How Might Play Strengthen The Bonds Between Parents And Children?

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Research studies have shown that play between a parent and child is one of the best ways to strengthen the parent-child relationship. Engaging in child-directed play is an effective tool for building strong relationships, adding joy, vitality, and resilience to relationships. Play can heal resentments, disagreements, and hurt, and prepare children for adult life, including roles as parents, professionals, and civic responsibility.

Play activities are designed to strengthen the connection between parent and child through engaging, fun, and meaningful interactions. These activities range from simple games to shared experiences, all aimed at building trust and a lasting connection. Free play is the key to promoting children’s healthy growth and learning, and it provides a stress-busting experience. Recognizing the psychological benefits of play, understanding diverse forms of play, and overcoming associated barriers can significantly contribute to their child’s emotional development.

In February, let’s celebrate the power of strengthening parent-child relationships through play. By engaging in simple acts of play, you can nurture love, empathy, and joy within your family. Play therapy interventions are appropriate for supporting children throughout the healing and self-discovery process.

Play builds physical, intellectual, and social-emotional skills, helping children communicate and learn by engaging in self-motivated, pretend play. Research has supported the power of play time and the bonds between parent and child are built and made stronger when playing together. The interactions that occur through play tell children that parents are fully paying attention to them and help build enduring relationships.

Play helps children develop social skills and self-control, and research shows that incorporating play therapy techniques can strengthen parent-child relationships, improve communication skills, and foster curiosity, self-regulation skills, language development, and imagination.

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Healthy parent-child relationships are built through playPlay strengthens your relationship with your child and helps him WANT to cooperate with you, which makes the whole evening go more smoothly.mother.ly
What Is Parent-Child Play And Why Is It So Important For …Many research studies have found that play between a parent and child is one of the best ways to strengthen the parentchild relationship.bcparent.ca
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📹 8 Ways to Improve Parent Child Relationship

How do you have a better relationship with your parents? How as parents can you have a better relationship with your child?


What Are The Power Of Play For Adults
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What Are The Power Of Play For Adults?

Play is a vital aspect of adult life, providing joy, reducing stress, and enhancing both mental and physical well-being. Engaging in playful activities, such as hobbies, exercise, or sports, can lead to a range of benefits, including improved life satisfaction and stronger social connections. Research highlights that playtime fosters creativity, enhances problem-solving skills, and fuels imagination, making it essential for mental health. Moreover, participating in playful interactions can heal grievances and strengthen relationships, while also serving as a source of relaxation.

Play is instrumental in lowering cortisol levels, the primary stress hormone, effectively managing stress. By engaging in playful experiences, adults can reconnect with their sense of novelty, cultivate optimism, and boost their immune systems. It serves not only as a fun activity but also as a transformative tool, encouraging mindfulness and resetting the busy adult mind. Ultimately, prioritizing play leads to improved cognitive functions, social bonds, and a greater sense of joy in daily life. Adults must embrace play to cultivate creativity, enhance productivity, and cultivate a fulfilling life.

How Do You Support Children Through Play
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How Do You Support Children Through Play?

Making time for daily play is crucial for children's development. Parents and caregivers should not direct play but rather allow children to choose their activities and encourage outdoor play. Engaging in playtime with children fosters connection and fun while promoting skill development. Play is vital for brain structure and function, supporting synapse connections and enhancing brain plasticity. It improves planning, organization, social interactions, and emotional regulation, while also aiding in language, math, and coping mechanisms for stress.

Moreover, play helps children become lifelong learners and supports their overall development. Despite challenges in advocating for play-based approaches, research highlights its effectiveness in enhancing children’s well-being. Through play, children learn to share, take turns, and cooperate in groups, practicing essential social skills. Adults can facilitate this by ensuring ample time for open-ended play, providing engaging materials, and fostering imaginative thinking.

A child-centered play environment, free from excessive stimulation, allows for safe exploration and development of physical and social-emotional skills. Ultimately, regular play with parents lowers the likelihood of anxiety, depression, aggression, and sleep issues in children, emphasizing the importance of play in their lives.

Why Is Play Important For Children
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Why Is Play Important For Children?

Play is vital for children's growth, fostering joy, resilience, and healing. It helps build trust and safe relationships, enhancing both brain development and physical health. Engaging in play strengthens cognitive, social, emotional, and physical skills, providing children with essential tools for learning and interacting. Through play, children develop executive function, emotional regulation, and independence while exploring their creativity and imagination.

Research indicates that play enhances children’s planning, organization, social skills, and language abilities, ultimately promoting their overall well-being. It offers a safe environment for children to experiment with their emotions and learn about themselves and the world around them. As they play, children learn to navigate relationships, solve problems, and manage stress. Play encourages open-ended exploration and self-directed activities, leading to powerful learning experiences across various developmental areas.

As noted by Piaget, play is a critical process for lifelong learning. Therefore, it is essential to recognize the significance of play in nurturing children’s development, fostering confidence, collaboration, and empathy, while enriching their emotional health and social interactions.

How Does Play Help Children Communicate
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How Does Play Help Children Communicate?

Play is essential for children's development, enhancing their speech, thinking abilities, confidence, and social interactions within families and society. It expands vocabulary and supports language acquisition by encouraging children to decipher meanings and observe cues. Play fosters communication skills through shared experiences, enabling back-and-forth interactions. It promotes social and emotional skills, emotional intelligence, and the joy of active learning.

Research indicates that play encourages children to practice learned language skills, refine speech sounds by interacting with peers and adults, and develop across all domains: social, emotional, cognitive, self-help, and motor skills. It teaches communication, cooperation, problem-solving, and perspective-taking, all crucial for success in school and life.

By exploring their environment and expressing feelings through imaginative play, children learn to articulate thoughts and actively listen. Engaging in play enhances the understanding of non-verbal cues, leading to better interpersonal skills. Ultimately, play serves as a powerful tool for cognitive growth and social development, helping children learn decision-making and problem-solving skills while interacting with their world.

Paying attention to children's verbal and non-verbal play can reveal their inner thoughts, proving that play not only stimulates curiosity and self-regulation but also nurtures language development and creativity.

What Is The Main Purpose Of Role Play
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What Is The Main Purpose Of Role Play?

Role playing offers numerous benefits for students, providing real-world scenarios that facilitate the acquisition of vital skills such as negotiation, teamwork, and critical observation of peers. The main goal of role play is to create a safe space for participants to explore various behaviors, enhance problem-solving abilities, and deepen their understanding of subjects. This method fosters creativity, communication skills, self-esteem, and physical development in children.

Role-playing is an engaging educational tool that promotes active participation in the learning process and helps learners adapt to real-world situations. It allows students to view material from new perspectives, enhancing critical thinking and motivating them in a fun manner. Additionally, role-playing can significantly improve language skills, encouraging confidence in using the target language. This pedagogical approach facilitates learning through practical experience and encourages learners to engage with complex subjects.

Role-playing exercises are particularly effective in achieving objectives across cognitive, affective, and behavioral domains. Overall, role play is integral to active learning, allowing students to transcend rote learning by actively engaging with the content and experiences relevant to their studies and future real-world applications.

Why Is Play Important In A Parent-Child Relationship
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Why Is Play Important In A Parent-Child Relationship?

Play is a vital aspect of the parent-child relationship, providing a chance for parents and young children to connect and experience joy together. Engaging in playful interactions not only enhances the fun but also offers emotional benefits, fostering strong bonds built on trust and well-being. Unstructured playtime, whether with siblings or independently, carries numerous advantages, with parent-child play being particularly impactful. It contributes significantly to children's cognitive, physical, social, and emotional development.

