The study explores the relationship between familism and close relationship processes, focusing on how familism contributes to better psychological health by facilitating the benefits of closeness and social support in a diverse U. S. university sample. Family relationships are crucial for well-being across the life course, with various types including marital, intergenerational, and sibling ties. Rigid family rules create relationships based on obligation rather than affection, which can lead to conflict and pessimism.
Family bonding can act as a buffer against stress, foster happiness, and promote a sense of security and belonging. However, stigma around family estrangement can hinder people from seeking help to cope with their family members. The study examines the effect of family environment on self-esteem development from late childhood (age 10) through adolescence (age 16) using 4-wave longitudinal data from 674 families.
Families are susceptible to mounting pressures from finances and work, but they can be a life-giving force when healthy and relatively stress-free. Active awareness and empathy are essential for responding to one another’s needs. Family therapy is a form of talk therapy that focuses on improving relationships among family members. Family systems therapy involves working individually and together to resolve problems directly affecting one or more family members.
Family connections provide a greater sense of meaning and purpose, as well as social and tangible resources that benefit well-being. Family therapists aim to improve relationships and resolve conflicts within the family structure by working with all involved rather than individual clients. Emotional intelligence (EQ) is an effective tool for overcoming rifts and improving relationships with family members. A good home environment ensures that a child’s physical, cognitive, emotional, and social needs are adequately met.
| Article | Description | Site |
|---|---|---|
| Family Systems Therapy | During family systems therapy, the family works individually and together to resolve a problem that directly affects one or more family members. | psychologytoday.com |
| Family Therapy: What It Is, Techniques & Types | Family therapy can help you better understand and work through the roadblocks that are preventing your family from living a full and healthy … | my.clevelandclinic.org |
| Couple and Family Psychology | A couple and family psychologist is able to enrich or improve the functioning of non-clinical or normal couples to treat dysfunctional couples, individuals and … | apa.org |
📹 Daddy Issues: Psychology Behind Father Wound
The relationship you have with your father can shape your adult life significantly, affecting how you handle relationships, …
How Psychology Can Improve People'S Lives?
Psychology is a vital field that explains human behavior, aiding individuals in making better decisions, managing stress, and improving their actions through insights gained from past behaviors. Psychologists utilize scientific research to explore how people learn, interpret events, and make choices, applying this knowledge to develop strategies for healthier daily living. Specialized areas such as positive psychology focus on individual strengths and well-being, while resilience research helps understand how people navigate and thrive amidst challenges.
Through education in psychology, individuals gain increased self-awareness and critical thinking skills that lead to more fulfilling lives. This field also equips practitioners like therapists and life coaches with the tools to foster strengths and encourage happiness and resilience. Moreover, understanding psychological principles can enhance motivation, leadership, communication, emotional intelligence, decision-making, and even memory and financial management.
Research highlighting factors that contribute to longer, happier lives is essential, as it illuminates pathways to cope with adversities, particularly for young adults facing chronic illnesses. Overall, psychology facilitates both personal growth and societal improvements, influencing various sectors such as education, justice, and employment, thereby making the world a better place. Ultimately, psychology’s insights empower individuals to lead more constructive and fulfilling lives.
How Does Psychology Focus On Family?
Researchers in the Department of Psychology investigate various aspects of couple and family dynamics, such as relationship changes, diverse family structures, parenting practices, and interventions for enhanced family functioning. Couple and family psychology (CFP) specifically addresses the emotions, thoughts, and behaviors of individuals and families within their relational contexts. Family bonds, including marital, intergenerational, and sibling relationships, are vital for well-being throughout life.
Bowen family systems theory, developed by Dr. Murray Bowen, emphasizes self-reflection, growth, and effective communication, promoting better health and lower rates of mental health issues. Family psychology examines systemic and interpersonal relationships, highlighting how familial dynamics can impact psychological health. The Journal of Family Psychology (JFP) publishes empirical studies addressing factors that contribute to lasting relationships, emphasizing systemic approaches to family functioning.
The discipline advocates for a broad understanding of what constitutes a "family," accommodating evolving forms from nuclear families to chosen families. Family therapy focuses on improving communication and emotional support among members to foster healthy dynamics. Overall, family psychology combines research and practice to address the complexities of family interactions, aiming to enhance emotional well-being and mental health outcomes for individuals across diverse family settings.
How Do Family Dynamics Affect Health?
Family dynamics significantly influence health outcomes, both positively and negatively. Key factors such as individuation, mutuality, flexibility, stability, and clear communication contribute to healthy family relationships. Stressful familial interactions can impair immune function and elevate allostatic load, negatively impacting well-being over a lifetime. Various family relationships—marital, intergenerational, and sibling ties—play crucial roles in mental health, with positive interactions enhancing emotional balance and negative dynamics exacerbating conditions like anxiety and depression.
Healthy family dynamics offer emotional support, reducing stress and fostering a conducive environment for good mental health throughout life. Conversely, adverse family environments, marked by dysfunction, can impose emotional scars and contribute to long-term mental health issues, including childhood disorders and adult depression. The significance of family dynamics is further underscored by how they shape individual behaviors and choices regarding health practices.
Studies highlight that supportive family relationships, characterized by open communication and reassurance, are essential in mitigating depression and anxiety. Children exposed to positive family environments tend to experience enhanced self-esteem and overall better health outcomes as adults. Thus, nurturing healthy family dynamics is vital for promoting mental and physical well-being, particularly in fostering resilience and coping mechanisms against stressors encountered throughout life.
Why Is Family Important In Psychology?
The family plays a crucial role in navigating life's challenges and fostering emotional well-being. From birth, children rely on their families to meet basic needs and shape their understanding of emotions and behaviors. Future research and health initiatives should recognize the complexities of family dynamics, considering factors like relationship quality and social status within diverse family structures. Families are the primary socialization agents; they are often the first groups that children engage with, influencing their psychological health through strong bonds.
Family relationships provide essential resources for coping with stress, promoting healthy behaviors, and boosting self-esteem, all leading to better overall well-being and lower rates of depression. The significance of quality family time extends across emotional, cognitive, and social domains, underscoring its ability to enhance emotional connections. Inclusive definitions of family are essential, as kinship can take various forms beyond biological ties, offering emotional support and a sense of belonging.
Ultimately, strong family connections are foundational for personal development and mental health, offering the love and support needed for individuals to thrive. Acknowledging the diverse nature of families enriches our understanding of their impact on human well-being.
What Can Family Relationships Provide During Stress?
Family relationships play a crucial role in helping individuals cope with stress, adopt healthier behaviors, and improve self-esteem, which ultimately enhances overall well-being. In times of crisis, such as financial difficulties, individuals often turn to their families for emotional and practical support. Families provide a consistent presence in a person's life, carrying shared histories and future aspirations. While stress is a natural response to challenges, strong family bonds can serve as buffers, fostering happiness and a sense of security.
However, family stressors often vary with life stages and can arise from changes in family composition, conflict, or loss. Effective management of stress is vital to mitigate its negative effects on family dynamics, communication, and well-being. Strategies such as open communication, regular family meetings, and practicing relaxation techniques can significantly reduce tensions at home. Acknowledging and discussing emotions can enhance understanding within the family.
