Court-ordered marriage counseling is a legal process that requires military couples to attend counseling sessions to address their relationship issues. This process can be conducted in various situations, such as direct payments exceeding 50 of disposable retired pay divided as property, garnishment orders (such as child support or alimony), and valid court orders certifying the service member’s obligations. Military and family life counselors (MFLCs) and child and youth behavioral military and family life counselors (CYB-MFLCs) provide confidential non-medical counseling, consultation, and relationship checks.
In most states, a legal separation is a civil court order that does not legally end a marriage but allows the court to issue orders concerning division of property, spousal support, and other matters. The Defense Department offers various free counseling support for married service members and their families, stating that seeking support is a sign of strength.
If a judge orders marriage counseling, it is crucial that both spouses attend. In the context of a divorce case, a Family Judge holds the authority to order the couple to attend counseling before granting a divorce. Military One Source and Military and Family Life Counseling provide free, short-term, confidential non-medical counseling services for a wide range of issues. Therapists are typically legally and ethically required to keep information confidential.
A judge cannot force a couple to remain married, but they can contest it and see if the judge may order or ask for counseling or mediation. While a suit for divorce is pending, the Court may order the parties into marriage counseling with a person named by the Court. Tricare may cover marriage counseling for military families, providing eligibility, sessions, and mental health support.
| Article | Description | Site |
|---|---|---|
| Military Relationships Counseling and Support | Free and confidential non-medical counseling and other programs provide professional support for military couples with relationship concerns. | militaryonesource.mil |
| Rights as a Military Spouse (Army, reserve, National Guard … | His command cannot force him to give you anything money-wise, without a court order. … The military can‘t force him into marriage counseling, … | city-data.com |
| Understanding Confidential Non-medical Counseling … | Military OneSource and Military and Family Life Counseling provide free, short-term, confidential non-medical counseling services for a wide range of issues. | militaryonesource.mil |
📹 TRUTH About RESTRAINING ORDERS that will SAVE YOUR LIFE
TRUTH About RESTRAINING ORDERS that will SAVE YOUR LIFE Article link …
How To Get Marriage Counseling In The Army?
To access free marital counseling as a service member, contact Military OneSource at 1-800-342-9647. They offer up to 12 free counseling sessions, connecting you with counselors familiar with military life and its unique challenges. This confidential, non-medical counseling support aids military couples facing relationship issues. You don’t have to navigate these concerns alone; professional help is available. Additionally, visit the Legal Office for a power of attorney, allowing your spouse to manage affairs during your absence.
Regular relationship checkups facilitate discussions with a Military and Family Life Counselor, providing insights to enhance your relationship. TRICARE covers marriage counseling only when addressing diagnosed mental disorders, so explore the free support options offered by the Defense Department. Utilize marriage orientation and financial counseling at Army Community Service (ACS) and check housing eligibility.
Resources such as the MFLC, chaplains, and ACS classes contribute further support for military members. Confidential counseling services help strengthen relationships amid the stress of deployments, moves, and separations. Prioritize your well-being by accessing these services.
Can Military Wives Go To College For Free?
The GI Bill provides eligible military spouses and dependents with substantial benefits, covering 100% of tuition and fees for public schools up to the maximum in-state tuition or up to $22, 805. 34 annually for private or foreign institutions. For military spouses to access these benefits, they must have the servicemember transfer their benefits. Fortunately, qualified military spouses can attend college for free, though options may be limited. Various programs are available to aid military spouses in their education, but these may not cover all costs or apply to every institution.
Surviving spouses can also access over $300 million in military-related scholarships and grants. The MyCAA program offers financial assistance of up to $4, 000 for eligible spouses pursuing careers in high-demand fields. Additionally, spouses can benefit from education and career planning assistance through resources like DANTES. Although specific eligibility criteria exist, numerous opportunities abound for military spouses seeking to further their education. Overall, understanding available options and navigating the application process can lead to significant educational benefits for military families.
What States Require Marriage Counseling Before Divorce?
As of now, only two states, Alaska and New Jersey, mandate couples to attend marriage counseling before obtaining a divorce. In Alaska, couples must complete a minimum of three counseling sessions, while New Jersey requires just one session. Additionally, there are four states—California, Florida, Michigan, and New York—where counseling is required before filing for divorce, although specific regulations differ in each state regarding the duration and type of counseling necessary.
Notably, Alaska and New Jersey's laws emphasize counseling before divorce proceedings. Some states, such as Florida, have reconciliation counseling laws designed to encourage couples to contemplate saving their marriages. However, many states have no-fault divorce laws, allowing one spouse to file without the other's consent, which can diminish the effectiveness of counseling in certain cases. While most states don’t mandate marriage counseling, courts in some instances may require couples to attend sessions if deemed necessary.
In summary, the requirements for marriage counseling prior to divorce vary significantly across the U. S., with only a handful of states imposing these stipulations to promote reconciliation or provide support during the divorce process.
How Do I Contact A Military Counselor?
The Military and Family Life Counseling Program offers non-medical counseling services to active-duty service members, veterans, and their families, both on and off military installations. Individuals and couples can access face-to-face or telehealth sessions by contacting their installation's Military and Family Support Center. Military OneSource provides 24/7 support, accessible via telephone at 800-342-9647 or live chat, including international options.
For immediate crises, individuals can contact the Military Crisis Line at 988 (press 1), chat online, or text 838255. Each person is eligible for up to 12 free counseling visits, tailored to address unique challenges faced by military families and individuals. Military and family life counselors (MFLCs) also assist with everyday issues and provide confidential consultation. Those without an embedded counselor should call designated support numbers.
Additional resources include contacting Military OneSource or local hotlines for crisis support, such as calling 911 or heading to the nearest emergency room. Accessible support and tools are available year-round to ensure mental health and well-being within the military community. For more information or to schedule an appointment with a counselor, reach out to the provided contacts or visit the Military and Family Life Counseling Guide.
How Can Military Couples Stay Strong Through Life'S Challenges?
Support is available for military couples facing life’s challenges, including free, confidential services through Military OneSource, which can be accessed by calling 800-342-9647 or chatting online. For better communication, consider the Love Every Day tool, which offers fun and meaningful text prompts to connect with your partner. Military life introduces unique challenges like frequent separations, deployments, and sudden schedule changes. To navigate these stresses, couples should prioritize meaningful communication, emotional transparency, and mutual growth.
Establishing "Sacred" time to talk amidst the hectic military schedule is essential. Counselors, peer support, and chaplains can provide assistance during deployments, which are particularly taxing. Understanding and leveraging military regulations and entitlements can help couples manage relocations harmoniously. Strategies shared by military couples suggest that flexibility, strong organizational skills, and emotional intelligence are crucial for relationship stability.
A long-term commitment provides emotional support during tough times. It’s vital to set clear expectations to avoid disappointments. By fostering connections with others who understand their experiences and employing practical strategies, military couples can strengthen their bonds and effectively face the demands of their unique lifestyle.