The American Academy of Pediatrics emphasizes the importance of play in supporting healthy brain development and overall well-being. Despite busy schedules, prioritizing playtime is crucial, as it strengthens the parent-child relationship and promotes self-esteem, skill acquisition, and learning about the world. Notably, play enhances communication skills and emotional regulation, thereby enabling children to articulate their feelings better and navigate social interactions.

Research, including the work of Faith Jones '23, underscores the role of play in shaping family dynamics and emphasizes the importance of parental involvement in play. Overall, play not only nurtures children's growth but also enhances parents' well-being, making it a beneficial practice for families. Encouraging play helps build lasting relationships, supporting children's development and fostering a positive parenting environment.

What Is The Most Important Relationship To A Child
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What Is The Most Important Relationship To A Child?

The most critical relationship for a child is with their parent or caregiver, fundamentally shaping their understanding of the world. This bond provides the love, security, and emotional safety children require as they grow. Positive interactions foster development by teaching children essential skills like communication and social interaction. The quality of attachment to caregivers significantly influences a child's emotional and social growth.

Parenting styles vitalize these relationships, reinforcing the necessity for parents to express affection regularly. Simple daily moments shared together are invaluable for nurturing this connection. Children thrive when they perceive their parents as loving and supportive, particularly during formative years.

The parental bond lays a solid foundation of trust that impacts everything from cognitive abilities to self-esteem. In addition to parental relationships, connections with siblings and peers also contribute to a child’s overall development. Encouraging a harmonious parental relationship not only supports the child's growth but models healthy relationships for them to emulate. As parents and caregivers provide love, guidance, and encouragement, they cultivate environments where children can explore, learn, and flourish.

Ultimately, by prioritizing these relationships, parents significantly enhance their children’s emotional well-being and social success, underscoring the importance of the parent-child dynamic in shaping capable and confident individuals.

What Is The Importance Of Parent Child Interaction
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What Is The Importance Of Parent Child Interaction?

Parent-child interaction is crucial for a child's development, fostering communication and social skills. Engaging in play together helps children feel valued and supported. Parents can enhance learning by incorporating educational moments during routine activities, like preparing for school or bath time. The quality of early parent-child relationships significantly influences a child's socioemotional, cognitive, and health outcomes. Positive interactions lead to adaptive development, while secure attachments lay the foundation for happy, independent adulthood.

Responsive exchanges with caregivers stimulate brain development and promote resilience, aiding children's ability to cope with challenges. As children grow, healthy parent-infant interactions contribute to executive functioning, attention control, and overall well-being. High-quality interactions reduce conflict and malice, serving as protective factors against emotional difficulties. Evidence-based programs like Parent-Child Interaction Therapy guide parents in improving interactions for children with behavioral challenges.

Additionally, research highlights that involved parents enhance children's literacy and math skills. Strong parent-child relationships are linked to positive engagement with peers and improved academic performance. Ultimately, nurturing mutual communication fosters confidence among family members and establishes enduring social skills that benefit children's future relationships. This relational health perspective underscores the lifelong impact of these early interactions on children's holistic development.

What Does Play Add To Relationships
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What Does Play Add To Relationships?

Play enhances relationships by infusing them with joy, vitality, and resilience, helping to heal resentments and disagreements. For children, play fosters trust and safety, while for couples, it is a vital tool for developing stronger bonds. Research indicates that playfulness contributes to building trust, increasing intimacy, reducing conflict, and promoting effective communication in intimate relationships. Psychologist Rene Proyer highlights that playfulness not only enhances communication but also boosts happiness and relationship longevity.

Incorporating play into relationships is essential, particularly during times of social distancing, as it helps reconnect partners and alleviate stress. Play fosters vulnerability and expression, allowing couples to balance negativity and reinforce positive experiences. Engaging in playful attitudes and behaviors can significantly enhance bonding, communication, and conflict resolution.

Moreover, parallel play—participating in solo activities together—can strengthen connections. Fantasy and roleplay can also serve as enjoyable and healthy ways for couples to navigate desires and boundaries safely. Ultimately, integrating more play into our lives enriches relationships and boosts both productivity and happiness, making its incorporation essential for lasting partnerships.


📹 Why Is Play Important In The Parent-Child Relationship?

Have you ever wondered why is play important in the parent-child relationship? Some parents may forget to prioritize time with …


Freya Gardon

Hi, I’m Freya Gardon, a Collaborative Family Lawyer with nearly a decade of experience at the Brisbane Family Law Centre. Over the years, I’ve embraced diverse roles—from lawyer and content writer to automation bot builder and legal product developer—all while maintaining a fresh and empathetic approach to family law. Currently in my final year of Psychology at the University of Wollongong, I’m excited to blend these skills to assist clients in innovative ways. I’m passionate about working with a team that thinks differently, and I bring that same creativity and sincerity to my blog about family law.

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  • As I’ve been growing as a teen I see myself distancing myself from my parents. I feel like I can’t talk to them about my problems and that they don’t understand me. I love gaming and talking with friends online but my parents think it’s b/s. Playing games is an amazing past time for me and makes me feel happy, but they always say “go outside” or “get off that laptop.” I understand that taking time away from technology is good and I’ve been making sure that I take the dog for walks during the day, walking to friend’s houses and the weekends and such, but I feel as though they only see the bad side of the internet rather than the side I enjoy.

  • My parents and I have a pretty good relationship; I love them and they love me. But sometimes, they’re too overprotective and stubborn. They don’t listen to me and what I want, instead thinking that they know what is best for me. I also don’t ever tell them anything, it’s like I physically can’t. I have trust issues with them but I’m not sure why. I’m not good at communicating with them and most of the time I don’t want to because I know they probably won’t listen to me. I don’t know what I should do to fix this.

  • Me and my mom’s relationship is super healthy. Even if we both have bad days we talk to each other about it. And even though I’m 16 and my mom is 53 we still make time for snuggles if we both are upset or just need someone. We talk all the time and it’s awesome. I’m so close to my mom than my other sisters. It’s even better cause for me I’ve never wanted or seen the need to be popular or feel peer pressure. I wear a lot of vintage clothing and unique clothing like my mom. We are honestly the same person if you think about it. Expect I’m pansexual but mostly gay. She loves me for who I am. I’m so lucky to have her.

  • As someone is actually already has a heathly relationship with my parents, I’m glad to see stuff like this. There often is a mix of teens/parents complaining about the other party when in all reality simple things can help improve respect which in turn improves relationship. Love these articles, keep up the hard work.

  • I have never hugged or been hugged, or shown affection by my parents. My mom is a narcissist, and doesn’t care about me at all. I also have a language barrier with my parents, because I wasn’t taught how to speak their language and grew up with my aunt who spoke English. My grandma taught me a little bit, but my language will never be enough for me to have a proper conversations with my parents. I hate not being able to understand my family, and my parents blame me for not growing up to automatically know the language. I am convinced my parents hate me, but they love my siblings because they buy food, and clothes for them. They always leave to go anywhere without me, and my mom constantly threatens to leave me because I’m so stupid and dumb, and can’t do anything right. I feel worthless in my house because I cannot speak, I cannot understand, and I am not close to anyone in my own house. And this is just one problem I have with my family.

  • My dad is my best friend. Sounds like I am a loser, but we are so alike that we just like talking every day about music, news and even tv. I wouldn’t change these talks we have, I think they are essential to my day. Edit: I am sorry not everyone has this with their parents, and I consider myself lucky. I know all of you will find someone who loves and support you. You deserve it!