Furthermore, engaging in activities together fosters support, promoting resilience against stress. Ultimately, nurturing secure family relationships creates a foundation for love, care, and advice, vital for emotional health during stressful times, helping families navigate challenges collectively while prioritizing each member's well-being.
What Is Familial Psychology?
Family psychology is a specialized field within professional psychology that examines the emotions, thoughts, and behaviors of individuals, couples, and families within the context of their relationships and environment. Family dynamics, which encompass how family members influence one another, play a significant role in shaping these interactions. Familism, a cultural value prioritizing family over self, is linked to better psychological health. Close family relationships promote overall well-being and reduce depression and disease throughout life.
Family relationships, whether marital, intergenerational, or sibling ties, are crucial for enduring well-being. They are the first social systems individuals encounter, passing down behaviors and relationship patterns across generations. The Journal of Family Psychology (JFP) serves as a key publication in this area. Bowen's Family Systems Theory provides insights into family dynamics, while family therapy focuses on enhancing relationships within families by addressing mental health and behavioral issues.
Families are highly variable in form and structure—biological, extended, and nuclear families each present unique interactions and roles. Family therapy aims to resolve conflicts, improve communication, and foster healthier relationships among family members.
Does Familism Contribute To Better Psychological Health?
Higher family closeness is linked to increased social support, which in turn promotes better psychological health. This supports the idea that familism, a key Latino value emphasizing prioritization of family relationships, enhances psychological well-being by fostering family closeness and perceived social support. Several types of family relationships, such as marital, intergenerational, and sibling ties, play a crucial role in well-being throughout life.
Familism has been identified as a protective factor against mental health issues and is believed to support children's growth and development. Research indicates that higher levels of familism and social support may mitigate negative psychosocial outcomes. Additionally, familism correlates with reduced loneliness and depression, reinforcing its role in promoting positive psychosocial functioning. The study highlights the importance of examining both mothers' and fathers' familism values and the emotional dynamics within family interactions.
Despite some inconsistencies in previous research regarding familism's moderating effects on stress and health outcomes, its protective influence remains prominent, contributing to lower anxiety and improved psychological health across diverse demographic groups, including Latinx, Asian American, and White populations. Overall, familism's emphasis on close, supportive family relationships significantly relates to enhanced psychosocial health.
How Can Psychology Benefit Your Life?
Understanding psychology can significantly enhance your life by providing insights into human behavior, improving communication, and aiding in conflict management. It enables better navigation of interpersonal relationships, whether with family, friends, or strangers. Taking a psychology course offers numerous benefits, even for those not majoring in the subject. The discipline promotes self-understanding, allowing you to comprehend your decisions and interactions better. Psychology is grounded in scientific research, revealing how people learn and interpret experiences, which can facilitate smarter choices in daily life.
Incorporating psychology can boost mental health, enhance communication skills, and aid stress management. It fosters a sense of purpose, contributing to improved physical health and overall happiness. By studying psychology, you can acquire analytical and communication skills essential for tackling everyday challenges and understanding various social dynamics. Furthermore, psychological knowledge can lead to a more fulfilling life by promoting critical thinking and emotional intelligence, ultimately enhancing career prospects and personal well-being.
What Is Psychological Kinship?
Psychological kinship is the concept of valuing significant others as if they were family members, playing a crucial role in both physical and psychological well-being. This construct highlights the impact of kinship feelings on interpersonal relationships, especially noted in therapeutic settings where clients may seek a quasifamilial bond with their therapists. Kinship serves as a primary organizing principle in human relations, influencing daily interactions, communication, and social norms across various cultures.
While biological kinship is based on genetic connections, psychological kinship reflects relational qualities shaped by social cues. Positive social interactions contribute to identity fusion within communities, with the Kinship Scale measuring psychological kinship. Kinship fundamentally connects individuals, generating support networks that influence thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, placing emphasis on family dynamics. In more collectivistic societies, kinship values often dictate interpersonal relationships, rewarding adherence to kinship norms.
Understanding the nature of kinship is vital in social cognition, with implications for both individual behavior and broader social structures. This multifaceted concept continues to be relevant across disciplines, influencing therapy practices, social organization, and even evolutionary biology, highlighting its essential role in human connectedness and interaction.
What Is Couple And Family Psychology?
Couple and family psychology is a specialized field in professional psychology that examines the emotions, thoughts, and behaviors of individuals, couples, and families within their relational contexts. Utilizing systems theory, this approach identifies universal relational processes across diverse cultures and structures, differentiating it from other psychological orientations focused solely on intrapersonal or interpersonal issues. Commonly referred to as marriage and family therapy, couple counseling, or family counseling, this practice emphasizes improving communication, coping skills, and overall relational health.
It recognizes that relationships provide essential support for development, resilience, and well-being, while also playing a role in psychopathology. The scholarly journal Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice publishes peer-reviewed research in this area, contributing to the field’s knowledge base. The mission of the Society for Family Psychology (APA Division 43) is to foster the study and practice of family psychology through education, research, and clinical endeavors.
In essence, couple and family psychology focuses on couple dynamics, parenting, and family functioning in order to enhance the wellness of individuals and their relational systems, thereby promoting better psychosocial outcomes across various settings and contexts.
📹 How to Stay Calm Consistently : Psychology & Mental Health
Staying calm consistently requires you to keep a few very important things in mind. Learn how to stay calm consistently with help …
I really like how this article didn’t villainize the dad, since not all daddy issues were caused by abuse or intentional abandonment. My father was in the army so he was co strangely deployed. When he was able to retire, he had a military mindset of “I shouldn’t need to validate you because you’re doing what’s required and expected”, which ended up causing me to strive for any kind of praise or validation from my dad. I ended up being diagnosed with borderline in 2017 and when my dad was informed that he (UNINTENTIONALLY) was a large contributor, he immediately took responsibility and tried to help me to improve. He learned DBT with me, he tried helping me through rough moments, he gave me more validation, and all in all, did everything to make up for the past. I’ve since moved out of my parent’s house and my dad and I have a stronger relationship than most parents and kids I’ve met.
I had an absent father. He would make so many promises, and then he would not come through. That’s why I don’t speak to him anymore. Edit: I called this man the first 4 months of the year straight because I needed help with apartment renovations. Never picked up the phone nor answered my texts. I’m totally done with him.
My father was emotional unavailable. My memories of the past are always him saying, “Man don’t talk or show emotions!”, “Swallow those tears at this instant!”, screaming like he was about to hit me at any time. In time I learned to keep my emotion to myself and even hidden them from my mother. At school, I was constantly bullied and told to “shut up and stay quiet, nobody cares what you think”, so I had to suppress my fellings at school too. When I turned 20 I was diagnostic with depression (shocking right?), I had to learn how to deal with my emotion for the first time in life. I always had fear of relationships, I was terrified with the constant thought of them leaving with or without a reason; eventually I learned that it had something to do with daddy issues. But I never knew that my preference for having female friends had something to do with it. Everytime I asked myself “why only women?”, the answer I got was, “Because I can talk about my fellings without being judged”. It seems so obviously now. But anyways, nowadays I consider my emotional intelligence my greatest strength; for someone that was always a sensitive person that had no emotional support from home, and live in a place where a man with emotion is considered weak; I don’t feel ashamed to show them, and now I can reflect on my own fellings and constantly learn from them, I consider all a victory. If I haven’t looked for professional help in my lowest point, I would never had found out that I was suppressing one of the best parts of me.