Can A Military Man Divorce His Wife?
Yes, a soldier can file for divorce while deployed, though specific considerations and complications arise from their military status. Military divorces resemble civilian ones in that the couple must attend court to legally dissolve the marriage and determine asset division and child custody. Service members can access free legal assistance at military installations for mediation and representation.
A critical asset in military divorces is the division of military retirement pay. The Uniformed Services Former Spouses Protection Act (USFSPA) allows for military pensions to be treated as marital property, and ex-spouses may be eligible for benefits such as Tricare or retirement pay under certain circumstances. An important aspect to note is that if a former military spouse remarries, they lose certain non-monetary benefits.
There is typically a 90-day waiting period to finalize a divorce if one or both spouses are active duty, even if they've been living apart. This waiting period must be respected while addressing custody, property, and financial issues. While divorces aren't handled by the military, legal guidance is available, including support from the Judge Advocate General (JAG) Corps. It's crucial for service members to understand their rights and navigate the unique challenges posed by military divorces effectively.
Can A Military Family Life Consultant Help With Marital Problems?
Non-medical counseling resources, available from Military OneSource and the Military Family Life Consultant program, assist service members and their families with marital issues and other challenges. Military OneSource provides free, confidential counseling for a variety of concerns, including preparing for relocations and coping with deployment-related stress. The Military and Family Life Counseling Program offers flexible short-term counseling services through licensed professionals who understand military life challenges.
Adult Military and Family Life Counselors (MFLCs) provide support for service members, spouses, and non-remarried surviving spouses, addressing issues like relationship management, deployment adjustments, and grief. These counselors uphold confidentiality and tailor their services to prevent or mitigate mental health issues. In addition to MFLCs, services are accessible through TRICARE, Chaplains, and civilian providers, ensuring a comprehensive support network for military families.
For those experiencing marital troubles, referrals for off-post counseling are available without command knowledge. The MFLC Program focuses on providing solution-oriented consultations for individuals, couples, and families dealing with a wide range of issues, ultimately enhancing the well-being of military personnel and their loved ones.
Who Does A Military Counselor Support?
Counselors play a vital role in supporting military families, including spouses and children of service members. The Military and Family Life Counseling (MFLC) Program offers free, short-term, non-medical counseling designed to address various challenges such as deployment stress, reintegration, relocation, and family issues. Services are available to active duty, National Guard, and reserve members, as well as their families and survivors. Military OneSource complements these offerings with confidential, face-to-face counseling for marital and family life challenges.
The program provides access to licensed counselors, including Military and Family Life Counselors (MFLCs) and Child and Youth Behavioral Military and Family Life Counselors (CYB-MFLCs), who assist with parenting, relationship enhancement, and stress management. Counselors are available both on military installations and in neighboring communities to ensure accessibility. Their services also include educational presentations to help military families build resilience and coping skills.
Individuals seeking support can access counseling through Military OneSource or local Military Family Support Centers. Additional resources include the 988 crisis hotline for immediate assistance. Overall, the MFLC Program aims to help military service members and their families navigate mental and emotional challenges, promote well-being, and foster healthy relationships.
Does TRICARE Cover Spouse Mental Health?
TRICARE, the healthcare program for military personnel and their families, does cover marriage or couples counseling, but only when it is essential for treating a diagnosed mental disorder. This coverage falls within the broader scope of mental health services, which also addresses various relationship issues. TRICARE ensures that care is medically and psychologically necessary, allowing access to outpatient and inpatient mental health services without requiring referrals or pre-authorizations, except for psychoanalysis.
Additionally, TRICARE provides telehealth options for mental health, allowing virtual access through devices. It covers a range of services, including individual, family, and group therapy sessions, as well as substance use disorder treatments. However, general marriage counseling is not covered unless linked directly to a diagnosed mental health condition. Overall, TRICARE aims to support military families’ mental well-being, making various therapy options available to meet their needs. For comprehensive information, it’s advisable to consult TRICARE’s resources or the Mental Health Care page.
Does The VA Offer Premarital Counseling?
Certain VA hospitals and clinics provide marriage and family counseling, though availability varies. It's advisable to check with your local VA facility for specific offerings. Military OneSource offers free, non-medical counseling for service members and their families, connecting them to licensed professionals after a brief phone screening. Even those not enrolled in VA health care can access some mental health services, including help for PTSD, depression, and anxiety.
While the VA and Vet Centers generally do not offer couples therapy, they can incorporate it into a treatment plan. Many veterans start mental health care with their primary care providers, and marriage counseling can assist them in addressing mental health issues. Additional resources, such as the Military and Family Life Counseling Program, provide free, short-term counseling for individuals and couples, aiding in relationship building and coping with deployment challenges.
Individual, group, marriage, and family counseling resources are available to support veterans facing relationship difficulties. Moreover, Vet Centers provide a range of mental health services to veterans, including confidential marriage and family counseling. Various programs exist to help military couples improve their relationships and navigate mental health challenges effectively.
📹 Army will not longer be able to bind maintenance for wife #defence #maintenance #judgment
Link of judgement https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rzG40vAS2QHjH5ZqPT0GXUW7cLP564I_/view?usp=drivesdk Helpline no …
I was filing a restraining order against a family member. As I was filing out the paper work, the Lord blessed me through a total stranger with a kind word. He seemed to be an attorney and he walked up to me and said, “The Lord put it on my heart to say you wil be ok. ” I was so touched. I was in shock the first time I filed a restraining order. I didn’t know I was to face the defendant. Thankfully my parents were waiting for me during the hearing. I think it’s very important to take a few people with you to file and to the hearing. This let’s the defendant know you have support.
Let people know Tatum, average police response time is 50 minutes, it only takes seconds, to get in a situation that you can lose your life. I’m a convicted felon I made mistakes in the past did my time and have never been back in 12 yrs now. But I always stress and support anyone that can to protect themselves with a firearm, especially a female in that situation. God bless you for speaking the truth. Keep speaking the truth.
Thanks a million, Officer Tatum!!! Could you please do more of these? (This is much more informative and helpful for me than political and media culture type articles.) It is great to understand the “practical side” of Law Enforcement — I will do better in these situations than I would have otherwise. It is greatly appreciated.
I was TRYING to evict my ex boyfriend. He kept threatening & bullying me. I TRIED to get a restraining order. The judge decided to let my ex stay in MY home. As soon as we got home, he threatened me. I went to bed in a panic. I woke up the next morning and discovered I had had a STROKE. Thank you your honor.
I had an ex that threatened me with a RO to try and get back together with me. I didn’t believe she would fill out for a fake RO and ignored her. Next thing I knew I was served, hired an Attorney and had to go to court to defend myself. Even during this time my ex tried to get back together. I proved all this in court and got the RO dropped. I then tried to get the States Attorneys Office to prosecute her for clearly being deceptive, they said if they did then women would be afraid to come forward during REAL abuse cases. There isn’t one side to these stories, man evil shouldn’t be a theme
My dad told me too… don’t pull it unless you intend to use it… bc…if you don’t, the person will take it away from you and use it on YOU. Also, dad told me, aim for the center of the body (don’t aim for an arm or leg) bc if you are off a little bit, you will still hit the target. And get trained in firearm safety.