  • I feel like my relationship with my parents have froze already – I do not talk about any of the things that make me happy because later on my parents would and will use it against me, so when I do something close to my heart I will not let them see it, I want to keep those things positive on me. I wish my parents could have been like this on my teenage years, my parents also insulted my physical appeareance and insulted my shyness and insecurity, I have learned to get over them with supportive friends and boyfriend though, but I think only time and a little distance for now helps to cool things off, let them see that I’m an adult and not a child. There is one event actually that I remember forever from my mother. My mother got very mad at me at why am I shy and why don’t I talk to them, so on our way home she explained to me very madly how that when we get home, we will practise speaking together over dinner and practise job interviews and whatsoever, as a shy girl who did not want to talk to their parents, they dragged my self confidence to lowest possible with this.

  • I feel really lucky to have the great parents I do, me and my dad sing together, watch shows together, and play together, he is always supportive and encourages me to do good. My mom is also extremely supportive, understanding, caring and loving, we spend lots of time together and I can always talk to her about anything, thank god for letting me have these great parents!

  • My parents told me they loved me when i was 3, ive never heard those words from them again. They have made me gain anxiety and blame me for it, all my friends say that they will open to me but they havent. Ive hugged them, made sure they were ok and done chores so they wont be in pain. They’ve just broke me

  • I remember when I found out my mother wasn’t just a mom. She was her own human being who felt all kinds of different things and reacted differently to certain situations. The day I realized that I was able to forgive and let go of much hurt. I also learned some parents never had the parents we wish they could have been.

  • when i was little, i used to hate hugging my parents before sleep or after school or whatever times that are right cause my teachers used to say ‘you should have your own personal space’ so i did and that’s what leaded me to ‘hate hugging my parents or anyone’ now that i know what the teachers actually mean (im 12 btw) it is ok to hug someone cause it’s more like heaven than ever

  • Any tips on how to get through to my brother that thinks the best way to teach his teenage child is to have one-sided lectures and/or arguments? The last time I tried to talk to him he ended up yelling at me. Which at least distracted him from my niece, but certainly wasn’t a productive conversation :/

  • The difficulty I have with my parents- and family in general is that after telling them a reason for something, or what is wrong- I feel like nothing can be done about it, or that nothing will be. I think part of it is that I’m not what they expected of their first child growing up into a teenager- I don’t want to argue with them, I don’t want to rant and moan about how they “never let me do anything” or how “so and so does it, why can’t I?” a lot of the time I just want to have mutual understanding between me and another person. And I may be wrong- but I do feel like while I make a constant effort to (even though I do seem patronizing when I do it) accept their opinions and views and listen to them- even when I feel strongly about what they are saying, they don’t do the same. That or I just have a lack of understanding of it- I find it hard to read my parents. And I can tell that they find it equally as difficult to read me, but I don’t know what to do- and rather then offer solutions, I tend just to recoil into silence and let things carry on because I’m still a child and the parents knows better, that and I’m afraid of holding onto and building up an idea of how whatever issue can be “fixed”, telling them and it being shot down- without people realizing quite how strongly I felt about it.

  • This article and reading the comments helps me to understand things a lot better. Hate to say that my relation to my parents is already broken for years and I dont believe it will ever be fixed. As in most cases it started when I became a teenager (Ill be 20 this year) My parents really never understand me (I know everybody says that but its true) They never listen to me nor take/took me seriosuly – I know they are right when they say “You never talk to us anyway”. But did they ever think about why I really really hate talking to them ? When I always tell them “leave me alone” (because I am sad/depressed, angry or anxious) they never listen ! But are insulted and act like they are the victim and I am the oh-so-bad ungrateful child. Because they “are always there for me amd do everything for me” and I “just never realise that”. When I told my parents that I wanted to leave school, they and teachers were against it (I changed school in the end but after years at the worst timing ever. It changed my live amd I regret it – but thats another story) My parents also told (and still do ot at times) what job etc I shall do – especially when I had no idea of my future. I really wonder where they get their crazy ideas from. I can kinda sorta understand that… lately, they act like this: See me once having fun doing sth new or talking about 1 single topic I learned in school (even though I suck at that subject/never cared aboiut it before), tell me to become this or that. WTF ? I can at least understand where that idea comes from.

  • I envy you people who have a good relationship with your parents… mine got arrested for drugs when I was 9, and even 7 years later they’re total shitbags. I currently live with my grandparents, and our relationship is nowhere close to healthy. Whenever I’m feeling sad or angry or hurt, I always get brushed off as “dramatic”, and whenever I’m tired or stressed out, they don’t give a shit. They always want what they want done right when they ask, and they show a blatant disregard for my life and my feelings. I’ve cried in front of them plenty of times, and all they’ve done is stare… no hugs, no apologies, none of that. I’m apparently always in the wrong for ever wanting time for myself and not wanting to devote my entire life to doing the housework. I wish I understood what I did wrong… I used to love them. They used to bring me to their house on the weekend when I still lived with my parents. Where did I mess up…? I probably shouldn’t be venting in the YouTube comments section lmao I just wish I knew how I screwed up to make things this way

  • TW: suicide My dad is manipulative and has really bad anger issues. He is so incredibly controlling. About 75% of my memories of us is him screaming at me in my room, ripping things apart, breaking things, my mom sitting next to us and me crying, screaming and hitting myself. I ended up attempting suicide at the young age of 12 because i couldnt take it any more . My mom has a huge victim complex. She thinks there is nothing wrong with her and that her ideas are better than everyone elses (except for my dad since he absolutely ruins her self confidence) I am 15 years old and have an older sister who is 19. My sister was always the golden child. She did everything my parents told her ever since she was a toddler. Even in her teenage years, she stayed quiet for most of the time and just told herself to be patient. She knew that if she did that for long enough, she would gain their trust, they would see her efforts and try changing themselves. She did not want to do anything to hurt or dissapoint them. She is now in university. And then there is me, i am a very vocal person. I am neurodivergent, queer and i am very emotional (not as in me always being sad but my emotions changing quickly and me feeling them in extremes) I developed many mental health issues like ed’s,horrible anxiety and depression but unlike my sister, i cannot stay quiet. If something happens i am able to go against my parents. It effected my mental health even worse but afer tons of arguements, it ended up changing my parents slightly (which was more than i ever hoped for) .

  • thanks for making this article, i’m trying to improve my relationship with one of my parents because I’m growing apart from them. to the rest of you guys, you don’t deserve the bad treatment your parents show towards you, and I’m here for you. focus on improving yourself, even if it doesn’t please your parents, because when you become a thriving young adult, you won’t need them anymore. ilysm you all ❤

  • My relationship with my dad has none of this, actually he does exactly what your not supposed to do. Between him always having to be the good guy and making me out to be the bad guy to stuff like isolating me though I honestly rather have the isolate me then him trying to talk to me about stuff that makes me really uncomfortable. Also it really irritates me as I have no opinion or decisions on much of anything between my dad, step mom, and grandma it’s all about them and what they wanna do and the times they actually let me decide what I wanna do they need constant praise for it. Then another thing is if he wants attention especially in the car he literally goes all up in your face and start poking me well he’s driving, he did this for almost a hour nonstop once. Then there is the fact of they constantly steal stuff from me that I value and if I try confronting them the blame gets shifted onto me and they say I lost my stuff and it’s my fault and they were perfectly innocent. Another thing is my dad and step mom always talks behind my back what is worse is I pretty much can always hear them, like the one time my dad was complaining to one of his friends because I was to “picky” picking out my swimsuit. Yes we had to go to three different stores but that is because I’m very uncomfortable with two piece swimsuits and anything that shows or that looks similar to a dress or skirt, but not like I even wanted to go shopping either. Hell, I hated it even more then he did. Then after that he started complaining to me and wanting praise for something I didn’t wanna do and was bugged and paranoid enough to agree on going.