My father had 6 kids with my mom, none of whom he wanted. I was the first born, used as a hostage by my mom to force my dad to marry her, or never see me again. He hated us and expressed it all the time, not directly in words but in his behaviors, how he spoke with us, and his readiness to beat us for even the smallest transgressions. I tried to connect with him anyway, both in childhood and adulthood, but once I came out to the family he cut me off completely. Honestly I believe I’m better for it, though the damage is long since done
I think the saddest thing about my daddy issues is the fact that sometimes at night while I’m trying to fall asleep, I secretly imagine myself seeing him again and thinking about how maybe he would have changed. That he could actually be my father, and I could be his daughter. We could have that amazing relationship that I see all the other girls in my grade have with their father. But deep down I know that he wouldn’t, and that I am just craving that love from a man so badly. Having daddy issues sucks man. I will never be able to have a father figure in my life because of him. So instead of crying to my dad about boys, I’m crying to a boy about my dad.
My father may be present but he never really gave me the affection and attention I needed as I grew up. One of my teachers took care of me at school and acted as my father figure. He, himself, also had issues with his father. Hence why we bonded deeply because he wanted to be a father his own dad could never be while I wanted a father who supports and cares about me and my well-being. I’ll forever be grateful to him.
It should be appreciated how important it is for kids to have a mother AND father figure in their lives. (I say figure, because sometimes our parent figures aren’t actually parents but neighbors, teachers, friends, or sometimes our parents are both the same sex, but can still fill that role). It’s important for them to understand healthy ways of being feminine and healthy ways of being masculine.
Timestamps 1). What are “daddy issues” 0:50 2). Modern theories: attachment, absence, and abuse 2:09 3). A troubled father’s legacy 3:57 4). Multi-faceted arena of relationships 4:35 5). Marrying ‘daddy’ 4:46 6). Avoiding engaging emotions 4:53 7). Negative impact on sexual behaviour 5:03 8). Father complex 5:31 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
My experience is a bit different. My mom died when I was 11 which left my dad to take on the parental role. He filed for early retirement to stay home and raise me and my sister. (He was in his 40’s) my relationship with my dad is the one thing I cherish most. He was present both physically and emotionally. He taught me things, pushed me to do better in school, made me laugh when I talked about my boy problems. The day he died felt like a piece of me was taken. The man who sacrificed everything to raise me was gone and with it went his love and support I was so accustomed to. I miss him so much and I know he’s resting peacefully
Hey, you might have daddy issues but you still can be confident, radient and self sufficient. You might have daddy issues but can still have healthy outlook about yourself, avoid red flags and find a great partner. You might have daddy issues but can still be in a beautiful, stable relationship. Remember, having issues don’t make you prone to attract the negatives. They, can also make you aware of errors and take you to an amazing end. We’ll get through this!
I had a very supportive loving father until I was 21 . He passed from lung cancer then I had a mentally ill stepdad. I don’t suffer from issues like this I just learned to steer clear from my stepdad. Like I never developed a true relationship with him. I was an adult at this time and I didn’t feel the need to replace the healthy figure I had in my life. He’s not a weirdo he just has his own trauma in which it is not my responsibility to unpack. He is older now and does confide in me more as he goes through the life stage of looking back and evaluating his life. I listen and enjoy the stories but that’s about it. He has kids of his own. I learned to just except he is with my mother and leave it there. It doesn’t have to be about me. In some cases we need to draw firm boundaries and wish people well.
As a first child, my father wasn’t present for almost the first decade because of working abroad. But when he came back, we did have a great start, but the lowest point of my life was also the same level as it started. Now that I’m entering adulthood, I don’t want it to affect my SELF, I’ll just do my best to at least build a good relationship with my family. Currently, it is still uncertain and a bit grey situation.
00:00 Introduction 00:52 1 – What are “daddy issues 02:10 2 – Modern theories: attachment, absence, and abuse 03:58 3 – A troubled father’s legacy 04:37 4 – Multi-faceted arena of relationships 04:47 5 – Marrying ‘daddy’ 04:54 6 – Avoiding engaging emotions 05:04 7 – Negative impact on sexual behaviour 05:31 8 – Father complex
Yet another article that hits close to home, yet I feel helps work through complex emotions. When I was really young, my Dad worked all the time. Only time I ever say him is when he would discipline me. He also had a nasty habit of using up all his patients at work leaving very little for when he got home. Sometimes he had a tendency to explode and it was up to my Mother to tell him he was going too far. He started to have more time when we got older, but I was never interested in what he was interested in. The major things I’ve noticed is a fear of abandonment, as well as high anxiety. There was a lack of self confidence, but that was for a whole other reason. As for trying to find another father figure, I never saw the point. This is what I was brought up to know what a father was, why would I want more? 1 is bad enough. As for the relationship, it was one of fear, which switched to tolerance, with some sparks of respect. Now the fear has turned to hatred and if it wasn’t for his handy man skills, I’d be perfectly content to cut him out of my life. I guess the only other thing to mention is not really knowing which of the 2 sections to look at. Being trans gender I was born male and became female, maybe it would be a combination of Father complex and Daddy Issues. I’m not sure if anyone will read this, but it’s sure feels nice to work through some of these difficult emotions.
My father’s absence can be best summed up in the following way: loss of enjoyment of life. I’m just happy that over the years I have run into information like the one present in the article to help me understand that my issues are real, valid, not my fault, and that it’s not something I chose. Most importantly, understand myself better and repair my character.
I really consider myself as an emotional self-aware person. I have been through some shit myself, but I always managed to behave quite normally because I understand where my behavior or trauma came from. My daddy issues are one of the few things that, even though I am aware of them and the behavior they provoke, I cannot prevent this behavior. It is as if my inner child always wins from my logical mind. I guess that’s how deep these daddy issues are rooted
I can relate very much to this… When I was little my parents split up because my dad was doing drugs and was getting in a lot of trouble… And after the divorce I only saw him about 10 times after that… I don’t have all of these damaging values for example I’m not promiscuous, but I definitely have self-esteem issues I never really tied my self-worth and image to my daddy issues but now I’m perusal this article I think we might have had something to do with it… But I definitely can say that healing is possible, it was a long bumpy road but I got there and I’ve learned to not hate myself.
In recent times the best thing about understanding the consequences of my daddy issues is that my superpower has become “reading people”. This has enabled me to open up to the right person, at the right time, and I have “chosen” family members that are significantly better for my health and development! Never deemed it possible.
In the past I never really had problems out of my dad, but recently he been causing more problems for everyone especially me, who used to look up to him. Without going into details, he used something that I earned from all my hard work in College Art behind my back. When I start investigating about what happened to it, he finally spoke up about after months after he used it. I can forgive him eventually but Ill never forget it.