Absolutely Agree a million times over!! It is my God Given right as a mother to protect my own and myself, if the situation ever arises!! Therefore, that’s exactly why I’m a proud, pistol packin, mama and I will do anything & everything possible to protect my children! If that includes me having to take the life of an attacker or a would be killer, then so be it!!!! My 2A Will Not Be Infringed & I Will Not Comply!! God Bless these families as they mourn & God Bless America 🙏🇺🇸❤🇺🇸🙏
I have filed 2 restraining orders, the first ended in my house being fire bombed and my dog killed and the second ended with myself being chased in my car and being shot at while I was calling the police. A restraining order is only a piece of paper, unless that person respects the order all you are really doing is telling a more than not imbalanced person they can’t have the thing that may be the only thing that they can think of. I have since begun the process of taking gun safety classes before I purchase a side arm and permit to carry it on my person. I do this is full hope that it becomes just an annoying unneeded weight that I carry and never use, but I’d rather treat it like a condom that I’d rather have and never need than to need and not have.
I had a protection order and it saved my life. This is not just a piece of paper Because no matter what the situation is …if he is ever around you or in your home they are required to take him away ..to jail. If I didnt have this piece of paper unless I can show physical harm they will not remove him. This paper finally gave me the power over him. Also I am a huge supporter of owning fire arms but instead of telling a women to get fire arm hand her information on a facility that she can learn to use one and then she can buy one she is comfortable with. Makes all the difference.
Orders of protection or restraining orders work depending on who it’s against. If the abuser is mentally far gone in their quest to maintain control of their partner and has made up their mind to kill their partner…than of course just the order of protection will not protect the petitioner (victim). I’ve worked in family court for over 20 years and orders of protection have been effective in preventing further abuse, not in every case but in most. To tell a victim to get a gun can be dangerous, especially depending on the gun policies of the state they live in. There is a myth that women don’t do jail time (or get light sentences) for killing their abusive partners but the great majority of women in American prisons are due to defending themselves against their abuser. The order of protection needs to be ACCOMPANIED with other reasonable and INDIVIDUAL safety plans. Not all safety plans work for all survivors. If you are a victim of intimate partner violence/domestic violence, please seek the help of a TRAINED DOMESTIC VIOLENCE COUNSELOR who can help you safety plan and actualize that plan. The National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 1-800-799-7233 God bless 🙏
Thank you so much. A judge denied my emergency OP and I am terrified. I live in Chicago, def will be making that purchase. And training because this is really clear and to the point type message. Detective made it clear that the piece of paper isn’t going to protect me, I started the due diligence right away. I’m so relieved I finally found some straight forward info.
I just got served because “Mom” decided to get hammered and drive crazy with her 8 year old daughter. All I could do was call 911 and have her arrested however because I did that, she’s trying to say I was violent hostile etc. so she HAD to leave in fear! Thank God I got some article. Still, I can’t believe the level of evil some people are capable of!
I never considered getting a restraining order until yesterday evening when my child’s dad completely flipped on me at the airport in front of everyone including his good friend and became irate and started calling me names and even throwing my luggage and tried to throw the car seat with the baby in it who wasn’t strapped in and then he started choking me. It was a huge catastrophe and no one helped me including the workers, on-site police, TSA, & his friend. That’s the 3rd time he put his hands on me and the second time he called me out of my name. He’s much taller and bigger than me, I bought a taser after the first time and applied for my gun license back in July but I have yet to receive it, as they are behind. I think he is going to kill me. I requested my house key back from him after the airport fiasco when I finally got back home and he threw it in the grass and I couldn’t find it since it was dark. He could’ve come back and snuck and got it for all I know. I’m very scared. I live with my 10-month-old and my dad is in prison, my mom and I don’t have a relationship + she lives 10 hrs away, my family lives in the city & south suburbs of Chicago but I live in the North Suburbs which is about an hour and a half away. It’s odd bc my grandmother and other family members warned me about moving so far away and I didn’t listen. He insisted on moving up here even though his family lives 30-45 mins from here as well. He told me I needed to move from my family bc they can be messy and hectic & I agreed.
I am so glad you covered this topic and highly recommend Gavin DeBecker’s book, “The Gift of Fear” for everyone, not just women. It hones in on the importance of paying attention to surroundings and the urgent warning messages our body sends us when endangered that we tend to ignore. It’s an older book but the info still rings true. In regard to Restraining Orders, many great points are made such as a US DOJ researcher concluding that ROs were “ineffective in stopping physical violence” and a prominent family Court judge stating that “women must realize that this paper won’t stop the next fist or the next bullet.” You are spot on in recommending women arm themselves. In addition to obtaining the means of protection I would further add that there is an additional, mandatory step to take: You MUST train to use that weapon because just having it isn’t enough.
Great Info and Yes when I left my Ex I had to get a restraining order and yes even though I had it he still came to my home I called the police and after the 2nd time I moved out of state near family and had more protection .this was 28 years ago but You need to be vigilant and protect yourself and your kids .
I had a restraining order but I knew it was just a piece of paper. I got the restraining order for documentation that I was doing all I could for me and the other person to stay alive. I also had a gun. Women get too emotionally involved that they lose their life. You can’t be afraid to die, so you can fight for your freedom it’s a fight I couldn’t afford to use. God gave me the wisdom to use the knowledge. Cross path with great police officers and assistant District Attorneys. You won’t die but if it comes to that don’t you be the one. God blessed and protected me through that horrible ordeal. I was fighting to be free. I have a story to tell PTL
I’ve been involved in abusive relationships and I’ve had friends who have been involved in abusive relationships. Restraining orders do absolutely nothing and put women in more danger. Law enforcement and the courts push women to get them and I don’t like that they advocate for this. I’ve been saying this for years. It’s about time police officers start telling people that restraining orders are just pieces of paper and do not protect people. Every person I’ve known that has been served a restraining order has violated it. It’s crazy. I hope this article reaches millions of women!
You are 💯 % correct! Restraining orders only deter the ones that are selling “woof-tickets (i.e. all talk). The only possible good of obtaining one against a truly dangerous individual is it starts a paper trail that can help you after you are forced to deep-6 the clown. However, you should be armed and prepared BEFORE you file it because there are many cases where the service of legal papers have triggered a violent response from the recipient.