  • My dad doesn’t respect that I’m an independent person and don’t hold his beliefs. He sees me as the perfect little girl I was, but I’m not like that anymore. He rufuses to listen to my perspective, so I really don’t talk to him besides showing him my art, because he always encourages me in that department. I just wish he would listen and try to help me when I come to him with my problems instead of arguing or waving it off.

  • My father left when I was very young because my mother wouldn’t move to my home country with him. I haven’t seen him since and hoping to see him this summer. My mother and I had a difficult time a lot. My mother had 2 boyfriends. The first one was an alcoholic and we had to live with him for years. Once they split up she found a man. He was actually good to her and my sister. There’s nothing wrong with him. But my step brothers, the older one is 17 and a total douche. Both of them are the worst. I have to do the house chores and they don’t. I have strict rules and they don’t. I hate it. I just wish my mother would just split up so we can move back to Ireland. Since we had to move to Germany to stay with the new man.i hate my life here. It’s unfair and school is going bad. And I can’t even complain when my step brother hits me. He touched me before but never got under the clothes. I hate my life here, I just wanna go back . I don’t want to stay here If you read it to this far, thank you so much. You didn’t have to read my story but I thank you.

  • When it comes to my oldest kids I feel that I am a terrible mother. Our relationship is okay But has been hard of course. They don’t want to talk to much anymore. I feel so lost and im trying to get to know more about how they feel and what they truly need of me now. I keep a healthy distanc but i feel they truly take advantage of it sometime. I mostly get pushed away and it truly dose hurt. I sometimes feel like giving up is the only way, even though it wont do anything to build the relationship. I hope things change they are both adults now. I just hope they dont decided to just stop all together. It has changed so much now. I don’t know what to do. I’ve asked about it and they ignore it. I dont know what to do.

  • I have a very hard time with my parents… My mom tells me “stop being a brat”, “you’re so disrespectful”, ” you don’t do anything”, “stop staying in ur room”, “why won’t you talk to me!?”, “i won’t buy or get you anything anymore!”, “stop embarrassing me”, “why can’t you be like your little sister?”, “you don’t deserve anything”, “your 13 you should get up and do everything by urself”. I don’t know why she thinks I’ll give her hugs… All she does is put me down and hurt me… When I say she does those things she doesn’t care… She says I need to get help all the time, I can’t give her my love like she wants… I don’t even know how to tell her that I love her because I get to afraid like I’ll trust her to not hurt my feelings or out me down and she does… I need help, any tips anyone?

  • Mom: why dont you feel like you can trust me?? Ofc you can, tell me anything!! Me: Well, whenever I try to open up to you I personally feel like you just shut me down, yell at me, or just laugh and make the situation worse, and I end up thinking “why did I do that, I already knew it would’ve made everything worse” ((90 percent of my life my parents will never know)) Mom: *proves my point and goes on a rant about how I should be more grateful* Can anyone relate??

  • Thank you for this! I started tearing up because I am going through this with my 3 children and I am trying so hard that I am depressed & trying to figure out what I am doing wrong. I always encourage my 3 children each & every day! I don’t want my relationship with them to be like the one I have with my parents. I am the badseed of the family and never ever want my 3 children to feel that way. I’ll admit I am a worry wart and can be a bit overly protective when it comes to their safety but I have reasons for that.

  • My mom loves me so much, but she always gets mad at me because she says that I talk back. I don’t understand this though because all I would do is ask a question. It was not always like this, and I want it to be back to normal, but I don’t know how to fix our relationship. I came to this article looking for some help, and my only hope is to communicate with her. But I’m afraid she will get mad at me like she did before. Any other tips to help me fix my relationship with my mom?

  • I know a lot of this is meant for mentally healthy people but I find that some of this is not manageable. I have brothers who think it’s a good idea to fight all the time so if I get stuck in the car with them, if I want to stay happy I have to tune everyone out. I would totally hug my parents more if I wasn’t becoming touch averse and I wish I liked being touched. But I don’t. Not because it isn’t “cool”, I don’t give a heck about socially cool stuff. But because touch makes me uncomfortable. Maybe there should be articles on relationships with teens that have mental disorders like anxiety, depression etc. That would do me some good.

  • I was really sick for most of teen sons lives, the doctors didn’t think I would make it, but I did. Even though I’m better, I still have limitations on what I can do physically. I feel like I missed out on so many things, but they understand it wasn’t my fault. Yet we still have a strained relationship and I want so much for it to be better. I’m constantly checking the pulse of our relationship to make sure we’re okay. They do want me to change some things, but I don’t what they are. When I ask what I can do better, they tell me it’s my job as their mom to figure it out. Their dad and I are still together, but he’s often verbally and emotionally abusive. That had caused my self esteem and confidence to suffer greatly and I’m often depressed. If there are any teens here that can give me some suggestions, I would greatly appreciate your insight. I do hug them often, I tell them how proud I am of them and that I love them. I really need help please, I don’t want to lose them.

  • No offense to this article as I know to meant to help but, not all parents are created equal. I’m sure there are many people that aren’t comfortable hugging a parent daily due to mental or physical abuse. It’s not always possible to talk to a gaslighting parent about your feelings as they turn into the victim. There are articles on this website that DO talk about dealing with those kinds of parents and that’s amazing! However, if there is a parent that has no motivation, no self esteem, and thinks it is too late to fix themselves, how does one fix that? If the parent is taking out their own struggles on the child and refuses to acknowledge that, how do you help? I’m not sure if I’m making much sense with how I’m wording this. I’d love to see a article/videos on helping a parent realize their toxic behavior in a healthy way that doesn’t cause them to lose even more motivation to fix themselves. Back to my original point, not all parents understand these concepts and refuse to accept that their behavior is toxic.

  • My father is an actual psychopath. He abused my mother, called my family members names like stupid and worthless, and even bet my other sister with a shoe to near-death once (and yes, he’s really sexist). He causes tantrums and complains about the slightest of problems when it comes to things like food. The only good thing he does is buy us what we want to get. I wish he could just disappear from my life forever but he keeps coming to my house once a week on Friday and I don’t know how to make it stop. I’m only 13 but I wanna know, is there anything I can do to stop seeing him?

  • 1. We never huge in our house not even when I was a child. 2. What interaction? 3. No, I just do what my mom says. 4. I have an Autistic brother so I don’t have time to spend with her.. plus she has work. 5. I just sit crying while Im yelled at. 6. What she says goes. 7. What’s boundaries? 8. This is ok but I have to have straight A’s.. no A- or im grounded. Perfection is an expectation.

  • I was crying knowing that my dad hates me. My mom asked my dad if he loves me while he was drunk and he never lies when hes drunk he said “who will love a ugly ass disappointment” my heart broke i dont wanna live anymore i wanna go back to the days where my dad loved me, where i had fun with him now its just hatred that he has for me i honestly don’t wanna live anymore. I know im not the best daughter he wanted, but i love him it just breaks me seeing him say he hates me.

  • I love my parents dearly and all I want to do is constantly make them everything but proud and happy. But ways and means they used upbringing me were sometimes very harsh and hurtful even physically. I never wanted anybody to know about this part of my relationship with my parents and I felt ashamed sharing this with someone. I don’t mean to judge them. I just feel sorry that both me and them share these memories which are very sad moments of my childhood. Now I know for sure what I WON’T be doing to MY own kids.

  • If I ever become a parent, I know I won’t be able to remember all what I’m thinking of right now but, I want to treat them better, keep boundaries, help them, try being supportive of what they like to do, and not spoil them too much as they’d be very demanding and not talk properly with anyone! (my sibling has been spoiled that they became like this), and that’s all for what I remember at the moment.