Our relationship is better now, but growing up, my father could be really cruel and gaslighting. I was always compared to his friends other sons that were into sports when I wasn’t or he would always whine and guilt trip me to get what he wanted. He didn’t even have the guts to stand up to my mom when she would be in an abusive and drunk mood. remember, men like my grandfather, and guys like my uncle Andrew (heck, even Optimus prime; in fact, his next board is from Peter Cullen, himself in regards to his brother, who was the former Marine, named Larry.) raised me old school, but I learned what it meant to be strong, but gentle. Proud to say, therapy has helped me out when it comes to dealing with these old wounds. I got a good paying job. I live on my own for the very first time in my life and I’m learning the value of responsibility and independence. Thank you for all the amazing content guys. Its really helped me out as well.
I’m glad that it’s being talked about, though one thing that’s a gripe for me is people using the term to put down others (usually women). Whether you do or don’t have daddy issues, it’s becoming more popular to say things like “no father figure” for women acting in a certain way or having personality traits. In the process it just shames people who actually do, as if their experience makes them innately damaged or unfixable. :/
My dad left when I was 2 and moved back to England. My mom remarried my ACTUAL (step) dad when I was 3 and he was amazing and I loved him so much. He was a great parent. But the biological dad never even sent me a birthday card. All I wanted was a birthday card. He made no attempt to make contact with me until I was 18 and no longer a financial responsibility. I refused to talk to him and he died without my forgiveness. My actual dad died a few years ago and I’m still not done grieving. Dads are really important guys, if you have a good one let him know and give him a hug while you still can!
My father had an absent father, emotionally and physically absent. I have a physically present dad, sometimes absent cause he went for studies however an emotionally absent one. He provided for us to his bests we know. He had to work hard so he wasn’t engaged with my personal life. My childhood memories was filled with him thrashing me with sandals, cane stick and what not. He was always angry with me saying I was not a good obedient studious child. I am 27 and till today I cried of my emotionally unfulfilled needs which I am not able to address directly to him. I feel emotionally unsafe, unsettled, anxious around him and my bests times in my life was when I moved out for higher studies. I excelled and pass with distinction and was doing soo good with my extra curricular friends everything. Until I moved back due to Covid. Ever since I have been diagnosed with medium depression and crying to this point!! I worked for dead end jobs. I am unemployed cause I couldn’t bear with it. I am desperate to move out of this house, I have been trying but I still couldn’t. Writing this with tears in my eyes!!
One thing that saved me is that I found a father figure in a friend, from then it was an incredible and liberating tought, that I dont seek approval anymore. That just changed my life, became increasily productive, and even it improved my social skills, that acceptance was just one of the best things
I can’t take rejection at all from romantic interests or father figures. It reconfirms that I’m unlovable. I know it’s not true, but it feels like something is wrong with me so it’s easier to self isolate rather than try to have a romantic relationship. I’m not healthy enough to do it right now. I ended up being diagnosed with Major Depressions and CPTSD so I just can’t right now. I get too attached too easily.
I never had a father figure. He left when i was young and up until now, he never came back. I cried about it before, yet I never thought that his absence would leave a terrible scar on my life. I’m currently seeking help from the school counselor, because I suffer with depression. Thanks Psych2Go, I am genuinely opened about the idea that maybe his absence is one of the contributing aspects of me seeing myself as awful and hopeless.
my dad consistently pops in and out of my life, and it really messes with my mental. i’ve noticed that whenever my dad is present within my life, my behavior and mood chances, like i feel comfortable more relieved, i output a lot of positivity towards others. but when my dad is gone, it’s a complete 180, i’m really a horrible person, making people feel just at horrible as i do, and just genuinely being an asshole to everyone around me, i usually sleep in a lot but when my dad is gone i don’t get enough sleep, i find myself just staying awake a lot. just the little things, that i’ve noticed when my dad is present verses not being present. i think i really needed some kind of comfort after my dad blatantly telling me he’s leaving me again for personal reasons, which really hurt a lot since i felt like i was having a good time. thanks for your words, i needed it today.
This article hits close to home, as someone who had daddy issues it wasn’t a good experience at all I always try to do things to make my dad happy and it wasn’t working at all and he would criticize me every time about everything it wasn’t good and it lead me so vulnerable in the past because if any guy who could be a father figure or was a father figure complimented me or said positive and support things about me I would cry tears of happiness because my dad never said those things to me
When I was a child I loved my father so much. I spent all my childhood waiting for him to be present in my life and justifying his absence, neglect and shaming. As I was growing older, shaping my personality and slowly realising the truth he became more critical and abusive screaming to my face telling me what a terrible daughter I was. The irony was that I think that was the time I received the most attention from him. Now I am an adult and I have kicked him out of my life for good, he doesn’t deserve me. I act like I don’t care and I haven’t dated in a long time but I know my inner child craves for the validation, attention, love and acceptance she didn’t get. I struggle with socialising and I feel very lonely. I want to heal.
How hurtful to know that this could be the outcome for my infant child due to her absentee father. Today she enjoyed play and connection only to end up in tears as he left her side to be with his new younger wife. One cannot underestimate the value of a stepfather and so I will supplement for the void her dad has left. ❤
i always feel insecure and i have a low self-esteem. i always seek for validation. it’s so hard to appreciate myself, like impossible. i have been dating 2 times let alone being in a situations. i thought someone might start rumors that im a h03 or something but im really just finding someone to comfort me. i experience absent dad as a teenager and abusive dad as a child. at this point, looking at this article is enough to make me cry cz just how relatable it is to me
I was raised in a family of 9 members, meaning that I didn’t even felt noticeable enough to my parents. With that being said my father is one of the worst people in my life, even though my siblings might not see the same. They think that he’s a better father because he doesn’t hit us, but he did hit me twice in my childhood beside all the rage and anger and name calling and I can feel how much he is disgusted with me . He didn’t change he is still the same, sometimes I just pray that he vanishes from our lives because it would be so much better. My mom deserves a better husband and we deserve a better father
My parents fought since I was a child until I was still a teenager because of a third party. I was always anxious. Observing what he does without realizing. I was my mom’s shoulder when he feels angry and upset about my dad. (I was still a child though but my mom has no one to turn to but me cause as her daughter, I was always there for her.) Besides the fact that we are not really that financially stable and she has to raise 5 of us, my dad basically didn’t care that much. I slowly realized the result of what happened. I wanted to love but my wall was built so high and for such a long time, it’s hard for me to break from it. I did tried before online but I was anxious. I kept thinking of my flaws and I worry if I was enough. If what I’m doing is enough. Everything was fine but because of that I felt like something was wrong. Kinda like what I experienced with my parents. My mom did EVERYTHING for the family. I can’t for the life of me understand why my dad can’t see and appreciate that. I have less problem sexually. Like, get attracted to someone sexually without a problem but it doesn’t mean I sleep with them. I just don’t have a problem in that type of attraction. When it comes to the actually feeling of “Love”, that is what I kinda struggle with cause it involves your vulnerable side. I have less crushes as I grew older. I’m not a romantic person. I don’t want flower, candies and sweet words. Just show me who you really are without the lovey dovey parts because I will know.
Idk man.. My real father committed suicide and my stepfather abused me almost every day growing up, made me feel worthless. Of course I started doing drugs and had trouble with my identity and emotions. Now I am almost 30 and have grown so much from the whole experience. Staying sober and living healthy. I find it really hard to find a partner though.. We all have our challenges in life, it is your choice if you want to face it or not. Stay strong people.