I have a current PFA & charges are pending against my baby son’s dad. He turned himself in a few days ago & I’m pretty sure he’ll have a vengeance now. As a Licensed carrier, I couldn’t agree more, I’m ready for the coward to show up acting recklessly now. I got a few things for him! No officers told me this working on my case, smh. Thanks for the message 🫡🤝🏽💪🏽
As a fellow resident of Arizona and much as I completely agree with your suggestion to defend yourself I would also suggest that you encourage those that wish to carry a firearm to protect themselves also invest in the training to teach them how to properly and effectively handle their weapon. There are many people who rightfully practice their 2nd amendment rights who need proper instruction about law, rights operation and practical shooting. Thank you for what you do. Love your show on KTAR!
But too often women get them against men, who don’t deserve for the purpose of making them look bad. A judge named Trace Sherrill in Durant Oklahoma gives them to anyone, especially women, even with no police report, just based on the woman’s accusation. This piece of paper can destroy a wrongly accused man’s reputation.
I totally agree. When I was in the situation I was prepared to have a gun with me. My father let my ex-husband know exactly where the new camp that he bought in the woods in isolation was. Matter fact he brought him to this location which takes a 2 1/2 hour drive just to get there. I was extremely mad at my father because it left me with nowhere to go to feel safe. I was stalked for at least 10 months by my ex husband. Matter of fact when I went to buy a new mattress for my bed my ex met me in the store and already knew why I was there. Ex-husband claimed to possibly have cancer to get back in the house. Still I did not let him in. Fast forward 13 years and my ex husband still comes around. Some problems never disappear. I bought a pistol. He bought an AR 15. He makes people think that everything going on is completely innocent. He says he goes to visit the grandkids and I go sit outside because I was perusal the grandkids. He doesn’t spend one second with them. Makes me look a little crazy. Hear comments from my daughter. She says he is still her father. Yes he is her father. I avoid holidays and other events when I know he will be there. Imagine cooking an entire Christmas dinner and not eating. Then multiply this by many more holidays and several years. I’d rather be in my house alone from here on out!
My dad started teaching me gun safety from the cradle. He started teaching me to shoot at around 5. By the time I was a teen I could give him real competition at the gun range. At 18 I had an abusive ex boyfriend become a stalker (I dumped him the very first time he was abusive), I did not get a restraining order, my dad gave me a handgun to keep with me at all times. While I was a bit worried about him, I knew I could handle whatever came my way.
A long time a go, late 1960’s, I read of a ruling from the US Supreme Court, that the job of the Police is not to protect anyone, more specifically no one or single person. There job is to enforce the laws, gather evidence, secure crime scenes and do other things in relation to law enforcement. For a long time the motto on there cars “We Serve and Protect” was removed. I’ve only recently seen it back on police cars starting sometime in the 2000’s. I can’t remember what the ruling was on the “To Serve” part other than they are to serve the community. This ruling has been held up several times, looks like the latest one was in 2019. I believe the Motto was removed from there cars because it gave the public a false perception of the “Protect” clause. Like it or not, the Police are not Constitutionally bound to protect anyone. This is another reason for the Second Amendment, like it or not, self protection falls on the individual first. So Officer Tatum is absolutely right on this. An order of protection, protects nothing, no piece of paper or the words written on it can protect anything from anyone. To believe that it can is equivalent to believing in magic, sorcery or the moon is made of green cheese. The old saying “God didn’t make men equal, Samuel Colt did.” (Can be found written in many versions) is true to a point. Some men and women are stronger, some are smarter, some are quicker and some are more devious and deadly. Just about any item can be used to kill, just ask Officer Tatum.
I was in a 16 yr relationship of abuse, he was a drunk and drug abuser, he was only abusive when intoxicated, he made sure I never had phones to call anywhere, and the last 6 yrs no auto to drive anywhere, we moved his mom out our way, she got to see it and moved me in with her, in turn my CNA yrs came in handy, I cared for her, her last 2 yrs, was able to get life in order for myself, and my children I was able to call and they moved me to another state and to this day a yr and a half later never found me or has contacted me. Thank the Lord. And your right restraining orders are nothing more then a piece of paper.
The best thing to have after the order. Is a 12 gauge auto shotgun Get basic training on it as well. Your ex kicks door in, aim barrel mid body. Pull trigger several times. Until he doesn’t move. Don’t waste time calling the cops. By the time they would respond. You would be dead or severely injured! That Order means War. You can not be nice any more. Protect your self and your Children, from the Enemy!
you are 110% spot on mate. more often than not restraining orders if the ex is unbalanced do escalate the situation. Another aspect to them is that there are so many instances where women (especially here in australia) have put a restraining order on their partner just to spite them and if they are a gun owner then they are definitely kissing their guns and license goodbye for at least 10 years unless they can prove that they are not a threat in court and that is a very high bar much like a midget trying to beat a record breaking high jump set by someone 7′ tall. Another aspect here is the self defense option is not available here, not unless you want to spend a long time in jail. From what I read online that is pretty much how it is in some places in america as well and those also tend to be the areas with the highest crime rate. Keep up the great work mate
Omg THANK YOU for saying this. It’s a piece of paper. It won’t stop you from getting strangled, beat or shot. It’s so important people find the courage to ENFORCE THE ORDER EVERY SINGLE TIME! I was too afraid to enforce my order, but I am not afraid anymore because I now fear losing my life and that of my family more than hurting his fragile ego.
Everything you said is true,, if they are willing to violate that piece of paper just imagine what they would do when they do get their hands on you. When seconds matter the police are minutes away. Do what you must to protect yourself not only for you, but for your loved ones and those that care about you.
My abuser is still in jail w/I bond with aggravated assault and terroristic threats. The judge granted me a TPO. He also gave me only 24 hours to vacate the property. I lost everything when the sheriff’s dept served me a criminal trespassing warning and told that I couldn’t get the rest of my belongings. I’m homeless now
Thanks for giving your advice.I I just put an emergency restraining order in place today and in the morning I’m going to get my gun permit so I can go purchase the firearm. I thought He was going to take out the last time. Thank God I got another chance. I have always been afraid of guns but I do understand in the situation I need to do was best for me in my life.
I have a DVPO because my Daughter’s father is a Psycho, but instead of using that to “protect” myself, I got my CWP and a S&W 9MM. Just like you say, it’s ONLY a piece of paper and it won’t do anything at “physically” protecting you. ESPECIALLY if you’re ex is against following the law! In addition to that, I also ended up getting an 8 camera surveillance system for my house and property and an additional ADT home monitoring system. You can never be too safe when it has involved DV unfortunately.
thank you for the article, he hasnt physically abused me since i tried to file the restraining order the first time but he played me through the court and is still continously mentally and verbally abuses me because we share a child. together, this man is by the far the most devious human being i ever met and his true side didnt come out til i caught him cheating.i left and he begged me back, even bladed my name on his thigh to get back at me me. he knocked me down so bad at one point he looked at me in the eyes and said whos gonna help you now, while i was in fear he was going to kill me. He treated me this way knowing the fact that i pushed everyone away after i got with him. the sick twisted minded person who manipulated me and love bombed me from the very beginning just to try to gain control over my life and i feel like his motives was to get at my teenagers. i caught him watch teen porn once. sickening. i tolerated his bullshit for so long at the end when i stood up for myself, he tried to play victim and it actually worked in his favor. this is my childs father. how sad is it for me to deal with this narcissitic human being for the rest of my life. im still fight custody battle. im not giving up. I firmly believe in karma. he thinks hes so slick now. god will show him his wrong doings and how much he has hurts others one day and i hope when anything happens, he gets three worse than what he put me through.