  • Being a child of someone with personality and mental disorders, the only situation where I see positive change happening is if both of us increase time at solo therapy. But when a person is disconnected with themselves and it’s not by choice, it takes a long time and a lot of effort. Two things that people don’t want to sacrifice. Especially if they deem it unnecessary.

  • I can say that my parents dealings with me are sometimes good and sometimes not,i feel tired every day but i still resist because I don’t want them to say anything bad to me,All i need is a break but every time i do that it’s like they think i’m lazy,So sometimes all i do is i pray and i ask him for help so i can get stronger and fight again,I want to show them thats not the only thing i can do.

  • I came here because earlier, I had an argument with my mom, because my brother and I started spitting hurtful words to each other INFRONT of our MOTHER, and when I tried to just stay quiet and mind my own business to avoid such drama, my brother kept telling me such words, until I was hurt with that one word he said, I asked my mother to atleast discipline him or something, well she did, but we all knew it wasn’t enough for my little brother to stop talking, and my brother still didn’t stop, Im a short-tempered person, and… I hit my brother (I know Im immature Im sorry I wasn’t thinking straight), and ofcourse, my mother got mad at me and disciplined me, I said that why didn’t she discipline him better and I wouldn’t have hitted him if she did it right. But all this time, I was still in the wrong, I said ” Why is he ALWAYS the victim?! ” and after some more unrespectful words and glares I gave my mother, I realized.. I was still in the wrong. I did know that I was the wrong one all those years I’ve spent with my family, but I just said ” I might be in the wrong because they cannot understand me ” But it was false.. It was all SELF-PITY, and now.. Our family is gonna be torn into pieces soon, I’ll be sent to my REAL Father and my brother will stay with my step-father (which is my lil bros real father), and my mom will make a way of her own.. I don’t want those things to happen.. But it was all because of me, I LOVE my mother, I LOVE my lil brother, but even tho I tried showing them how I loved them.

  • 1. I tried to hug my mom for a while, but she just saw it as weird 2. every time I tried to talk to my mom she was on the computer and when I asked her to stop being on the computer while I talk yo her she got really annoyed 3. every time I tried to ask for advice she just either said exactly what to do and if I didn’t agree dismissed everything and just said do what you want to do, which I found very unhelpful 4. When I tried to spend some time with her she always were busy or not in the mood, the moment she wanted to do something and I couldn’t it was my fault for not wanting to spend time with her. 5. oh yeah, many emotions were shut down. Pretty sure that’s why I have some serious emotional problems 6. if she listened at all she always had to make it about herself, so yeah 7. oh wow, one she actually did. yeah, if there’s something I really appreciate is that my mom did respect my boundaries. 8. oh, another one she was actually trying to do, well, considering she didn’t pay enough attention to what I did in the first place was really weird to me and I always felt like she didn’t mean it cool

  • I’m 13 and when I was little I used to be bubbly and nice but for around 3 years, this is the worst year I’ve been having problems with my dad. Trust issues, I have that with both my parents, I don’t know but I feel as if they wouldn’t understand. I hate being made fun of even if it’s just got jokes, I have also developed social anxiety which makes me really sensitive and quiet I haven’t been diagnosed and my parents don’t know but I have all the symptoms. Me and my mum have a good relationship we can talk and I don’t get scared or worried around her but when it’s me and my dad I always want to burst out crying and I don’t know why, he hadn’t done anything however he always favours my siblings because he can talk to them normally and I get jealous and try to be like them and talk to him but it just gets really awkward and if we’re in a car by ourselves we don’t speak. He tried to say today you can talk to me if you want I won’t bite and I just broke down inside and cried and I’m crying rn. I’m fine at school tho and I am actually one of the loudest in my friend group and quite popular it’s just at home, I hate it when my sisters make fun of me and call me a crybaby and I stalk my older sister on twitter and she talks about mental health yet she continues to make fun of me because I’m different and I have trust issues with them too, we block each other on all our socials and I’m scared to post anything because I will be made fun of and I hate it so much, I also don’t share what music I like because my sister will say I’m copying her or that song is weird and my baby self will fucking cry, having social anxiety at 13 is shit.

  • Hey, I might need some advice right now. When I was about 10 years old, my mother told me that she regretted giving me my devices because I spent too much time on them, but if she never gave them to me, I would be a completely different person and I won’t be sure how different, I’m now 15 and I am living my life fine. I want my children to be free, do what makes them happy as long as it isn’t hurting them or anyone else, that is why I don’t want to stop them from owning devices. But I want my children to value their family and their lives, if they are too obsessed with the devices they owned, they will spend less time with their family. If I stop them from owning devices, they will eventually be jealous of the other kids around them at school and will think I’m a manipulative father. But if they become too obsessed with their devices and I take it away from them, they won’t know what else to do because they’ve spent all their time on it, hell they might even hate me. Any advice will do, I asked my mother and she is giving me sorta blunt answers like just don’t give them devices.

  • since everyone is okay with sharing their experiences.. i feel safer to open up. tbh i dont even feel like i have parents, yeah my dad works hard everyday to support me with a roof on top of my head and food on the table and good education, and am grateful for that.. but giving me those necessities.. doesnt mean that you have completed your duty as a father, we dont share a father-daughter relationship.. its even awkward when he cracks up a joke.. he is good at heart, i know that but i feel ashamed to say that he has failed as a father in my eyes, despite the fact that he tries.. i odnt know, i feel sorry for him, but i cant help feeling this way.. i cant open up to him or share any stories or ask him for advice in fear of what he could do when he gets mad, he always says that no one is perfect but where does that motto go when i make a mistake? its even worse as for “mother” there’s an ABSENCE of her mother-ly duties, NO connection at all.. it feels like am the mother here.. she expects me to be there for her when she needs something.. i a, there for her, but when i need her..? she completely threw away her duty as a mother.. i dont object that i and my sister do almost ALL the chores at home.. or that i am practically the mother of my lil sissy.. .. what bothers is the lack of EMOTIONAL SUPPORT.. both her and my dad dont know half of the problems i face.. they dont know what do i like, they hardly know anything about me.. they dont know my greatest fears.. my fav teacher.. no, nothing.

  • Hardest part is having a sibling. my cousins and my older brother got high grades and i got average. and now theyre treating me like im invisible. and when i try to pursue my dreams my mother always discourages me. having a nice healthy family is like finding another earth in another universe. i just wish to feel appreciated when i got 4 mistakes on my math exam my dad was mad at me and told me to get better grades.

  • me and my mum argue, not alot but whenever we argue its like a game of tennis… neither of our points gets through to the other person… we think similarly (shes more of a emotional thinker tho) and always want to be right (both logical people)… actually had an argument recently (thats why im here haha) basically i was trying to understand something by talking to my dad and my mum wanted to join into the conversation (which i know wouldnt help as everytime, we argue)… sometimes idk if im in the wrong, or if she is… EDIT: im 19 btw…

  • tbh one of the things I really want to do is talk properly with my parents rather than talking like I’m always offended when I’m conversing with them which breaks the peace 😌 and one thing I don’t exactly like is that If I do anything except for studying on my device, they’d start saying me to stop doing useless things 🙁

  • Very good advice👍 My adult son is 28 yrs and stll doesn’t want to get married!!! Can U advice how to communicate our concerns as parents, so that he responds and understands us ! My daughter doesn’t controll her emotions whenever she gets upset with me. Can U advice how to effectively help her to communicate without losing her temper???