My father never rlly showed me as much affection as my mother did, and I also don’t feel comfortable enough to act spoiled towards him either. We just grow apart, and the more I grow, the more I hate him, he was getting more toxic over the years, even my brother dislike him we even try to avoid having dinner together with him. My mother and father are not the best role models, so I tried my best to grow strong and become one for my little brother. I overcame manic depression and traumas with no pills, no therapy, only resource being the internet. It worked out, ngl I’m hard to break, but it still gets tiring, and as school is back again, I feel like I’m on the verge of just going back to that dark phase again
I understand not once in my 22 years did my father ever tell me I love you, son. Never showed any affection, never ruffled my hair, or slapped me on the back. Or say hey sons it’s tough, but you’ll get there. The only time he showed emotion was when he was pissed off with me. He has 4 children from two marriages and he was a bad father to us all. The one thing I wanted my whole life was his approval. I never got it. And he will probably die before he ever gives it to me.
I used to have a good relationship with my father But then one day things had changed I don’t know if it’s me or him or both but nowadays we became less like best friends and more like Master and servant One mistake from me and he’ll lash out He even borrowed my money and paid me back too late when I needed it the most Just to fulfill his dream of perusal a concert. Leaving me with no other plans left in life And yet despite that I couldn’t find it in my broken heart to hate him Maybe because of the old times we were so close? Or more like I pity him each day Now as he grows older and older one day he won’t be here anymore, same with my mom I don’t know what else to do with my life Maybe I should just find a truck to run me over to end it all
I would say, in actively trying to protect my mom at one point when in elementary school, I’ve noticed I’ve engrained a deep protectiveness in myself for those I know (doesn’t matter how long). I feel this attribute greatly ties into my ego, and knowing I probably wouldn’t fare well in a physical fight seems to amplify my need to be more “masculine”. So I suppose, in having a donkey-butt of a father, I’ve raised myself to feel I should take on the roles of a good one.
My father was in china for most of my life, so my brother (27 at the time) was my “father figure.” But he yelled at me a lot and made me feel like i was always in the wrong, so naturally since i was 10 at the time i grew a fear of him and tried to avoid him as much as possible. Idk if that would count as daddy issues but that definitely made a dent in my mental health
My father wound(s) are complex and I’ve given it a lot of my mental attention lately as I sift through general attachment stuff and working on myself to not attract yet another horrible partner or even someone to date. I’m an anxious attachment style And it suuuucks. Anyone else have parents divorce but dad stayed present and involved ? But moms new partner was present from the get go and experienced explosive anger and abuse towards themselves and their siblings? But my dad was a phone call away and never once hesitated to do what could. Once I married (a copy of my stepfather) my relationship with my dad became strained over time. This has affected me as well. Our relationship now is texting about music and checking in because of his health, and me hosting holiday dinners.
I grew up without a father and now as a mother with my own children, both their fathers are absent. As a daughter it didn’t bother me much because I didn’t know him but I always craved having a father in my life. I was 22 when I had my first and 26 when I had my second and dropped out of school and became a full time mother to both my kids. I am being emotionally and physically present in my kids lives and tomorrow my daughter turns 5 and ive never missed a single birthday
Idk if I have daddy issues or not, my dad was always there for me when I was a kid, but as soon as my sister got born ( I was 8) he started caring for her now, I don’t want to be childish, as a teen now I get jealous when he treats her better, when he hugs her& stand in her side,he never hugs me the way he does to her, so as everything
My daddy issues manifest into nuking my relationship and leaving but wanting to come back. I never knew how bad they were when until I talked to my 2 brother 10 and 11 years younger than me and my sister. My dad hated my mom and that seeped into how he treated us. He remarried and had 2 more children, the boys he always wanted. The convo I had with my brother took place a month ago, early December. I went to pick something up from them. At this point I had cut contact with my father for good. I’m 34 and they are now 24 and 22. They didn’t understand why he treated me and my sister the way he does. I said it’s because he hates our mother. At that moment I realized he hated us.
My father abandoned us to start a new family when I was 11 years old and it really took a deep toll on me My mother went through severe depression during that time and my sister emotionally closed off from people. I was stuck in between feeling everything and nothing at all Today I’m 20 years old and have developed anxiety, smiling depression and PTSD Psych2Go really helps me better navigate my new emotions and try to conquer my silent battles 1 day at a time Thank you so much Psych2Go for the content you create It really does help and makes a difference for people like me And for all those fathers out there or men who one day aspire to be fathers: You don’t understand the amount of weight you have on our lives and how you’re very presence shapes us to be the people we are today. Don’t take that kind of responsibility for granted, you are needed and valid With regards to my situation it hurt ALOT Bc i was just a kid, I didn’t understand what happened and why he left. As a child you think it’s your everything that happens is your fault and that causes me to be a control freak and panic when I can’t control anything around me as an adult. I would love to see more articles on this topic as it’s a struggle that alot of adults and most especially children have or still are facing today🙏🏽🙏🏽
It was always my mom and I. My mom tried to have my dad involved but he was an alcoholic. Luckily we didn’t live together. My mom and I lived with my grandma. Sometimes he was there but most of the times he wasn’t. He moved to Las Vegas when I was in 7th grade and we visited him once. Ofc my parents fought. He’s not an alcoholic anymore and he married someone else. We at least talk once week and I’m opening up to him more. I’m happy for him, but wish he could’ve been there for my mom and I.
Very interesting article, thank you. I watched this article not because I have daddy issues myself, but because I was dating a girl with daddy issues. The amount of things she was willing to do just to be with me were insane. She lived in another country and I rizzed her up via instagram. She would literally fly to me weekly and I wanted her not come to me but I wanted to come to her and not make her put in so much effort as a gentleman you know. Fast forward, things didnt really go well and I supposed it was best for us to go our separate ways. She would contact my friends and family and she would send my friends messages in which she was threatening to hire someone to end me. Crazy no? So I reached out to her to ease the situation. She told me she was gonna come see me again tomorrow and fly. I told her dont come I wont be there to pick u up at the airport, it’ll be a waste of ur time. Next day, she was in front of my door, this girl drove all the way to my house, mind you, she lives in another country, she drove 10+ hours one way to see me. And she came back two times again that same week. Long story short, we didnt work out, surprisingly🤣. But the thing that was the weirdest about all this was the fact that here is this beautiful 10/10 on a bad day girl, doing all these things for a guy like me, I’m but a humble peasant hahah. She fell in love with me so hard and so quick that it made me feel uncomfortable and it felt kinda fake to me, even though it was real to her. Nowadays she is getting passed around and clapped by professional fighters from One FC.
It’s a different story but my dad never abused me and he’s been with me my whole life, but we never were close growing up. He is an alcoholic, however even though he isn’t an abusive one, part of the reason we don’t have a close relationship is because of the fact he drinks a lot. This kind of hits me hard.
I have what people call “daddy issues” but I never understood the behaviors women show that do have daddy issues. I have never found it appealing at all to date men older than me, have sex a lot to close the gap of love that’s missing from my father, I’ve never felt depressed about having daddy issues, I’ve always had self-respect for myself, I have never had a problem tossing people out of my life that have disrespected me and that includes my father, I have always found calling men “daddy” to be so disgusting and cringe. I do tend to get a long with people older than me, but only due to their maturity. Sometimes I rarely do have friends my age but that’s because I can tell they have a good head on their shoulders. Nobody taught me these things, neither of my parents are emotionally available and aren’t even remotely interested in me and my life. I am who I am because I’ve had a lot of time to self reflect and love from honest, good, and mature friends.