I got restraining order as a teenager through an attorney my father hired. I did not know my father, but for a brief visit at age 11 in a restaurant. At seventeen I was terrified by an older man… That I ran away from That restraining order did not protect me. What I really had hoped for was my father to send for me or come an get me.
I have never applied for a restraining order, never needed to. I already have a restraining order, and its not made out of paper. The only thing I would say is that a firearm in the hands of someone without the “will to kill” in a situation like this can result in the gun being taken and used against them. I was at a gun store several years ago perusal the salesman try to sell a .380 pistol to a woman (with her husband/boyfriend present) for protection. She had a hard time even pulling the slide back or operating a gun. I had to step in. I told her man, just get a .38 hammerless revolver, just pull the trigger and it fires. Then I looked at the woman and asked her, “If someone breaks in your home are you willing to kill them?” Her answer “I don’t know?” My response, “Then you should not have a gun then.” I pissed off her man, the salesman and walked away.
This is what “junior” said about the Constitution. God bless you, Tatum. Justice. Really it’s just us in the face of those who run reckless and harm. Used to live in South Jersey, a cabin under construction in Salem. Rural. Peaceful in the 90s. Such a sad story. What the is going on with people today? Oh, yeah, drugs, whether street or pharma. Much more. Just don’t want to go there now.
AMEN. unfortunately I’ve had to do this and being drained from the abuse, but his manipulation you want it to work .. but for kids I got away w help from Ywca..left everything but I have my kids and life… and since I’ve advocated for single moms to carry!!! And practice. Pastors need to be educated to not encourage reconciliation or a wife to submit more when theres domestic violence or unsafe!!!
They’re talking about a protective order for my 13 yo granddaughter who was almost 2 weeks ago sexually assaulted by another 13 to boy right across from the school in a park bathroom. She obviously cannot carry a firearm. What is best for a girl her age? She just went through a self-defense class, but I think she needs more. She said she thought she could get away, and was scared due to his strength. A common misperception among young girls that a boy is only as strong as them when they are close in size… it’s just not true, and she found out the hard way. She’s actually quite strong, herself; but she’s still no match for a boy with testosterone.
I have a DVPO against my ex. I know it’s just a piece of paper, but at least it’s a piece of paper, with teeth! But in the meantime, God forbid he violate it (again!) & desire to do physical harm, I definitely keep my pistols close! I have my CCW, and I carry EVERYWHERE it’s legal. I don’t doubt he is capable of horrific acts, since I was already victim to some of those acts. I refuse to REMAIN a victim! Thank you for this reminder! I don’t need it, per se, but doubtless, others do! (Also, any male victims of domestic violence, since abuse isn’t limited to 1 gender…)
Hi Brandon Tatum, huge fan from the UK. We have similar Restraining Orders here, however we have security alarms set in place so that the person is a priority for the police. Sometimes I wish that we could have firearms for security reasons. Sound advice and guidance. Please listen folks. Much love from the UK xx.
Im a senior citizen 74,after 37 years next to my neighbor her 37 years old daughter and roommate began getting mad about our new ADU and began putting loud music with a bass I can hear it all over the house they do every day they do marijuana and blow over my backyard,I’m desperate I have panic attacks and heart palpitations don’t know what to do please help me
My son had a restraining order against him by his wife. He threw something’s in the bedroom. Not at his wife or son. It was only one incident. Has never been physically abusive. Never threaten her. After restraining order he has not tried to contact her except When using parent app to communicate only about their son. He is broken and sad because he doesn’t get much time with his son. He still loves his wife but he knows he can’t contact her or her family. He lives with me, his dad. He still doesn’t understand why she left and took their son. Other than that one night he did throw somethings. His wife was physically and mentally abused by her parents. Which made him dislike them. So he is stuck in a place of uncertainty.
Back in 1988, I had to take a restraining order out on my husband in 2 counties. The 2 counties local resident deputies worked together to keep him away from me. I lost 20 lbs in 2 weeks time because I was worried about what he might do. He was a crazy alcoholic. My dad had guns in the house that I knew how to use. I think I scared him when he came here one night and I took the 12 gauge out on the front porch. Thanks for telling women they need to protect themselves! Everyone needs to know how, because you never know what runs through people’s heads.
Brandon, long time subscriber, first time comment. Folks Brandon and most of you are right about R.O. However I would still advise someone in need to get an R.O. Because if you were to use some kind of force you can always say that you did everything you could to keep the suspect away from you and even obtained an R.O.
Castle Rock v. Gonzales, 545 U.S. 748, scotus ruled, (that a town and its police department could not be sued for failing to enforce a restraining order, which had led to the murder of a woman’s three children by her estranged husband. ) which means, the police have no duty to help you, protect you or enforce the law, if they don’t feel like it!
You also got to remember not every restraining order. The woman is telling the truth. In my son’s case she lied so he could never see his daughter again and just like she did he didn’t see her. And when she grew up and came and found him, it was a strained situation because the girl believed All the lies her mother told her. And instead of telling her what really happened my son. Just let her believe what she wanted.
I had a home and business maintenance business in Toledo, OH. I used to take my young sons to work with me so they could learn a trade and put some coin in their pockets. My youngest and I was replacing some windows in a home and I heard 5 shotgun blasts no more than a block away. I had a carry permit and we bolted over there hoping we could be of assistance. This guy blasted his pregnant wife and 2 kids and as we were coming up on it the dude blew his own brains out. I shielded my son from seeing the carnage, but I saw it. The same thing happened to me when I was a kid. Step-father shot my mother right in front of me and my twin brother, We were 4 at the time, but I’ll never forget it. John and I were sent to an orphanage and adopted the our adoptive parents tried to kill us. We ended up living in 13 homes in our 1st 17 years. As soon as it was legal, I got my carry permit and vowed never to be a victim again. Thankfully at 52, I’ve never needed it but every citizen with the legal and mental capacity needs to utilize their 2nd Amendment rights…If you don’t use your rights you’ll lose your rights never to get them back. This world is full of evil!