  • The last time I lovingly hugged my parents was when I was in my second grade and I’m in twelfth grade now so, it has been 10 years since I last embraced them wholeheartedly. Not that they’re dead. It’s just that my mom is far-away for she’s working overseas and my dad is cold and distant towards me and my siblings. Sad :<

  • I love my parents but they are not really respectful of me, my mom will get mad at me for rolling my eyes or sassing her but then she turns around and does the same exact thing. Not only that but when i try to approach her about these things or just things in general that i think would help our relationship she gets upset, my brother has been saying how he wants to move out as soon as possible and i tried telling my mom that maybe theres a reason hes saying that and that maybe theres some things she needs to do differently but she just rolls her eyes and gets upset, i seriously dont know what to do, its to the point where im just asking her to listen to what i have to say and shes just getting upset at me, there was another time she was driving me to an event w my friend and i was meeting my friend there, my friend texted me and said she was going to be late so i asked my mom if we can wait in the car for her, ( i have social anxiety and i didnt know anyone at the event so it was very scaring thinking about walking into the event alone) she said no and that she had to get home, i started panicking and say no i cant do this please stay w me and she just demanded i get out of the car, i was left sitting alone for 20 mins before my friend got there. Long story short if anyone has suggestions that could help please let me know

  • My father and I have an unbreakable relationship, but my mother and I have issues still. She has trouble communicating with her children due to past abuse, but she does love me. As a kid, she and my brother would fight all the time, and she’d yell at me for doing something that I didn’t know what was wrong, without giving an explanation as to why. If I asked, it was considered sass. Her advice makes me uncomfortable, and she usually makes me say things after her such as “God, I give you all my anxieties and have faith with you” and I get in trouble if I don’t. I’m forced to say sorry after any arguments, and it’s hard to be honest. I feel pressured and often trapped, and the assumptions that are made about me can make me mad or extremely depressed and suicidal. Doesn’t help that I have HFA, which makes it harder. I want to have a good relationship, but I’m not exactly sure how. Even when I try my best, I absentmindedly do something wrong and I become the bad one. I’m hoping our relationship might change, but I don’t know if it will. I’m at the point where hugging my mom feels like a mistake, and I overall just can’t look her in the eyes most of the time. Eye contact scares me, and she usually forces me to look at her. Whenever I go to her for advice, whether it be about memories or feeling sad, she usually says it’s my fault because I haven’t been eating well or haven’t been sleeping, and she nags me about it. She pressures me into telling her stuff most of the time, which also depresses and stresses me.

  • the thing is me and my mom argue all the time non stop, sometimes i end up saying stuff out of my mouth that i don’t mean and it just happens. i hate myself a lot for it bc some of the stuff i say isn’t even what u should be saying to your mom or anyone. i will try and change how i act but it’s gonna be hard. in the end it’s what’s best for my mom

  • I would love to see more content about how to have healthy relationships. There’s so much about negative relationships. I know I come from a toxic family. I want to learn how to have a happy healthy relationship with my future spouse, future mother/father in law, future children, future cousins, etc. I would also like to learn how to reunite with family members. I’ve lost contact with so many and when I reach out, they seem like they don’t care. How can I get through to them to show them that I do want a healthy relationship with them?

  • My parents are always busy. They were off the entire week and never spent time with me (they went out to drink every night). I felt really sad when they made me go to my grandmother’s house. They even promised to take me out to spend some time together but they never did and that entire day was just both of them sleeping. I feel like they think that just because I’m shy and introverted they can’t bother me.

  • I had a pretty shitty relationship with my parents in my early teenage years (I’m 19 now) and not because my parents treated me badly but because I was a piece of shit child lmao 🙁 but with time it got better. today I have a really good relationship with both my parents, I love them a lot and we spend a lot of time together, I wish people could have the same relationship w their parents as I have with mine.

  • My therapist said I don’t have a relationship with my parents that we’ve been treating each other like strangers and that’s why I’m so scared to be close to them. She said that’s a reason I can’t have deeper relationships and she also said it’s a thing in our family that I should break the pattern but it’s so hard, I don’t understand exactly what I should do :()

  • Me and my dad have a great relationship. We get into fights sometimes but all families do that. It’s me and my mom’s relationship that I’m worried about. I’m thirteen now and since I’ve grown older, I’ve started acting more like my dad. I get mad at my mom and so annoyed at her for doing the most littlest things. When she needs me most as a daughter to comfort her, I don’t know what to do. We get into fights almost every day and she thinks I hate her now. Me and my dad don’t include her much to activities because she never wants to do what we want to do and we never want to do what she wants to do. She told me that she feels worthless and I said “Your not completely worthless”. I feel like a horrible daughter and I don’t know what to do.

  • I’m falling apart with my teenage son, I’m lost at the moment to the point of where I no longer want to spend quality time with him. He has been very difficult in recent years and my military background has not helped the situation. I have tried on multiple occasions to conduct a soft parenting approach but as of recent months I’ve really struggled to use anything but brute dictation and having a full blown shouting match. I know it’s wrong and I’m trying to rectify it but it’s very hard to be given verbal abuse by my son and not respond with spite back. Any advice from anyone would be greatly appreciated I don’t want to loose my son but at the same time I can’t let him treat others like garbage just to get his own way.

  • I dont necessarily have a bad relationship with my parents, but my parents barely talk to one another (caused by years of bad communication and a huge fight), its been going on for years now, and overtime i feel that my relationship with each of them is weakening. Now I’m searching everywhere: how do you get your parents to want to fix their relationship?

  • I’m afraid. So afraid of pushing myself away from my mom while she’s here, and then regretting it once she’s gone. I know that I realistically have an incredibly vast amount of time before that happens, but I feel like what I know I SHOULD do and what I end up DOING seem to be different things and I’m lashing out at my mom even though I know I’ll regret it. In addition, I feel sad often because I feel like I’m often too secretive towards her and I don’t trust her with some parts of my life, but simultaneously I feel terrible because I don’t want to be keeping a ton of things from her (for example, my sexuality is closeted to her because I don’t feel comfortable talking about that yet but I still feel bad for keeping it from her). I just don’t feel like I spend enough REAL time with my mom and it’s been admittedly a pretty scary feeling.

  • My parents make me so so SO insecure abt everything. If Im proud of something I drew the first thing they say is whats wrong abt it. I also heard them talking abt me behind my back multiple times and it’s negative and bad. My mom also tells me to stop eating and she makes fun of me when I do what I like to do. I fr dont know what to do

  • See, I have all of the issues from the “dealing with alcoholics ” article but now I don’t live with that person, I live with my other parent and step parent. Because of those issues I feel like part of me wants to fix my relationship with my step parent but sometimes I don’t because I feel like either of them (parent and step parent) deserve my love.. I always feel put down and never good enough so sometimes I just say “fuck it” instead of trying because I’ll probably get grounded again for something stupid that I did and then I’ll be okay and then the cycle repeats. I’m always messing up, I’m always doing SOMETHING wrong, and on the few occasions that I do something right, it’s ignored and regarded as something insignificant OR they congratulate me and it feels weird when they do.

  • My dad and I are always into arguments. At first I thought it was his fault since he’s fierce and stuff, but now i’m really scared i’m the one hurting him. I want to get closer with him but I’m an introvert, don’t know him that well, and have no idea how to start conversations without getting all awkward… I really want him to know I love him, but my mom have sometimes told me he feels like I don’t, and whenever I try to show him I care about him, he doesn’t “get it” or like even if I just say hi when he walks in the door, he just says hi and leaves to go talking to my sister. I don’t want it to be like this forever considering i’m not even in high school, but I don’t know what to do

  • I have a good relationship with my parents, but, my mum is kind of a shopaholic, and well.. I can go overly anxious over cluster at home, plus I live in Hong Kong, so space can be limited. My Anxiety just randomly pops up when considering to buy anything at all, that includes books, pens.. etc etc. I just think about it at the most randomest of times. I always talk to her about my concerns and my phobia of clusters, but she says purchasing items is the only way to make her happy?? How do I get her to reduce the frequency of her buying items?