I’m not sure if this actually counts but, my dad has a habit of yelling/getting angry at me especially on Sundays, and he tells me to apologize to my brother when he cries, but when me or my brother cries, he won’t apologize, and when we ask him to, he says “BECAUSE IM THE FATHER!” And his tone is often loud or yelling. And he recently doesn’t say goodnight or love you when he’s angry sometimes. And he always says I blame other people, when I don’t. Once, I asked him, “Can you apologize?” He said “NO, I DONT NEED TO!” And when asked why, again, he’s said because he was the parents. Once, I was yelled at on my birthday when I was young, I was spanked that day. My father slapped my brother once because he was smiling or giggling during prayer and said “it wasn’t that hard.” When it was pretty loud. He has taught me that if I don’t fix what I did immediately, then I don’t mean it when I constantly say “IM SORRY, IM SORRY!”….he even threatened to “pull off” me and my brothers ears, just to scare us. He often threatened abuse when we were misbehaving to scare us. Im not sure if my situation is as bad as others, and I’m sorry for those who’s situations are worse than mine, I hope I’m okay….but I for some reason don’t want to get my father in trouble because I don’t want to hurt him, but I guess my father does not mind hurting me.
Unless you’re from the country India. In that culture females are closer now to their fathers and sons are closer to their mothers. Sons will share intimate thoughts about relationships with women with their mother, seeking female advice, and daughters will do the same with their fathers, nothing is off-limits, they encourage this in their children to be open, and they are honest with their children without prejudice. The parents do this because if they can release and help their children grow in a family structure it makes the rest of their life at work and social events and achievements much easier, so they will put their sexual pride aside and give advice whether it suggests their children change or there is something wrong with the person they feel intimate about. They will understand their children and not social norms so that their children can make the correct choices and not resent the opposite sex because their parents deceive them. A great philosopher said that those who look up to you when they are young, will resent you when they grow old. So if you’re from India and you have daddy issues? Would that really mean that you have mother issues, if you’re from a western society it is reversed and men that don’t understand women give their sons advice about women. Psychology is some crazy shit, they only implement the human and sexual factor not cultural and regional and atmospheric and diet etc. etc.
i remember knowing exactly what happened as a child when i find out abt my father’s secret family but i pretend that i didn’t know what is happening. this went for a while until i got to high school i can’t pretend to lie to myself anymore so i began to accept it. but, i have this toxic trait of attention seeking someone who hurt me this happened when i was bullied i do hate them but i also want their attention and for them to like me i felt like i have to prove something to them. i did the same for my father like i do dislike him but i also want his attention. whenever he’s throwing a tantrum i felt like screaming at him when he ask me to do stuff for him (wash his dishes serve him food etc.) i felt like screaming at him but at the same time i also want his attention i am also weirdly attracted to older men and when ppl joke abt cheating (esp male cheating) i always get triggered but if i voice my opinion i would be the party pooper im so mad at myself idk why even tho its not my fault but the voice in my head always convince me that it is and for the longest time i always blame myself for everything but recently im done blaming myself and i chose to forgive myself andi thought everything will become okay from now on but the voice in my head convince me that i always blame everyone except me when i omly recently want to stop blaming myself like what abt be4 when i blame myself for everything? i asked my mom to see a doctor but i don’t think she’s bringing me there anytime sooner im slowly rotting and i can’t do anything abt it im also irritatingly perfectionist which sucks.
my dad was in the navy for the first 13 years of my life longer for my sisters and it’s hard to connect with him and his fam i’ve only met my grandfather 4 times before he passed and as much as i try to connect with him it’s rlly hard we don’t rlly have common interests other than the navy and law enforcement and politics but it’s not like my sister where he takes her to f1 races the most he does with me is just take me to dance he’s never taken me out of state to enjoy something together i know he served our country but i wish he was their in my life also cos i only saw him once a week minusing me waking up at 3am to say goodbye and staying up till 12 to say goodnight
I’m a girl and my mother divorced my father when I was in elemental school. My father was never interested what I was doing at school, he always was late at celebration, he didn’t go to school events and he don’t spend with us holidays very often. He even said that I would go to work after school and he didn’t know I wanted to study on college. There was time that I missed him, but that was years ago. But I notice that I’m scared to be close with men, because I worried if they will be like my father. I worried if I get to close they will treat me bad of if I will be scared to be alone that I will repeat my mother mistake and I will marry the first man who isn’t good to me. I also was sexually teased on middle and high school so my scare is doubled. I want to be with man who will love me for who I am, but did I find one? Or I will end up alone? How I know who is good or bad for me?
I never really had any father son bonding time, I learned to ride a bike myself, learned to tie my shoes from my sister. And I re-learned to tie my shoes from my mother, any time there was an opportunity for him to teach me something, he would do it himself and complain about me right Infront of me. He constantly brings up the bad things about me and is embarrassed of me being his son (confirmed by my father himself), he would always bring up that my grades would be parallel to my future and how he would treat me. Yeah sure he puts food on the table and gives me shelter, but the thing is, he does that because he has to, not because that he loves me. If he loved anyone in the world, it would be my sister and my mom, he would always compare me to other kids and say right Infront of me, “I definitely prefer daughters over sons, look how this one turned out”. I am 100% sure his so called “love” for me isn’t true. He always replies with a “ugh, what” when I try to talk to him. But to my other siblings, he goes “yes sweetie?”. This may just be me being dramatic but the little things still hurt.
My dad shows signs of psychosis, i.e. loss of touch with reality, no insight, no followship, delusions of self importance or fake success. Plus on the other side he has his mother and 5 sisters petty female habits of spying, eavesdropping, gaslighting, kitchen laundry interference, inferiority and jealousy. Plus hes super religious so any form of expression was a no no in his house hold, and it made him extremely miserly, to the point where i had to feed him and clean his house basically until i put a stop to it, and of course his rage he would break and throw stuff. Basically every kind of abuse aside from sexual abuse. In this day and age even this kind of father is much better than a sexually abusive one. But yeah ive started to come to terms with my daddy issues. It hurts to look at myself but thats how i get over myself….
I’m fairly certain that I have parental issues in general. My parents divorced (rather messily and langthily) when I was very little. I was raised by a prideful and selfish man who told me unnecessary things. Later in my life, he didn’t want me taking a particular medication because of its intended use. He was also unsupportive during my deep depression and anxiety, and then with my chronic migraines. Thankfully, we now live hundreds of miles apart, but my psyche is damaged.