I lost my children over this. I’ve had several restraining orders on this guy in the courts told me that if I called the cops that me and my children wouldn’t be in danger of being separated again. but because he came back over kick the door down beat my ass and a friend who only had one arm. then later that week or so he tried to set my house on fire when I had myself barricaded in my home. I didn’t call the cops that time, but I flashed my backlight on my porch and my neighbor called the cops for me. my phone didn’t have service otherwise I would have called them myself like I always did . I had one of those Obama free phones at the time. Neighbor and I had this plan from the GetGo. He saved my lifebut it wasn’t good enough for the courts because it wasn’t me that personally called. They didn’t realize that I had no way to get out I was barricaded inand all the insulation under my house was burnt up. they still took my children because I wasn’t able to “protect” them from the abuse they’d witness. They were witnessing the abuse and I kept begging the state to help me move however they just decided to take them. if I would have realized that it was unjust I would have gotten a different lawyer but I had no idea what was going on at the time. I was so ignorant to the law. I pray other women don’t have to go through this and take action. Some of the consequences of the situation are totally destructive heartbreaking and soul crushing. While my children and I are separated he’s out there running around having more babies and abusing more women.
I don’t know what state you were a police officer in, but I’m willing to bet the situation I’m going to describe would be handled about the same way where you’re at. I filed for a divorce from my cold distant unaffectionate wife on July 19th 2021. An incident happened with a distant relative of mine on July 22nd of 2021. My ex-wife then proceeded to start talking to that relative and manipulate him into filing a false stalking no contact order while she filed a false restraining order against me and he filed false criminal charges against me. They found their false restraining orders on July 26th 2021 and the date for the hearing for me to be able to defend myself was August 16th 2021. Now I might add this is all happening in White county Illinois it’s a small town in Southern Illinois. I filed my response on August 13th 2021. On Monday morning August 16th 2021 they saw my response for the first time at 9:30 a.m. they saw it by 10:00 a.m. the state’s attorney had suddenly come up with a warrant to arrest me I had been in the courthouse for over an hour with no warrant being brought to my attention. Anyway let me shorten this up a little bit they arrested me and when the CEO and the courtroom got radio confirmation that I was being arrested they had to hearings. I hired an attorney and paid him $3,000 and he was not a defense attorney for me he was defending the state’s point of view. So they arrest me on a felony trespassing charge that they have no legal grounds to charge me with much less violate my fourth fifth and 14th amendment rights in the process of this.
I have a violent ex thats just psychotic and he wont leave me alone. Nearly broke my collarbone. After 2 years of financial and verbal abuse i left. He now is ringing off his mothers phone. Im vulnerable in very poor health and have nightmares about him daily. He rang my psychologist and my parents repeatedly and grilled my friend about her mental when its him that has a problem. Hes obessive and its terrifing. I wish id never met him.
Thank you Officer Tatum. I have a landlord & roommates harassing me with various harassment, Sexual harassment’s, coercing & nonstop stalking & even conspired plot, plan against me to even got Arlo audio & article recordings cameras by my window, now the Triple AAA employee coerced the landlord to get Triple AAA infrared audio & vido cameras recording me illegally with no notifications, on authorizations, consent, permission or knowledge of their illegal audio & article recordings with Triple AAA Infrared. Breaking entry has been done. R-o-h-n-e-r-t park & Petaluma PD are doing nothing at all but acting out & ignoring me. I called Alameda Sheriffs dept & SGT told me since both Police departments are doing nothing but ignoring me to get a lawyer. S-o-n-o-m-a County LEA all agencies are being sued for Mass misconduct, Invasions of privacy, Falsifying reports & statements. The Tenant Triple AAA employee has a hit list on various females at his job & threatened to kill them, End their lives, all the way to slashing tires which I had done. Now the ;landlord gave the tenant a copy of letter that I sent to landlord with complaints of his & his tenants conspiring, harassment’s, sexual harassment’s, & now This Male Predatory ill behavior tenant files a falsified statements & falsified reports of a restraining order on me. I am fully aware the landlord is part of it. What advice can you give me & help me with please. Please help…. Over their harassments, stalking, hate crimes, The Rohnert Park pd dispatch is nonstop harassing & ignoring me & my reports to compla ints as they have various incident reports they have ignored.
It’s All Worthless it seems at this point. I am a 100% Physically Disabled Combat Veteran Male. Lost my Left Leg while On Active Duty Service, I am 1/2 confined to a wheelchair, I was assisting a 67 year old man when he snapped, injured me, threated my life, and I had to obtain an Emergency Orde of Protection in WV where he assaulted me. I iediately drove back home to South Carolina and within an HOUR of me being home, 7 1/2 hours after being granted the Order of Protection, He showed up at my house, then contact was made an hour later at the storage facility where He and I maintained our Motorcycles at, and stored them. The Sheriff who made contact with the man LET HIM GO stating they had NOTHING to do hold him on, even though he PERSUED ME over MULTIPLE STATES LINES, and Violated being in an area in public which we would have had contact, IE…..the STORAGE UNIT…… NOW, 9 days later, I AM ON THE RUN to protect my life, held up at a safe place, BUT, Still, my rights are being VIOLATED, EVEN today, by a SHERIFFS Officer, claiming I was wrong, I have the Order of Protection being LEVED against ME!!!! Called the WV Magistrate, they said no, the Sheriff was wrong……I Have NO WHERE ELSE to go, I am trapped and I am being made to feel like the one who committed the crimes……NO HELP from Law Enforcement, No one wants to touch this that I have tried to reach out to for Help…..SO, My only relief now is my Personal Side Holstered Protection…..ON the RUN for MY LIFE……..
I was assaulted with battery by one of my husband’s family members and she had the nerve to say that she was gonna come back and “f*ck me up”. I immediately put a restraining order on her and my husband told me he was glad I did because he found out she tried to kill her baby daddy twice with a gun so now she can’t have any possession of a gun but my husband has one just to be safe. Gonna be in court tomorrow. I’m not expecting for her to show up at all but now she knows she was messing with the wrong person the whole time. A very violent, short-tempered person who desperately needs help and Jesus. Praying for all this mess to be a wake up call to her and her family that is against me too 🤦🏻♀️
on the flip side of this.. a girl i was with for a year got mad at me after we broke up and put a false claim in to get a PFA on me (she also did this to her last 2 previous boyfriends) and she knew that when the court date came i would be gone at the beach for the month and the courts wouldnt let me reschedule it. they automatically gave me the max of 3 years in PA and it almost ruined my military career. im also not allowed to carry a firearm unless its for work until july 2020 when the 3 years is up. thats some bullshit in my opinion. it goes both ways
Can the victim get in trouble for violating her own protective order? My wife attempted to contact me on Facebook by messaging me and I never responded and blocked her. Would this help me modify or dissolve the original order when she’s tried having contact with me even though she’s the victim in this case?
Over the years I’ve seen stories about what Officer Tatum was talking about. Too many times women would put their trust in the restraining order, courts and police to protect them and in the end would wind up dead or beaten to a pulp. Fortunately there have been women who were armed and saved themselves from stalkers, ex-husbands and ex-boyfriends. I remember one cop putting it simply this way: “The Best restraining order for some is the kind that comes out of the barrel of a gun”.