  • I don’t really have a bad relationship with my parents, it’s just… awkward. I used to follow them around everywhere and were close to them as a kid, but I just kind of slowly stopped talking to them without knowing. I want to get closer to them because they are older than most kids’ parents these days and I feel like I could lose them at any time, but I don’t know what to talk about with them. They don’t really have any hobbies; they work all the time. When they come home they’re exhausted and I don’t want to bother them. Doesn’t help that I overthink when I try to start a conversation, so it just ends up being awkward…

  • Me and my moms relationship started off well in the beginning, my dad was an alcoholic and she was forced into a “me and my kids against the world situation”. She did her best and did very well until recently. My mom got married to my stepdad not too long ago and their marriage has already gone to hell. They couldn’t go a day without screaming at each other. Me and my brother would always tell each other how long it would be until they gat divorced, but they didn’t. My mom became more irritable but we just blamed it all on him. Things were already bad, but it got so much worse after I came out. Ok, “coming out” isn’t the right thing, being torn out of the closet more like. So long story short I had gotten in trouble and my mom looked through my phone and saw an email between a female friend and I were I confessed that I liked her. She screamed at me for a very long time with my little brother in the room. At the end of the argument she made me text my friend telling her I wasn’t gay and then my mom looked for youth groups cuz I needed Jesus (what she doesn’t know is I don’t believe in Jesus. I can’t wait until she finds that out). After that our relationship just kept getting worse. She continued to take her anger with her husband out on us and continued to constantly remind me that I was wrong because of my own sexuality. Then on Easter mine and my brothers worst fear came true. Our mom showed us a picture from an ultrasound with a little bean-like shape in it. She was pregnant.

  • I don’t have a family or friends. I’ve always been alone. Nobody there to TRULY care for me. They always say that they “love me” but they don’t even know what love is. People come and go. People say they have friends but they don’t even what that word means. They have acquaintances just like me. Everyone that has been in my twenty years of life is an acquaintance whether they’re here or not. “Family or not”

  • Well too late for me to do that with my parents I keep my conversations with them at a minimal because of stuff that’s happened in the past, but they do,do that hugging thing so I’m wondering if they saw that in a article 🤔 also I wish my parents were more honest/admittance about them having a wrong in a conversation or try to not react negatively about problems I have then maybe I might open up to them more

  • The saddest thing is that I know it’s my fault my parents are both loving but i can’t i just can’t have a conversation with them what should I tell them, what should I say and i have an addiction to phones and i lash out at whoever prevents it from doing it i can’t help it. I am just hoping that one day it will get better and i can actually talk to them.

  • I’m not to sure about the high thing. Yes I do like hugging my friends . Or at least those I have left. But my mom only recently stopped asking what I wanted when I would randomly hug her. Because she thought that was the only reason. And she only stopped asking that, because I started to do almost anything she wanted me to do.

  • I wanna understand. I really do. I keep telling myself that she’s just stressed because of her work but everytime we talk its like she has a grudge on me. One word from me and I will receive a yell. I mean, I’m stressed too because of school but I never divert my emotions to them. When I concede she will tell—no—more like yell at me ” why are u not answering me?! Oh you’re just gonna go silent on me and gonna make yourself look like a victim and tell your dad?!” Even if my dad is mad at me too. And when sometimes I can’t help it and answer her she’ll yell at me ” Are you disrespecting me?!” And I’m like where would I place myself? And when I wanna make up with her she’ll just give me the ‘silent treatment’ and would not even glance at me but then, this morning, my dad messaged me comparing me to me other daughters saying I haven’t even proven myself something and they’re already disappointed at me unlike other daughters who give their everything to their parents. I just can’t help asking myself after that that am i not good enough to be their daughter? They’re always mad at me like i haven’t done anything right in my life and it makes me feel useless. I always wanna ace my exams to make them proud but when my mom told me after I won a math contest last week that having a brain doesn’t mean I’m good enough to be proud of and I just lost it. I wanna be a good daughter. I wanna make them proud. I wanna make them happy but how if they always see the bad side of me and telling it to my face that im not good enough?

  • I love my mom and she knows that, as much as she hurts me I still care about her. I give her a hug in the mornings but not an actual hug more like a side hug. I can’t have a conversation because I’m not social and I don’t know how to make them. If I do she just nods and stays on her phone. Also when they article said bond by music. Well I only listen to kpop heheh.

  • It hurts to say my mom has HIGH expectations and does not congradulate me for good things very often (rarely congratulates me) one time when I improved during a very hard year of school it wasn’t up to her expectations, and instead of being told “keep up the good work” I was told “What is wrong with you? You aren’t even trying!”. I know my parents love me and are trying to do the best for me, but I wish they would do a more encouraging approach.

  • It always has to be me making all of the moves to save the relationship i never had in the first place. I am so tired of trying to fix what will always get broken. They don’t need me. I am not wanted. i wish my mom never gave birth to me. Its my fault she is so miserable and self pities herself now. I can’t make them happy if i am not happy. I always have to hide from them. I can’t be my true self. I wish i was never born.

  • Never talked about this… But my father is in defense so his life was busy and when we were children i barely see him and when we see him at the night he usually was drunk and then he went on to sleep, and i understand he has his own work life and then i got used to him not being arounf aand now whenever i thunk of my future how im gonna give to my parents hes not in my imagination only my mother is there, and now his work is less hectic and I’ve spending much timw with hin than i use to in my childhood and now every single things about him irritate me and bother m.. I would rather be alone.. He is nice and never ever raise voice on me and hit me and my brother but now eveb when he ask a single question i get mad, i dont show him that im mad or irritated but i find it really hard to even smile.. When he say something that Supposed to be funny… I dont want to hurt him and i try to be mindful and noy get irritated but sometimes it doesn’t help….. Can someone tell me whats wrong with me… Im 20 year old and indian

  • whenever we have arguments, which is quite often, it’s mostly one sided. i can’t speak up because i know that it’ll make the situation worse + i can sense when to shut up, but apparently my parents don’t they constantly vent at ME about all the things that hurt THEM, but i never feel safe enough to tell them anything about how i feel because of how they are ya ok mom you say it’s my choice but honestly i don’t think i have any choice in the matter

  • I’m only perusal this article because I see my mom give her loving attention to my other siblings! And it’s hard for me to just watch my baby brother (he’s 4) he can’t talk well I think he’s mute but my mom does take him to therapy to make sure he learns how to talk so he doesn’t go mute! So I mostly just play with him outside in the swing so I’m just trying to be a parent for him (I’m 12) so I do feel bad for him but I do hope this helps

  • Is there the possibility of making a article similar to this one but with parents and adult children? Sort of addressing how to make relationships between adult children and parents that are being strained by different and incompatible personalities, views, and needs? How parents may want to cling to their ‘child’ now grown while the adult child is now trying to be independent but finds themselves sort of ‘trapped’ in the parenting cage? Don’t know if this makes any sense.

  • Me and my mom butt heads a lot, every time we interact she yells at me for something or goes on and on about things I do wrong. She doesn’t try to spend time with me that much either. It seems like she doesn’t want to talk with me all the time and I admit to having anger issues and being rude sometimes, but for the past month I’ve been WAY better but its still the same. She only compliments me maybe once a day or every two days but then complains about everything else. It makes me feel like a burden. If I wasn’t here she wouldn’t have to spend so much money on me, drive me places, or have extra stress. Don’t worry I’m not contemplating suicide, I’m actually seeing a therapist and that’s why I have been a nicer kid although I suck at doing household chores, but I’m so busy all the time so when I have off I just lay around. I wish I could be a better kid, but I guess ill just always be useless. Sorry for the rant, I just needed to vent:)

  • I see… thought i don’t like it when my mom wants to embrace me. My brother hates to talk with her. So i feel like the more she does the more it will disgust. Maybe it should be different approaches for this cases? I guess, there should be colaboration, and both minds that wants to better the relationship.