Never met my father but we used to talk on the phone when i was a child, i was 13 when he asked me to stop calling cause he has his own family and its not fair to his children…i promise i never called again but something changed in me which adult me now knows is feeling worthless and not good enough. I know im worthy but the feeling never goes away. Just my little moment lol
When I think about my childhood then I remember that my father was either asleep all day or screaming/yelling at me (or my sisters, but mostly at me, the oldest child). He works as a baker and that means he worked in the middle of the night, so when he came home he was going to bed and slept 🛌. So mostly he was asleep when he was home, but it also happened that he was awake and suddenly started yelling or screaming at me without me knowing why he was so angry at me or what I did wrong and I always started crying and felt ashamed and bad, because I knew from my mother that „adults only are mad at children if they did something wrong” 😢. At that time I didn’t understood why he was the way he was, but as I grew older I found out why and that was because he was stressed from work. He really has a passion for his job and so he wanted to do his best at it, to make it „perfect” and when he couldn’t do that for whatever reason (to much work, lazy coworkers, . . . ) he got very frustrated/angry about that and since he can’t let out his frustration/anger at work, he did it at home 🤬 and so it happened that no matter what I or my sisters did (even for the smallest things) he started yelling/screaming at us and ended up only yelling at me, because he could only focus on 1 of his 3 children (my sisters stayed in the background and could just disappear after some time without him even noticing it) so there were also days were I had to take all the blame even if it was not my fault 🤦🏼♀️ and he didn’t just yell at me for like 10 minutes, oh no, he yelled at me for like 3 hours on a good day 😅 and the only thing I could do as a little girl was to stand right in front of him, listen to his painful words towards me and cry, without knowing why he was yelling at me !
my dad was not very present (we worked out of the country) and when we was present we’d yell a lot and critique every little thing. it got better overtime, he stills works out of the country, we get along better now and he buys us stuff, but is still hurts. whenever he raises his voice or complains i feel like breaking down. nothing’s good enough for him, but i feel bad talking bad about him, after all he buys us stuff :/
Hey Psych2Go-Team, hey Amanda! This is a bit off-topic….Been a while that I watched your articles – obviously you already answered many of my questions in life 🙂 . The voice-over seems sooooo much faster now and I have difficulties to follow especially theories and hard facts as I am a non-native speaker. Tried the half speed on YT and it sounds pretty bad with hall effect. Is there any chance to slow down a bit again? 🙂
My father was raised by a single mother. As a result, despite his military service, he is paranoid, closeminded, and entitled, and it causes him to have problems maintaining romantic relationships. That may be because he was never taught to display his masculine traits in a healthy manner due to him living without a father who was present in the household.
My father was always present-absent, we got along very well when I was little, but when I fell in love and told him about this boy, a nightmare began, starting with many hits and insults, calling me like a “5lut” just for falling in love with someone and little by little our relationship It broke and today it still does not improve and is getting worse.
My dad I wouldn’t say is abusive, yet just angry. Having a father with anger issues as a kid is not fun, especially when said father has a knack for lashing out at you and your younger brother. This went on for as long as I can remember until my parents divorced a year ago. I’m 13 now, and not ready to forgive my father for all of what he’s done, all the yelling and screaming and making me and my brother fear him. He’s trying to repair our relationship, but I’m still not sure if I can forgive him. I would call this daddy issues but just issues, but that’s my opinion at least
I thought I had daddy issues because I really don’t get love and attention from my father and my father is a very rough and bad-mannered person. But I am exactly the opposite of your interpretation, that is, I consider myself important and I love myself, I am social and I always look at myself as the hero of my life, (of course I must say that when I was baby girl, I played with my father and I loved him and that He loved me), can it be for this that I have self confident know?
I used to feel close to my dad but now he feels like a stranger in my life, he helped me out of a situation with my other parent but he keeps on letting me down i love my dad i really do but im beginning to despise him like when i see him im constantly saying im my head that i hate him and that i don’t want to be anything like him in the future but i don’t know where this cones from 💔
my dad drinks all week and lost his job a few months ago, but found another one, he still drinks even on work days the night before he leaves,i feel so unsafe around him i distance myself from him he doesnt even feel like a dad to me, hes home on the weekends and just drinks, thats why i hate coming home from school on the last weekday 🙁
My dad was around, he just chose to ignore me in favor of doting on my little sister. He liked to start fights with me over my not wanting to be at his house because he was ignoring me. He never tried to spend time with me. He bitched and complained about everything I was interested in. One time he promised to come to my water polo game and he stayed until we got in the pool to warm up and then went and bought himself a new truck instead of perusal me play. Once I had a 3 day tournament out of town and I asked for $100 to feed myself over the weekend and he only gave me $20. The only reason I didn’t starve over the weekend is because someone’s mom felt bad enough for me that she bought my meals. But when I came home from the tournament we had a brand new tent trailer sitting in the driveway! Because we needed a tent trailer more than I needed to eat! When I was 8 I broke my arm and when my mom was telling him to come to the ER he asked her to put him on speaker so he could tell me “sorry, I have to pit crew on my buddy’s car at the race track”. He shafted me for a stupid car! Now I get shafted for his wife’s grandkids. I’ll call him up and try to spend time with him “sorry, the grandkids have a race in tulare” “sorry we’re taking the grandkids camping” “sorry, we’re taking them to seaworld”. One of the last times I talked to him my sister was taking pictures and he was like “why do you need all these pictures?” And she said “memories! You won’t be around forever” and he replied “well I tried to make memories but none of you wanted to race :/”
Definitely not a good thing for the kids to grow up with only one biological parent, good thing that there are no country with groups having over 70% of kids born out of wedlock, that doesn’t have an impact and it’s bad to even mention it, 50% in other groups are also insanely high, but it’s probably fine 🫣
Daddy issues are real in my life and my mom never understand it. He left when we were young and occasionally come back after five years for only two weeks 😂😂😂. He was never there when u talk with him on the phone he he says words that really hurt and swears we not his kids. I stopped talking to him n it helped me a little bcz I learnt to control my emotions n I believe he is a strong causer of my emotional imbalance……it’s sad as it contribute to my love life I always disconnect from my lovers or I just disapper. I specifically don’t approve of a lot of things I hope to get better
When I was younger (2-4 year old) I was With My dad always, and when I turned 10 and at the New years me and My dad werent really cloae anymore and, I felt like A nobody, I was More into older Men and I daited A 18 year old adult Man and he didnt even like me, rn My dad is trying To be better but I kinda got A small trauma of him, I always fear that he’ll shout at me, he was never abusive but kinda strict which made My depression worse and worse, right now im daiting A 17 year old girl and she deeply loves me, and I love her I can see by her bidy language and her life that, she needs ne and the support, and she knows I need the support and understanding and we help each other, even tho.. We cant really help each other much but we try:)
My parents have been divorced since 2015 at that time I was 4 years old I didn’t understand what happened after they got divorced I didn’t see my dad until I was 10 years old I feel very awkward with my friends dads I always see how they act with their children when I see that I always say in my head was it that hard father, everything they said in the vid I have
I honestly don’t know if I have daddy issues or not, because my dad was, and is around still. He drives me to school, volleyball, and lives with my family. But he has so many issues that growing up he would constantly threaten to leave us with my overworked mom, he yelled at us, never hit us but would freak out and start screaming at as if we didn’t finish out food in a certain amount of time, or at all, ect, but my dad can also be so funny and sweet, but he switches between the moods so much it’s weird. I want to laugh and have fun with him, but two seconds later he will yell at me for dropping something, then it’s back to normal and he’s laughing? It’s just so exhausting and I never know if we have a good relationship or not, he’s always yelling, or he’s always making jokes. Literally NO in between. I guess my question is, do I have daddy issues, or am I being dramatic ?
