits of her normal character by a narcissist or other toxic abusive other parent, and she knows damn well they are lying about her and just recycling everything she has been begging them to realise about their abusive behaviour for a while. Twisting it onto her. Methodically driving her to the point of doing ANYTHING that he can use to say she is unfit. It is disgusting that the court officials aren’t trained enough to spot trauma responses and abusive manipulation tactics from a mile away. But then again a lot only care about money, and not really about doing the right thing anyway. I understand if she is making it solely about the other parents life choices outside of parenting or normal expectations of raising kids with another person, but the fact that showing emotion in court = crazy is appalling. That’s why women who are victims have to do everything they can to emotionally detach themselves FROM THEIR ONGOING TRAUMA so they can stand a chance of keeping their kids as protected from psychological abuse as possible. Custody court is highly traumatizing and scary for any parent. Yet showing any sign of it, you lose points and fall to your knees sobbing because someone who has never been present for any of it makes their call on what THEY think. That isn’t justice.
The mediator, my lawyer and the at litem said “i hope we get somethign signed today because you hae judge ** and her MO is to take fathers custody, even though I ( at litem ) am for you having 50/50 or more and be the custodial parent judge ** will not care, She wont care about your evidence if she even lets it in” all 3 of them were agreeing and talking trash about this judge and how bad she is to fathers.
I need a help,if you could please help me out with it. So my best friend she is on a verge of divorce,her husband is a narcissist and curses her and puts her through mental pressures and pains and they have a 6 years old kid who needs special care,they are over 10 years in this marriage,and she is the housewife and he is the one who works,as she couldn’t take it she and her son stayed apart from him for a time being and still his behaviour seems to worsen and made her want a divorce,but she is scared about the child custody,her child loves her and stays with her but she is scared about him getting the custody as he was the one providing economically. What are your views? Please.
I’m 12 weeks pregnant.. not married and when my baby is born I do not want my boyfriend to have joint custody at all. He is a marijuana user DAILY, has also used LSD and Molly in the past. I have article evidence of him saying “I have wanted to kill people since I was 10 years old” while yelling at me in the car. He also is on anti depressants and has anger issues. Do I have a good chance to win full custody??? I NEED HELP
In Boulder Colorado a woman could be articletaped setting her children on fire and father would be the one that go to jail because that’s Boulder Colorado. If you are perusal this and you are a man from Boulder Colorado understand that these two gentlemen are giving great advice, but there is no way under the sun you will ever win under any circumstances
But what if there are REAL concerns with the other parent. History of assault, etc. How does a woman express REAL concerns without a judge “getting annoyed” or seeing her as being “hyperfocused” on the father. Can a judge determine exaggerations vs truth? What I’m hearing is if a mother speaks up about anything negative about the father, she risks losing custody of children, and putting them in harm, and if she doesn’t speak up about concerns she has with the children being in the father’s custody, she also risks the children being in harm. What’s the middle ground here? What options do mothers have to protect their children from harmful situations? I get what you’re saying about some situations and mothers just “wanting their way”. But what about when it’s more than that. When there is actual concern for harm to the children. What do you do?
Have you worked cases dealing with a narcissist parent.? Things doesn’t work with those kind of parents. Please if you have any suggestion how to deal with them and protect the children and the other parent that can be helpful in court please, share that information to the public. It will be helpful for those that are dealing with. Please
What if you are so consistently irritated and annoyed by the position you are consistently put into with repeatedly being blamed and alienated by the other parent for little insignificant nit picking. Also, what if the court orders are not necessarily being disobeyed, but interpreted as you having sole custody and the right to make the end decision. Orders can be ambiguous and poorly written to make contempt impossible to prevent when one parent wants to create repeated problems that affect everyone involved negatively financially, emotionally, mentally, and physically (having money to pay bills and stay employed instead of the opposite).
What about if you are dealing with a straight up abuser. Like he was charged with domestic abuse and I currently have a restraining order against him. Should I not care about his “imperfection” and be humbly open to improvement for myself? Just saying. There’s sometimes a reason why moms are concerned.
Is it right or wrong for a mother to have her children kidnapped from daycare, and forced into dependency case if the entire case is based on allegations? The facts: mother has never signed a contract/ case plan, and mother has never been arrested/ charged for these serious criminal allegations of child abuse. #whereisthejustice #bringmykidshome #justiceforGeneva
My husband ex waited 7 years to let him know n to get a DNA test to prove he was the father. She’s does not let him see his son. He been paying $800 in child support and we been sending gifts and cards to him but she is now filed for Abandonment and is trying to get her 21 year boyfriend to be the adopted father. We don’t know what to do at this point? We can’t afford a lawyer because we just Bought a house and with his $800 child support payment a month it’s hard to even live. We need help ! TN state.
Is it exaggerating if your child voices that things are happening to them and your the only one to defend them and help them. What is missing here? Did she get bad energy from me, is my daughter having troubles at dads home, help me understand why my daughter would say these things and how I handle them 🤷🏽♀️