  • it’s actually me who is the problem here my dad loves me more than anything but I don’t why I just always end up giving him a straight short reply which sounds rude. forget hugging I am not like a bubbly person at all who’ll go and talk for hours or just smile unnecessarily. I KNOW it hurts him it’s clear in his face sometimes but still I don’t know how to change myself and become more open. It’s ego for whatever but I just can’t go talk to him or hug him like that suddenly idkkkkkkkkkk what to do I was searching for manifest good family relationship but this also came…

  • My mum doesn’t like me or any of my siblings hugging her, she thinks it’s annoying. I tried it several times and everytime I did she pushed me away saying I was annoying and irritating, and that I shouldn’t touch her. To her the only reason she looks at me or talks to me on the first place is to ask me to study, do the work at home or perform the religious offerings. She likes to control me? She often peeps in my tab or enters our (me and sisters) room suddenly to check on what I’m doing. I’m not allowed to have any friends or talk to any people in general. Not even have permission to social media. Not just boys, she even restricted me from making female friends on social media. During Highschool she used to not let me go to any parties or gathering they would have. She says she won’t let me work because to her if I start working I may become demanding and follow my own rules. I asked her to get me a new phone cuz the tab I use is like 3 years old and it has battery and storage issues (it was cheap) and she is like I’ll get you another tab but no phone and I’m freaking 18 years old. So getting a sim and all is just a dream..like literally. I respect her cuz she is the reason I came to this world. Just hopefully she doesn’t become the reason I leave. And this is not just my story, my sister who is 21 years old goes through the same shit.

  • My mother used to say my report card is “not good enough” or “could be better…” Now I put to much pressure on myself when it comes to marks My teacher says I have axienty while taking test to think I not good enough or it could be better I got an applying and extending report card (A and Bs) but I still say “Not good enough”

  • I wish my parents would even think about loving me. I come from an abusive (more mental than physchical) home and perusal this article made me have a breakdown. How could i hug the same person that let me do drugs and drink when i was younger? By the time i was 6, i was drinking entire bottes of vodka and smoking joints.

  • Me and my mom have a good relationship, not same for my dad tho.. My dad never showed me love from when I was little, I always tried to talk to him but he would usually say “GO Away im busy” he had friends coming over, i would go and hug him but he will push me away.. He bought me all the toys I wanted but I didnt ask for that, I just wanted a bit of attention from him, now he is saying that he didnt talk to me cause he made money for me, Ok? But a bit of attention isn’t gonna hurt you or me, he will usualy leave, and me and my mom would be alone, he never took me to school, or gave me a ride back home, my cousin usually came to my home, my cousin always was going to my dad and hug him kiss him on the cheek, and he never said no or denied, only to me, he would usually tell me why my cousin will hug him and stuff, and not me.. I started ignoring him and not showing love for him.. But for my mom I show all the love I can.. Now he is showing me so much attention but I deny him, and push him away, I know its not ok, but I cant it just hurts.. He still compares me to my classmate, friends and Family members, my grandma never showed love to his son (my dad) my dad had 3 brothers, they’re mom would not show attention for the 2. But the oldest got all the atention and love, my dad never goes to his mother, he love her mother more than me and my mom, his mom hates my mom, and shows my cousin more love.. My dada brother is toxic he stole my dads money, so all my Family is toxic, and the oldest brother is toxic to!

  • I have big problems with my mom mostly because I can’t stand her personality and the way she handles things, so I’m very distant from her, and I don’t like spending time with her because I always end up unhappy at the end of it. I don’t know how to fix our relationship if I get annoyed by spending time with her

  • I always used to behave badly with my parents.They bought me whatever I wanted.Being an introvert,my parents are the only two friends in my life and I can talk about anything with them.There were times I didn’t get good grades,even though my mom was a little disappointed,my dad always supported me. My dad’s biggest dream was to make me a doctor.But since I don’t understand science much,I always wanted to be a banker and my parents supported my that decision too☺️yet I yell at them,hurt them,behave badly with them just because I’m angry all the time cause they can’t give me everything like my cousin’s parents.Still they forgive me every time 🙂 After reading all the comments,I’m very happy that the Almighty has blessed me with so much 🙃♥️thought I was the only kid who is depressed but no there are many whose cases are worst than mine.I’m sorry for you pretty souls :'( I hope and pray that you get what you want in life. Thank you Psych2Go the article was amazing ♥️

  • My mom always has to be the victim, and therefore constantly sees me as the bad guy in many situations. I can’t tell her how I feel when I’m upset with her because, again, she will victimize herself and automatically want my pity. When I don’t give it to her, once again, I am the bad guy. I just can’t wait for the day when I can meet someone who will be willing to hear me out and not constantly put me in situations that make me uncomfortable and trigger my anxiety. Someone who won’t shame me for having normal emotions and reactions.

  • Yes, my mom feeds me warm meals and gives me fresh clothes to wear but when I really need her I feel like she’ll laugh at me or deny everything I say so I’ll hate myself (which I already do). All my life her parenting method was to insult me and slap me to ‘teach me a lesson’. It didn’t teach me but rather scared me. She never taught me to express my feelings or to be grateful. Now she blames me for being a bad child. One day we had a fight and I just snapped. When she told me I was rude and ungrateful to her I said it was all because of her, the way she treated me was all because of her. What did she do? She ofc blamed me and she treated me like that because I was rude. Like, did I decided since the day I was born to be a rude ungrateful child and make your life a living hell? It annoys me so much and I already want to kill myself so I don’t need her to make me feel even worse.

  • Me and my parents aren’t as close.One parent is usually at work while the other is at home taking care of my baby brother, so my bond with my sister and brother is stronger than my parents bond.They have the no technology while interacting with a family member rule though.Also since I’m 11 it just feels weird to talk about puberty and girl stuff or asking my parents for supplies I need for my puberty experience.I just feel as if they’re going to judge me.I also feel pressured to have good grades, so when I get less than a C+ I secretly freak out..If anyone nows how to not feel judged or weird around your parents please tell me..I’m also open to suggestions.

  • On a scale from 1-10 I would say me and my parents have an 8 because we love each other very much just when my parents get angry they explode. I always try to talk it out but like it said in the article they react instead of listening and use whatever I said against me and it sucks. It ruins days and makes me sick. I don’t know why but I get blacked vision and my ears ring at An alarming rate and I feel like I’m gonna pass out. I hope my mom forgives me for being such a jerk,pest,disappointment and an in grateful piece of crap.

  • I consider myself to have pretty good relationships with my parents, but I find myself often disappointing and angering my mom. We have often disagreed throughout my childhood, but it causes me so much pain and disappointment within myself to have a relationship like this. I feel like she loves me but doesn’t like me. I do well in school and sports, but I always seem to be doing something wrong. Is there a way I can fix this?

  • Well number 6 is already been destroyed, I only feel comfortable talking about certain things with my friends. Number 8 is also wasted, they tend to think that good things are expected, then bad things get me an loud earful or get me grounded for a few weeks to a year. So I tend to think of things as superficial, hugs and kisses are just merely physical contact, I feel no connection. Or them talking just loud enough for me to hear. So yes, I think my relationship is disintegrating if it hasn’t already.

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