I have daddy issues, my father wasn’t the best and had mainly told me throughout my life that I need to stop showing emotion and to stop being a bitch and to stop being like my mom. I have been on a long journey that has lasted almost a year in bettering myself and fixing the behaviour that my father had with me so that I can be a better older brother, its painful to see myself fall back and act like my father, this feels like I’m just saying words without meaning like I don’t deserve it to say anything because it feels wrong, I don’t know what I’ll do if I fail, how do I find myself and do this, why am I lost, I’ll stop I’m sorry, please be better than me and my father, be better always and never stop improving as it is always worth it, have a good night everyone and sleep well.
I have a dad.. but I have a covert narcissist mother. She is jealous of my sister and I and does not allow my dad to spend time with us alone. They would scold me because I’ve always dated older men. I’ve always been hyper independent and hard working, but always sought men minimum 10-15 years older. I had bfs in their 40s in my 20s. Guess I was looking for a dad lol
i don’t know those this acounts but. when i was 1 year old my father left me from my young age and i didn’t know why exacly. my mom told me years ago of that i had a real dad but he never much cared. i have seen him sometime like years ago when i was on a 2th grade i saw him on my birthday with someone and i didn’t relise who it was nore my dad after my mom expleind i then toke it as a good news. i got even to visit my father only one time and then last time i try to calling him but then he hang up on my middle of talking to him and that hurt me a lot. i felt betryd from my father and felt so much hate and sadness in me that i didn’t care about my father anymore and even uncontrolable men. i just hated him so much… if this is called “Daddy Issues” then i do have a problem then
My parents divorced when I was very young. He was abusive verbally, mentally and sometimes physically. I am an only child. On the days he was supposed to spend time with me, he would pick me up, drop me off at his mother’s house. Go back to his house with his girlfriend. Then hours later, he would pick me up, take me to dinner, then take me home.
I think mommy issues are more common than daddy issues people just don’t talk about it and because it’s so common people just don’t bother doing anything about it anytime I say the literal word abuse to someone the first thing they think about is daddy issues 🙄 there’s more to abuse than physical and alcoholic harm I think it’s also because people think woman can’t actually cause that much harm. For someone who has mommy issues and daddy issues I feel like mommy issues are worse because she’s the one who gave birth to me and should’ve loved me from the very beginning…
We, collectively, now (and have for a while now) live in a society that mocks and degrades and obliterates fathers and fatherhood! More than this, men are a bit run-down in society. This running down has done little to correct fatherlessness, spousal abuse, child abuse, and sexual abuse… Everything stated here pretty much simply sums it up.
Funny how my dad just quit and left, never came back, now i have a kid of my own, and my daughter has no clue how fun it is to have a dad (me) even if im a serious dad. Im the bad cop in my relationship with my wife and its hard when she thinks i dont love her even if i repeatedly express that i do. I hope im not fcking her up!
My whole childhood my dad has been not there for me he always laid to me about my mother, he always promises to send me money but never does and he doesn’t even know my birthday. I wish he could be more around but he is busy with his other family, sometimes my mum doesn’t even have money for other things and l always see my dad with his family buying expensive things I am turning 13 soon and l don’t how to feel cause he will never care for me, love me. But he asked me this if u grow up will u send me money and stuff l never him. Sometimes l am so sad that l try to hide my feelings from my mum the only person who loves me
Society these days seems to undervalue the importance of fathers and focus on “Mother knows best.” Depictions of them often show them as incompetent, idiotic, or the usual absent. But a REAL father is anything but those. Men are naturally built to be protectors and providers, going in and doing the hard stuff for the sake of others, especially their loved ones. Fathers should be no different. They are the ones who guide their children and prep them for the real world, being the pillar of support during tough times, amd the barrier when danger shows up. It’s our responsibility as men. Those who run at the first sight of a positive pregnancy test are fools who deny this responsibility out of selfishness. I can assure you, those who do that are not real men. They’re boys in men’s skin.
Can someone please explain about the not wanting to use protection part ? When I get involved with a selective man I don’t use protection the first sexual encounter and on because I desire a deep feeling of intimacy and noticed that I can’t never feel that with anyone sexually or in any other aspect except my self sexually but writing this just made me realize I want intimacy with others but reality is my soul and body is asking this because it’s lacking intimacy so how do we heal this from a place of understanding that we didn’t receive intimacy from my mother and father ?
Yeah I did my father was abusive and a rapist and it’s painful so I guess I have daddy issues huh? Me and my big brother I know it’s not my fault I am scared of men especially after being sexually assaulted by one I’m a female and I struggle I don’t know if I have depression but I am suffering from bullies and self harm…
In today’s society it couldn’t be more important to be exposed to a healthy form of masculinity These days misandry is fairly accepted and without that healthy masculinity in your life all you may know about masculinity is what feminists will tell you (which is mainly the negative side), especially if you grow up with a (single) mother who’s spiteful of men As a daughter without a healthy father figure you’ll probably believe what you hear about how toxic masculinity is (which it’s not, just like femininity in itself isn’t toxic) And as a son it can shape you to be more feminine (which isn’t necessarlily a bad thing), but once you realize how you’ve been shaped and molded not to be masculine you might develope a hatred for women which is equally harmful as a hatred for men Obviously I’m not an expert, but I’d argue that it’s quite an issue that fuels the gender war and we should be aware of that
I really hate this phrase “daddy issues” and this mistaken notion of an Oedipal complex, I didn’t ask for a father who would verbally berate me and say disgusting shit he believed about my mother and me. That’s my dad’s fucked up mind. I’ve come to accept that he’s sabotaged my life, not only when he isn’t there and I’ve dealt with the residual effects (self-loathing) but whenever I’ve been around him. You are basically a hostage until you can leave. I remember the man would encourage me to find a job and then wouldn’t hesitate to scream in my face when I answered the phone. Still trying to figure out how to deal with a father who considers me an enemy. It really boils my blood what a piece of shit he is.
The woman who narrates these articles has a lot of education, helpful information and wisdom about whatever the subject is and a platform that can potentially reach millions of people and help them become more self aware. These vids are great . However, the volume of her voice is so low that it’s really difficult to hear her . Especially, if there is ambient noise in the room you are perusal from. Would it be possible for her to speak louder and more clearly please?
Would be interested to know what close Friends and especially potencial Partners of Daddy-Issue People can do to improve their Lives. Knew a fantastic, wonderful, sweet Girl, who suffers/suffered from this. Did the best i could imagine back then and tried to fill the Gap while also “rewrite” her Memories of how a good Daddy should be 🙂 She had strong anxiety attacks when i came into contact with her and these attacks became less and less over time…. so i guess my method had some positive Effects on my sweet Girl :3 ❤ But what is the viewpoint of professionals on that? Yeah yeah… therapy is needed…. im aware that psychological traumata should be treated by professionals. But if you love someone, you cant sit around and do nothing. So….. what could a loving Partner do to help their sweet Girl?
Police men no.. i know it will hurt but yall are adding to the fear.. firefighters emts hospitals are great things we just need to focus on the problem at hand. In nature people will want to fill those jobs for the sake of survival mabye drones could ship all the small supplys until we start creating a better system