Not a fan of guns. I did get a protective order and it was a mistake because it’s not possible when you live with the person. Two cops came out and they gave me conflicting advice and I listened to the one who said to get one. Those orders are dangerous and make the situation worse. I would never get one again. Leaving and disappearing is the best idea.
My daughter who is totally disabled was assaulted by her husband. He and his friend lied to police and she was arrested. She had a dislocated hip. He took out a restraining order on her. Cos removed the kids and returned them to him after he took out the order. He locked her out if all her acciubts, she cannot to to her house, he had the daughter mace her while he held her down. We are now in the process of proving he lied, getting an attorney, etc. I found out this is not the first time.
This is what I’m going thru with the narc soon ex-husband. I did get me a firearm. I have a question to ask you. I make social media articles, I had to make a whole new page bc he was stalking the pg I had. I found out he found my new page and downloaded one of my articles and edited it to use against me in court. Is that a violation?
Listen Folks, locks do nothing but keep honest people honest. Use some form of door brace and window brace system where the bad guy has to kick the door twice to get in, that way it wakes you up an you have a few seconds to get your firearm. Most of the time you have about 5 to 10 seconds to wake up and be ready for battle. Leave the lights on in the rooms with doors that way you have the visual advantage. Always leave front and back porch lights on as well. These few rules could be the difference in you being dead or alive.
Yes, when I had to have one against my exhusband the judge said he wanted to make it clear that it was just a piece of paper. It won’t stop a fist, a bullet or anything else to harm me or my son. My only thing is that when he didn’t comply with the POA the police where I lived did nothing to him afterwards. I eventually had to leave all my family friends and job to a place that no one knew where we were. I had to start a brand new life and never see my loved ones again.
Yes protect yourself. I’m physically disabled I cannot run away from someone. So I have to have a gun to protect myself.people say oh you live in a good area of course I do but do you know where people who want to commit crimes come. To the homes of people who have nice stuff. I don’t need a gun to protect my stuff I need a gun to protect myself from the people who want to steal my stuff.
Many years ago in the early 1960’s a gal I knew had to get a protection/restraining order. To make sure, her brothers waited in the house. When the ex busted in the door, they shot him. Didn’t kill him, just hurt him a lot. While EMS and the cops were responding, the brothers had a “come to Jesus” talk to the wounded ex and let him know what would happen if he ever did it again. He wasn’t heard from anymore. Since it was in the early 1960’s they were not charged.
well this depends on the individual, did he or she really threaten you or are you using a restraining order to hurt your baby daddy from seeing his kids as it happened to me. naturally i wasn’t a violent person but after the way the courts in Minnesota treated me Ive learned to deal with problems with my 2 hands. 2yrs of court and not a single allegation was real or proven, i didn’t see my kids for 6 months all over things that never happened, yup we argued and didn’t get along but what she lied about that day still affects me significantly today. please don’t use restraining orders just to hurt someone, use them for real safety protection.
How about advice for men who’ve had restraining orders issued against them under false pretenses? Let’s not pretend that all of these women are all just innocent victims who aren’t using the system for revenge against the man. As a result, these men aren’t allowed to own or purchase firearms because of these bogus restraining orders. Ask me how I know.
My ex boyfriend assaulted me on March 29 he had a bail 15,00 this is his fourth open cases against me I did go get a restraining order I asked to be notified if and when he was released yesterday at 6:50 pm I got a call from the sheriff’s office letting me know that he was bonded out getting that call had me nervous and afraid not even 2 hours later he started calling my phone private I answered it and it was him threatening me sounding very angry I ended up recording the phone call then called the police I sent them what I had the recording and while I was on the phone with the police she let me know that they caught him and he is back in jail with no bond that was a very scary feeling he goes back to court Monday at 1 I’m hoping that the judge revoked his bond until the all of the cases are done even though I know that he is back in jail I still feel nervous and uneasy
That piece of paper can destroy a mans life when its used as a tool of revenge. Its totally useless other wise .my ex put one in me saying she was petrified of then i had to call the police to tell her to stop texting and harassing me(46 texts in ine night) 2 days after it was granted she wasn’t bound to it.
I was staying at a motel and this cleaning woman who was there treated me badly and then when I say something back to her then her and the staff call the cops and get a restraining order on me people are just a pain in the ass to deal putting restraining orders on just about anyone smh I wonder what you have to say about this please do reply back
I agree. If you are truly in fear for your life then get a gun because paper won’t protect you. I’ll try to make this short…my brother in law was served divorce papers (literally mins. After having sex with his wife) that informed him there was a protection order and he had to leave the home. She went to OK on a vacation & had her dad get her a lawyer. She spouted B.S. and ofcourse was believed. He was freaking out! You want to divorce someone? Fine. But to play dirty & lie to get a headstart on custody is disgusting. After months of following rules, listening to all the lies she told, and thinking he’d never see his kids again he DID get violent! He bumped her at a red light and then proceeded to have a breakdown. Was he righ?Absolutely not! Did I see violence in their relationship? Yes…..FROM HER! No one wanted to even hear his side. The system is rigged to place blame on men without question. IT IS WRONG and if you dint have $ to fight it then you lose EVERYTHING and end up a crazy felon.
I had a restraining order against someone who violated it constantly, held me hostage in my own house. I had proof, documented. Every time I called 911 I told them about the restraining order and they every time, even while he was trying to break my door down, would transfer me to a voicemail and I would have to leave a voicemail and wait 24-48 hours for a call back. They wouldnt even come. Then FINALLY they arrested him once they heard his voicemails saying he “didnt care about the police or going to jail” they CHARGED him with 15 felony counts of violating the order and then, gave him 30 days in county. Needless to say, I now have a concealed weapons permit and 2 handguns
I have restraining order in Illinois against my ex and a judge said tht apartment is basically mine to live in but cops told his family nothing can be done since i have a place to sleep but my friend im staying with will be moving soon and isn’t gunna take anybody with here so technically it isn’t tru and my child supposed to start school the 2nd. Im going to court tomorrow if cops won’t do anything
That restraining order may as well be written on a driveway with chalk. But unfortunately, obtaining a CCP (concealed carry permit) and carrying a firearm is only part of it. It’s a big part, but it’s still just a part. Also, always be aware of your surroundings, expect the unexpected, have a few back-up plans/ escape routes, and most importantly, get as much range time in as possible. After I completed my CCP class, I even took a “range proficiency” and “holster draw” course. A vehicle is just like a firearm. If you aren’t proficient at making it go where you intend it to go, you’re no longer attempting to protect innocent lives by stopping a threat, you have become a threat to the innocent lives yourself. Ever since I obtained my OC cert, I’ve been carrying a small can of Fox 5.3 in my driver’s door pocket just in case. Because I’d MUCH rather end a threat with LTL means if at all possible.
Still get keys changed, don’t use a 10 dollar deadbolt, get a heavy duty, use a quality locksmith company. As a locksmith the 4 inch screws will slow done a lot. Enough to have your firearm ready or escape. I am a locksmith and many times direct women to a carry class. Past I have had men try and force themselves past me. I’m not a small guy and I carry. 19.5 years as a firefighter I have seen the domestic issues to much, my triplets and I are domestic violence survivors.
I lost my home and kids while being the custodial parent after my kids mother moved out to galavant with other men. And 4 months later when the men were done with her she returned with a restraining order that was surprisingly served on me despite the fact that she had moved out 4 months prior abandoning her family. Just as I found out that she did to her 1st family 17 years earlier. How do I get this story out and to who???? State attorney or attorney General? I have sent the body cam vids to Lack Luster but no response as of yet!. Anyone please help!
found out protection orders are toilet paper and article evidence of my life being threatened is dismissed by cops. And its not always those closest to you that can put your life in constant fear neighbors can as well. I didn’t even know a protection order could be placed against someone who was a stranger to me. Always protect yourself because 9/10 the cops and a paper won’t.
I am in Texas. According to my chief of police the courts would not likely grant a TRO for my child or myself due to the wording of the threat left on my voicemail. He was able to get him on harrasment but that doesn’t protect my daughter from him due to the custody agreement. I am looking into other avenues to get the agreement modfied, if I had the money I would have just hired an attorney and filed immediately as the situation is complicated. Should I still pursue a TRO/protective order?
The only thing a restraining order is good for is to protect yourself if you have to use deadly force. It can help lay the ground work that you tried everything to not have to use deadly force. I had a problem with a neighbor. It got so bad that she threatened my daughter on my property. She knew that I had a gun. I went to the sheriff’s dept and asked, ” How do I use you to not have to shoot her. They filed a report and then told her that she is to stay off my property. It has worked so far, but I know that I have laid the groundwork for “justifiable homicide” if need be. I don’t want to be forced to take someone’s life, but I will to defend myself or my kids. Some people are just hell bent on self destruction.
Had a restraining order against my husband at the time but the dummy forgot one of his guns in the closet, so when he came to the house to hurt me …..HE WALKED INTO A SAWED OFF shotgun ….aimed right at him…..changed his mind and that was the end of that. He went his way and I went mine…..He taught me how to shoot and with a sawed off shotgun, you can’t miss.
I did not get my notification for whatever reason for this article. Thanks for the advice. I live on the east coast and was told from a police officer when i called them, do to people trying to break into my tenants apt, that their entrance way was a Public Entrance way. Therefore if a random person decided they wanted to sit on the stairs, in their hallway and read a book they could and nothing could be done about it. He seemed to be getting annoyed with the situation and proceded to tell me that it was the law and there was nothing that could be done about it, and that laws were forever changing. If i wanted to take it up with someone write to the president, which at the time was obama. We live in a Corrupt World. Wrong is Right and Right is Wrong. Hopefully, Trump does not become another puppet and do as he is told to do by the trolls around him.
I also dont know what is going through people’s minds when they think they need to file a restraining order before the other does. What is the point of that? Why do you want the restraining order? If you both dont want to be around eachother stay away from eachother. Let the other file the order. No sweat off your back. Why do you need to be first? Do you think that gives some sort of advantage in a situation?
My ex has been stalking me for 5 years. I live in a house so it’s not like I can just pack up and move. I had to ask him to move out. He refused. So I had to evict his sorry ass. The last time he came by was a few months ago. I came out, phone recording and my 9mm!! I recorded him, his car, license plate and made it loud and clear that he’s been told to stop coming here!!! I’m working on getting some security cameras next.
Question: I am in Romania, not sure about the legal system but let’s assume a professor has made a complain at the police because I have written some love mails and called him one evening to tell him I suffer for him. Basically he built a dossier from a few mails and messages and I made a statement(I was made to fill in a statement that I won’t disturb him anymore saying that the dossier will be open and a wider investigation will be made if I did so), what are the risks of being taken to court if I contact him, or go in the UNI he is part of to follow up my PhD? Is that dossier dangerous or plays as a restraining order or just intimidation from his part through the police? Thank you in advance!
After going to court and the protective order was served I found out after he convinced me to stop from filing the divorce papers and after 6 months he moved back in and he told me that he got into the house and had his gun aimed for me and regretted not pulling the trigger. I have a protective order however this time I left out of fear. I slept with my firearm under my pillow for years and I have nothing he has everything. I want to take the house back so I can at least survive for now. Utah is backed up on attorneys and I’m barely making it every month. The court only allowed him back in the house because I was not there. He went to jail for domestic violence and intoxication within 5 months of being allowed back in the home. I never thought that I would be in this situation and do not need anyone to tell me how stupid I was because I already know. I just want to be self sufficient and he almost had all of my stuff auctioned off after breaking the protective order and putting my stuff in a storage unit that I have no access to.
In Regards to the Person that Says that” their “Not the Paper their Written on”. Well To ME, They Only Serve A couple Perpose’s 1, It Can Make a Reasonable Person Back Off, 2, Create A problem For an innocent Man/person to be Wrongfully Judged, & 3, Added Evidence for A D.A. to use to Solidify Their case.
What sucks the most is a woman can cry wolf and nobody will second guess her, just believe her without a second thought, but she is the abusive one, and to have control over the father by using the children against him and he’s coerst into signing the consent form for the restraining order to take effect and then she sets him up to be arrested when she abandoned the home and the children to be in another state with another man and screws the man over with false accusations
This happened where I live now. Back in the 70’s I usta live in that same complex but I moved away I lived elsewhere for years but now I’m back. I live closer to where they found her ex Damn shame these restraining orders do more harm than good. Imo, I believe immediately after breaking up with your partner, you should legally obtain a weapon then a restraining order
It didnt stop my ex from showing up at my sisters. Intimidating me, shoving me down & taking my car keys & car. Both names were on it, so local cops couldn’t & didnt bother to pursue it any further. Got a call 6mths l8r, car had been found (what was left of it) when a chop shop had been raided. Owner claimed he had “found it” wrecked in the median & helped himself to it. According to a relative of his, Ex had sold it to crack dealer, hopped on a bus & left the state. Some1 ended up wrecking & abandoning it two weeks l8r. Until I got the call I assumed he still had the car. smh
Good information Brandon, especially when there are little ones involved, that what hurts the most is the fact that the little innocent ones are affected by this,I wish that anyone that watches this article or reads my comment will please think about how scared people make these little ones when they do these terrible things in front of they’re children I can’t stand even the thought of them having to see The ones that are supposed to be protecting them trying to hurt one another, they don’t understand why mommy and daddy are doing this to each other, and it scares them so bad God help us for ever scaring our little ones please stop if you are doing this and think about these your kids and what you are putting them through.
What happens if the person that took out the order lied to get the order and the defendant has proof it was all a lie? My so won custody of his daughter and the mother put a protective order on him so that she could take her daughter away from my son. We have proof that everything stated in the order was a complete lie. He did put in to have the order dissolved but can she be in trouble for lying on a court document?